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Song Parodies -> "Declaiming's What You'll Likely Hear"

Original Song Title:

"It Came Upon a Midnight Clear"

Original Performer:

Traditional

Parody Song Title:

"Declaiming's What You'll Likely Hear"

Parody Written by:

John A. Barry

The Lyrics

Declaiming is what you'll likely to hear--
Fake stories spouted by aholes.
What they have got to say isn't worth
Used paper from toilet rolls.

Peace can't be found if you tune them in.
Thank God that they don't try to sing.
There's no stillness as long as they bray.
Your eardrums will start to sting.

Through skies and lines voices and pix come--
It's mostly guys, but there's some girls,
Like Ann Colter, a raving psycho--
Lives in her own crazy world.

There's Rush Limbaugh, who favors cocaine
But really likes Oxycontin.
There's Bill O'Reilly, who makes sick sounds
On the phone, cocked like Onan.

In a barn you'd not find such a load
Of stuff that issues when these blow-
hards soil our eyes and ears every day,
More euphonious, a crow.

They cackle on and on, endless hours.
If you're lucky the phone will ring
And you'll enjoy a pitch from some toad,
Who, like them, offers nothing.

Each one of them's an overpaid con
Who by his pimps is bought and sold,
Like Rupert Murdoch, who's on in years,
Like him, their shtik's getting old.

Many of them are whorish Fox drones;
Others offer much the same thing.
If I had to pick one from the throng,
I guess I'd take Larry King.

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 3.0
How Funny: 2.3
Overall Rating: 2.3

Total Votes: 3

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
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 2   0
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 3   1
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 4   0
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 5   1
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User Comments

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Michael Pacholek - December 12, 2005 - Report this comment
You could've also done "It Came Upon the Channel Clear." In fact, knowing how you like to beat a theme to death, you probably will. If it's as good as this one, I'll five that one too.
John Barry - December 12, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks, Michael. I've decided to stop beating themes and beat my wife and dog.
Lurker - December 13, 2005 - Report this comment
Wow! Even ultra-liberals like you are beginning to realize that a major factor in the collapse of ultra-liberalism (read: DemoncRat Party) is the lack of a monopoly for the liberal "Big 3" network news, [plus the C(linton)N(ews)N(etwork), plus Hollywood, plus Time/Newsweek, plus New York Slimes, plus Washington comPost, plus NPR, plus PBS.] Even you dopes see that, thanks to the halfway decent Fox News Channel (which has passed CNN, PMSNBC, etc., in viewerships), the Drudge Report, and the many conservative (we)blogs, America is on its way back toward civilization, godliness, decency, pro-lifeness, and all the other good stuff -- abandoning the pagan chaos, indecency, pro-deathness, and all the other bad stuff of the "left." You guys are now soiling your drawers as you watch all your sick dreams disappear.
Lurker 2 - December 13, 2005 - Report this comment
Laura Ingraham - the centerfold of decency, if I remember correctly. Let's see, I think I have a back issue of a girlie magazine with her in it somewhere. Rush Limbaugh - well, as his attorney said, "it's not like he was buying drugs in the Bronx." Bill Bennett - now where did he misplace those millions? And then there's Bill Clinton - impeached for having a consensual relationship - charges driven by those "married for lifers" Newt Gingrich and Henry Hyde. The Moral Majority - no hate speech coming from their leader, is there now?

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