Making fun of music, one song at a time. Since the year 2000.
Check out the two amIright misheard lyrics books including one book devoted to misheard lyrics of the 1980s.
(Toggle Right Side Navigation)

Song Parodies -> "I Wrote A Short Ditty That'll Get Me No Fives"

Original Song Title:

"I Know an Old Lady Who Swallowed a Fly"

Original Performer:

Traditional

Parody Song Title:

"I Wrote A Short Ditty That'll Get Me No Fives"

Parody Written by:

Red Ant

The Lyrics

*pronounced as one syllable, "thall". Oh, I'm not serious with this parody. =)
I wrote a short ditty that'll* get me no fives
I dunno why I even still write
On AmIRight

There is a chance maybe you'll follow my pacing
Amazing? let's face it my pacing's disgracing!
Can't follow my pacing I'll get no fives
So I dunno why I even still write
On AmIRight

There is a chance maybe you'll vote me some fours
And those fours, are still a good score
I'll swallow the fours I botched the pacing
Amazing? let's face it my pacing's disgracing!
Can't follow my pacing I'll get no fives
So I dunno why I even still write
On AmIRight

There's still a chance maybe you'll volley some threes
My humor wreaks, it is weak indeed!
So volley the threes I won't get fours
I'll never get fours I botched the humor
My humor is rumored as fun as a tumor!
Can't laugh at my humor I'll get no fives
So I dunno why I even still write
On AmiRight

There's still a chance maybe you'll toss me some twos
Not good news! To see triple twos!
But toss me the twos I won't get threes
I never get threes I can't get fours
I'll never get fours I botched the stressing
I'm guessing, confessing my stressing's depressing!
Can't follow the stressing I'll get no fives
So I dunno why I even still write
On AmiRight

There's still a chance maybe you'll bomb me with ones
They're surely no fun, infact they're quite dumb
Still bomb me with ones I wont get twos
Don't toss me the twos or think of threes
I wont get the threes or even fours
I never get fours I botched the rhyming
My rhyming's unwinding and unappetizing!
Can't follow my humor or crappy rhymes
And I dunno why I even still write
On AmiRight

Then there's a chance maybe I'll pick up no votes
Totally choke and pick up no votes!
I'm wanting some votes but not three ones
I've gotten the ones and paid my dues
I don't want the twos not what I need
I don't want the threes an av'rage score
Be happy with fours? that vote is heinous!
More heinous and famous than spoofs of Uranus!
I varied the stanzas and hit my rhymes
Still I dunno why I'm getting no fives
Why do I try?

Well what's most important are comments my friend
And that's the end!
copyright 2005+ Red Ant This song has various authors listed. Click here to see some of its history.

Your Vote & Comment Counts

The parody authors spend a lot of time writing parodies for the website and they appreciate feedback in the form of votes and comments. Please take some time to leave a comment below about this parody.

Place Your Vote

 LittleLots
Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 



In order for your vote to count, you need to hit the 'Place Your Vote' button.
 

Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 27

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 0
 0
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   0
 0
 0
 
 5   27
 27
 27
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Adagio - November 17, 2005 - Report this comment
O....kay!! : D That's what we all want...5's.
carol - November 17, 2005 - Report this comment
bravo! good job 555
Agrimorfee - November 17, 2005 - Report this comment
Bravo, yes! Your humor doesn't "wreak" or REEK either. 555
Stephen aka Step-chan - November 17, 2005 - Report this comment
555, very ammusing. =)
John Barry - November 17, 2005 - Report this comment
I'm the fifth voter to give you fives. Kismet or coincidence? Very good parody, seriously.
alvin rhodes - November 17, 2005 - Report this comment
great concept...and it worked like a charm...5s plus
Kristof Robertson - November 17, 2005 - Report this comment
Self-deprecation and sizzling wit...what a combo! You just keep getting better, Antman. 111....hah! ;-) (ya know what I gave ya...)
Serafina - November 17, 2005 - Report this comment
I am the eighth voter to give you some fives,
Your perfect score, it is still alive...
And that's all right! ;)
Syncronos - November 17, 2005 - Report this comment
So, now that I've voted, that makes number 9 I guess it's fine to be number 9 And like the eigtht voter, I gave you all fives You perfect score is still much alive... See how it thrives!
Kyla - November 17, 2005 - Report this comment
...And so that would make me voter number ten, and if someone should spoil it, what should we do then?
Just like Syncronos, who was number nine, I voted 5-5-5, that's perfectly fine...
And like Serafina, the eighth voter here, I hope that the perfect score don't disappear...
That would be weird.
Peter Andersson - November 17, 2005 - Report this comment
I DKTOS but with such a trail to follow that's hardly a problem here, I'll just trust everyone else on pacing and should their judgement be poor (I have really no reason to believe so) at least I'm in good bad company. :-) and an 11:th set of 5s.
MasonR - November 17, 2005 - Report this comment
Make me number 12. I knew an old lady who swallowed an elve (elf?). LOL for sheer creativity!
stuart mcarthur - November 17, 2005 - Report this comment
wow, another fantastic idea from you Red Ant, and you didn't do the cop-out by repeating lines like in the OS, but instead sprinkled it with gems like "I'm guessing, confessing my stressing's depressing!" - what a great line, and your Uranus obsession makes me laugh - brilliant - 555
MrMacphisto - November 17, 2005 - Report this comment
heh heh... good job...
Michael Pacholek - November 17, 2005 - Report this comment
I found this one a little hard to swallow. I don't know why I found it hard to swallow. I guess I'll give it a five.
Red Ant - November 17, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks Adagio, Carol, Agrimorfee, Step-chan, John, Alvin, Kristof, Serafina, Syncronos, Kyla, Peter, MasonR, Stu, MrMacphisto and Michael P.

Agrimorfee: I thought I misspelled that, thanks for the correction!

Step-chan: I think that's spelled "amusing", though I am the last person on this site who should analyze spelling.

John: Since I can't remember off the top of my head what "Kismet" means, it must be coincidence!

Serafina, Syncronos and Kyla: Wow, three comments in verse. I'm truly impressed.

Peter: DKTOS?! I thought every person on the planet knew this OS! Its actually a fun childrens song to sing and was fun to parody as well.

MasonR: Not too many rhymes with twelve, good try though. ;-)

Kristof and Stu: Thank you much, I did repeat once in the parody but capturing the triple rhyme of that line wasn't easy to do. Hitting the quadruple rhyme you quoted was pretty good I thought. ;-)

Thanks again all for the kind and witty comments. I guess my title is n/a now either. :-)
John Jenkins - November 18, 2005 - Report this comment
Clever, particularly "My humor is rumored as fun as a tumor."
Huff - November 18, 2005 - Report this comment
Guess you were wrong Red Ant. Never would have thought of a traditional parody. 555, Your Eighteenth one. :-)
Red Ant - November 18, 2005 - Report this comment
Thank you John J and Huff.
PMS - November 19, 2005 - Report this comment
I am voter number twenty. This poem gave me laughs a-plenty.
Red Ant - November 21, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks PMS.
Dominic L. - November 26, 2005 - Report this comment
I'm guessing, confessing my stressing's depressing... classic.

I'm giving you fives
Red Ant - December 02, 2005 - Report this comment
Thank you Dominic.
Rick C - December 07, 2005 - Report this comment
Brilliant idea and execution, Red! You'll get nothing but fives.
Red Ant - December 16, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks Rick.

The author of the parody has authorized comments, and wants YOUR feedback.

Link To This Page

The address of this page is: http://www.amiright.com/parody/misc/traditional935.shtml For help, see the examples of how to link to this page.

This is view # 1330