Misheard lyrics (also called mondegreens) occur when people misunderstand the lyrics in a song. These are NOT intentional rephrasing of lyrics, which is called parody.
This page contains all the misheard lyrics for One that have been submitted to this site and the old collection from inthe80s started in 1996.
For more information about the misheard lyrics available on this site, please read our FAQ.
All my Bridgettes are mish for them.
Hold my breath as I wish for death.
All my birthdays I wished for death.
Hold my breath as I wish for death.
All my friends are like Rasputin
Hold my breath as I wish for death.
And I hate when my boogers freeze.
Oh please, God wake me.
Anything, nothing, yeah!
Left me with life in Hell!!
Back in the war, it's much too real.
Back in the womb, it's much too real.
Curry each other, now we do it again.
Carry each other, now we do it again.
D*** in my arms
D*** in my legs
D*** in my hole.
Taken my arms
Taken my legs
Taken my soul.
Deep down inside I feel this cream.
Deep down inside I feel to scream.
Did you come here to blame Jesus
For the leopard in your bed?
Have you come here to play Jesus
To the lepers in your head?
Did you come here to play cheesers
Have you come here to play Jesus
Doctor is visiting me, All that I see
Darkness imprisoning me, All that I see
Doctors, imperishible meat!
Darkness, imprisoning me!
For my breakfast I wish for death
Hold my breath as I wish for death.
Have you come here to play Caesar, and do the leopards in your bed
Have you come here to play Jesus, to the lepers in your head
Have you come here to play Jesus
To the lepers in your bed?
Have you come here to play Jesus
To the lepers in your head?
Have you come here to play teaser
Have you come here to play Jesus
Hold my breakfast down, wish for death.
Hold my breath as I wish for death.
Hold my breath as I wish for tea.
Hold my breath as I wish for death.
Hold my breath as I wish protein.
Hold my breath as I wish for death
please god, wake me.
Hold my breath inside wish monkey.
Hold my breath as I wish for death.
I can remember a rainy day.
I can't remember anything.
I feel hopeless.
I feel helpless.
I killed a elephant.
I can't remember anything.
I'm a freak, I'm a freak, yeah!
I'm afraid, I'm afraid of a ghost!
I'm waking up a gay Nazi
I'm waking up, I cannot see
In my Humvee
or
In my RV
I feel my heartbeat
Income tax that I must file.
In pumps life that I must feel.
Input slabs that I'm of steel.
It pumps life that I must feel.
It's too late, tonight, to bring the pasta into the light.
It's too late tonight to drag the past out into the light.
Jackin' myself
Trapped in myself
Just like a wart, I'm novelty
Just like a wartime novelty
Kelly and JoJo
Carry each other
Landmine has taken my sight
Taken my speech
Taken my penis
Taken my arms
Taken my legs
Taken my soul
Left me with life in hell!
Landmine has taken my sight
Taken my speech
Taken my hearing
Taken my arms
Taken my legs
Taken my soul
Left me with life in hell!
Landmines have taken my sight, taken my speech, taken my earring.
Land mine has taken my sight, taken my speech, taken my hearing.
Leaves you darling if you
Don't care alphabets.
Leaves you darling if you
Don't care for it.
Leisure baby, don't care
Leaves you baby if you don't care for it
Love is a tampon.
Love is a temple.
Love is a tampon
Love is a high and low.
Love is a temple
Love is the higher law.
Love is a temper, love the higher law.
Love is a temple, love the higher law.
Love is a temple, love is a higher ground
Love is a temple, love the higher law
Love is a temple, love the higher love
or
Love is a temple, love the higher lawn
or
Love is a temple, love the higher lawn
Love is a temple, love the higher law
Love is the Jetsons
Love is a temple
Now I spend my time
Just thinking of lines
Of yesterday.
or
Now I spend my time
Just making up lines
Of yesterday
Now I spend my time
Just making up rhymes
Of yesterday.
Yes, this is a cover of a Three Dog Night song.
Oh She-God, make tea.
Oh please, God wake me.
Oh for breakfast I wish for tea
Hold my breath as I wish for death
Oh my breath as I wished for days.
Hold my breath as I wish for death.
Oh my breath is high wish for death.
Hold my breath as I wish for death.
Oh my breathless highway, sput-tang.
Hold my breath as I wish for death.
Oh my breathless spa-ghe-ti.
Hold my breath as I wish for death.
Oh my present spaghetti.
Hold my breath as I wish for death.
Oh please God, chase me.
Oh please, God wake me.
Oh please God, make my bed.
Oh please, God wake me.
Oh please God, rape me.
Oh please, God wake me.
Oh please God, rape me.
Oh please, God wake me.
Oh please, Dad, rape me.
Oh please, God wake me.
Oh please, God take me.
Oh please, God wake me.
Oh please, beavers bate me.
Oh please, God wake me.
Oh sneeze, God hates me.
Oh please, God wake me.
Oh, my breast size is Double D
Hold my breath as I wish for death
Oh, my breath's a highway for Hell!
Hold my breath as I wish for death!
Oh, my britneys are whispotting
Hold my breath as I wish for death
Oh, my precious, I wish for death
Please God, wake me.
Hold my breath as I wish for death
Please God, wake me.
Ohh my breast is sideways today.
Please, God, help me!!
Hold my breath as I wish for death.
Please, God, help me!!
Old Pete, don't wake me.
Oh please, God wake me.
One cylinder sensation
One singular sensation
One grilling combination
One thrilling combination
One is the loneliest number, even worse than two
One is the loneliest number, whoa-oh, worse than two
The DEFINITIVE version of Nilsson's song. I like the subtle amplification in my lyrics of the problems in a two-person relationship!
One is the loneliest number, whoa, work to do
One is the loneliest number, whoa, worse than two
One love, one dud, one life, you gotta do what you would
One love, one blood, one life, you gotta do what you should
One love
one glove
One love
One blood
One similar sensation
One singular sensation
One similar temptation
One singular sensation
One simpler temptation
One singular sensation
One, let's break it into two
One is breaking into two
Oooh, my pretty size leash for that
Hold my breath as I wish for death.
Predatory juggalo
Predatory jungle law
Seeds of hate, but I saw further.
Seeds of hate blossom further.
She's alone
She's the one
Silence; we're all still sanctified by your question.
Silenced the masses sanctified by oppression.
Tattoo machines that make me pee.
Tied to machines that make me be.
Tickle my arse,
Tickle my legs,
Taken my arms,
Taken my legs,
Tied to machine that make me pee
Tied to machines that make me be
Tied to machines that let me pee
Tied to machines that make me be
Tied to machines that make me breathe.
Tied to machines that make me be.
Tied to machines that make me pee
Tied to machines that make me be
Tied to machines that make me pee
Tied to machines that make me be
Tired of machines that make me beer.
Tied to machines that make me be.
Tired of machines that make me beer.
Tied to machines that make me be.
Titan Machines that make me fear.
Tied to machines that make me be.
To the leopards in your head
To the lepers in your head
Too late, tonight
To drag the passed out into the light.
Too late, tonight
To drag the past out into the light.
Trapped in my cell
Everybody holding cell.
Trapped in myself
Body my holding cell.
Trapped in myself
Fighting my only cell
Trapped in myself
Body my holding cell
Two can be a bad a** one.
Two can be as bad as one
Two can be a fat ass one
Two can be as bad as one
We get to hurry each other.
We get to carry each other.
We're the tear in your fly
We're the butt in your face.
We're the tear in your eye
We're the blood in your veins.
Weeds are fake, but I saw them further.
Seeds of hate blossom further.
Well, it's too late tonight
To drink the past out into the light.
Well, it's too late tonight
To drag the past out into the light.
Well, it’s Kool-Aid tonight
Well, it’s too late tonight
What grill is gonna make it?
One thrilling combination
What is the loneliest number that you'll ever do?
One is the loneliest number that you'll ever do
What singular sensation?
One singular sensation
Whoa, oh, whoa
or
Woe, oh, woe
One, oh, one
Woman, oh woman
The wake is done.
One, oh one
The only way is one.
Yeah they say won't love want life
You will say one love one life
You act like it never happened
And you want me to roll the dice.
You act like you never had love.
And you want me to go without.
You act like it never happened
And you won't need to go with Al.
You act like you never had love
And you want me to go without.
You act like you never had luck
and you won't need to go without
You act like you never had love
and you want me to go without
You act like you never had that
And you want me to go without
You act like you never had love
And you want me to go without
You say, one love, one life
When it's one me in the night
You say, one love, one life
When it's one need in the night
You'll say love is a test of love the hired love
You'll say love is a temple, love the higher love
'Cause my beep is gone
'Cause my faith is gone
'cause my faith in God
or
'cause my faith is gone
'cause my fear is gone
A fart flying from your hands
In the instant that you loathe someone
Fire flying from your hands
In the instant that you love someone
A spirit bomb of earth and water
A spirit born of earth and water
And all I ever reading was the one
And all I ever needed was the one
And all I ever reading…
And all I ever needed…
And the beast is fin'ly (finally) fed.
And the pieces finally fit.
And the beast is finally dead.
And the pieces finally fit.
And the bee says, 'Fine with me'
And the pieces finally fit
And the bee says, 'Fine with them'.
And the pieces finally fit.
And the pieces finally fell.
And the pieces finally fit.
As a full of trigger
As I pull the trigger
Duncan Hines in chocolate cake
Drunken nights in dark hotels
Fire flying from your hair
or
Fire flying from your head
Fire flying from your hands
Go share your lifeguard's son
No shadows block the sun
I can show you what true love's kiss
I can show you what true love means
I guess you realized when I met you
I guess you were lost when I met you
I'll be the one to hold you, and make sure that you'll be alright.
'Cuz my beer is gone, and I want to take you from darkness to light
I'll be the one to hold you, and make sure that you'll be alright.
My fear has gone, and I want to take you from darkness to light
I'll be the one, to make all of your showers fun
I'll be the one, to make all your sorrows undone
I'll be the one
To make all your sorrows be gone.
I'll be the one
To make all your sorrows undone.
I'll be the one
To pick lots of flowers for nuns.
or
I'll be the one
To make all your sorrows more fun.
I'll be the one
To make all your sorrows undone.
I've been slamming it in my boyfriends
And I am so wrong.
I've been standing here in my footprints
And I am so wrong.
In the instant that you love someone,
In the second that the hammer hits,
Reality runs up your spine,
And the beast is finally fed.
In the instant that you love someone,
In the second that the hammer hits,
Reality runs up your spine,
And the pieces finally fit.
Like freedom feels when one holds a grudge
Like freedom fields where wild horses run.
Like freedom feels, without hose that run.
Like freedom fields where wild horses run.
New shadows from the sun
No shadows block the sun
No pharaohs black hole sun
No shadows block the sun
No pharaohs got a son
No shadows block the sun
No shadows block the song
No shadows block the sun
No shadows from the sun
No shadows block the sun
Shrunken knives and dark hotels
Drunken nights in dark hotels
So I learn to cook and finally lose
The kitchen folder.
So I've got the arms to cuddle in
When there's a ghost on the news.
or
So I learned to cook
And finally use the kitchen for ya.
So I've got the arms to cuddle in
When there's a ghost or a muse.
So I learn to cook and finally lose
My kitchen phobia
So I've got the arms to cuddle in
When there's a ghost or a muse...
So I learn to cook and finally use my kitchen for ya.
So I've got the arms to cuddle in when there's a bust or a fuse.
So I learn to cook and finally lose my kitchen phobia
So I've got the arms to cuddle in when there's a ghost or a muse.
So I learn to cook and finally use this kitchen for ya.
So I've got these arms to cuddle in when there's a ghost on the news.
So I learned to cook and finally lose my kitchen phobia.
So I've got the arms to cuddle in when there's a ghost or a muse.
Editor's note: The album has "kitchen phobia" as the correct lyrics, so I'm going with those.
Still there was cheese in your eyes.
Still there were tears in your eyes.
The beast is finally fed.
The pieces finally fit.
There you were in my pee
reaching out like you needed me
a helping hand to make it right,
I am going through H*ll all through the Damn night!
There you were wild and free
reaching out like you needed me
a helping hand to make it right
I am holding you all through the night
Though shadows block the sun
No shadows block the sun
To plant more trees
To plant more dreams
When chants his knees beneath the sidewalk
When chances breathe between the silence
When stars arrive
When stars collide
When the second Bethlehem is here
In the second that the hammer hits
Where sex and love no longer dare
Where sex and love no longer gel
You're all I ever dreamed of
You're all I ever needed
You're all I ever seeing
You're all I ever needed