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Song Parodies -> "Cold Time Revision"

Original Song Title:

"Old Time Religion"

Original Performer:

Traditional

Parody Song Title:

"Cold Time Revision"

Parody Written by:

John A. Barry

The Lyrics

Now we got that Cold time revision
We got that Cold time revision
We got that Cold time revision
Thanks to his policies

There’s a hood in Russia, Mother
Things ain’t good in Russia, Mother
Because of the f**ker, mother
And his hostilities

Now we got that Cold time revision
We got that Cold time revision
We got that old sing digit run
“Up your Glasnost!” says he

Wants to conquer all bodies
Of land lost by the Commies
To enlarge Russia, mommy
Like when Soviety

Now we got that Cold time revision
We got that Cold time revision
We got that Cold time restriction
Forget about Gorby

Wants return to USSR
First he’ll burn Ukraine and Georgia
Pate-burnished latter-day Borgia
Dangerous as can be

Now we got that Cold time revision
We got that Cold time revision
We got that Cold time destruction
Let’s bring back MAD!

He was with the KG program
Now he’d like to re-cage Poland
Might he revive Hebrew pogroms?
That wouldn’t surprise me

Now we got that Cold time revision
We got that Cold time revision
We got that bold-crime invasion
Crimea snatched quickly

At whom does he aim his ire? Us
In a new Cold War he’ll mire us
Geopolitical virus
Once in the KGB. . . .

Now we got that Cold time revision
We got that Cold time revision
We got that no-crime imprison
For the likes of Pussy [Riot]

The reforms are slowly dying
And the Baltics he is eyeing
Every word he says is lying
On a Red herring spree

Now we got that Cold time revision
We got that Cold time revision
We got that cold-crime extinction
By goons of enemies

He’s rarely togged up in gray flannel
When he’s gawked on a TV channel
He has dugs /jugs just like a she-mammal
About a double-D

Now we got that Cold time revision
We got that Cold time revision
We got that gross sight he-tits Hun
Double-deal double-D

With a lifetime appointment furnished
Because votes are enforced or purchased
Kremlin dome and his, highly burnished
Verdigris, vermin grease

Now we got that Cold time revision
We got that Cold time revision
We got them Cold time expansion
His purpose isn’t peace

Where is this malignant gremlin?
You will find him in the Kremlin
With his toadies and his lemmings
(With his toadies that ain’t Lenins)
He tells them when to leap/peep

Now we got that Cold time revision
We got that Cold time revision
We got that toe-line repression
Does he lead bears or sheep?

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 LittleLots
Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.7
How Funny: 4.7
Overall Rating: 4.7

Total Votes: 15

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 1
 1
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   0
 0
 0
 
 5   14
 14
 14
 

User Comments

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Phil Alexander - June 18, 2015 - Report this comment
Because he's Vlad,
He's Vlad...
..hold on a sec.. done that one already. Nice one, JB :)
Rob Arndt - June 18, 2015 - Report this comment
Good point about no more MAD. 9/11 asymmetrical warfare mixed with Islamofascism has eliminated that deterrent. If Iran gets the bomb, the entire region goes. No one wants to see a nuclear arms race in that region nor Israeli retaliation in the form of fireballs erupting. Pre-emptive is the way to go. Israel taught us that with Iraq's Osirik reactor in 1981. Bashir needs to go and someone (not Obama) needs to check Putin. Russia has sold advanced missiles to Iran and is moving 40 others to their western border as a warning to the West over Ukraine. 555
Leough - June 18, 2015 - Report this comment
LOL at “Up your Glasnost!” Well told!
John Barry - June 18, 2015 - Report this comment
Spasibo!
Jonathan - June 18, 2015 - Report this comment
Barry Nice! I was russian to give this 5's!
Timmy1000 - June 19, 2015 - Report this comment
Sad but true, JAB. He should stick to shirtless horseback riding.
Andy Primus - June 20, 2015 - Report this comment
Putin on the blitz. Probably the first time for "pogrom" & "verdigris" in a parody (unless you've used them before).
Steve Johnson - June 22, 2015 - Report this comment
Mr. Barry, perhaps you could do Michael Jackson's Bad as Vlad, eh?

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