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Song Parodies -> "Decked in Mall"
Original Song Title:
"Deck the Halls"
Original Performer:
Traditional
Parody Song Title:
"Decked in Mall"
Parody Written by:
John A. Barry
The Lyrics
Decked in mall by balled-lead volley—
Rat-ta-tat-tat-tat-ta-gat-gat-gat.
’tis the season to get quarr’ly—
Smack-a-smack-a-smack-a-smack-smack-smack.
Glom they now marked-down apparel—
Schmatte-schmatt-schmatte-schmatt-schmatt-schmatt-schmatt,
Pepper spray in use by Carol—
Blast-a-blast-a-blast-a-blast-blast-blast.
See the crazy fools before us—
Gnash-a-gnash-a-gnash-a-gnash-gnash-gnash.
Striking hard—watch out, they’ll score us!
Slash-slash-a-slash-a-slash-slash-slash.
Hollering in mayhem pleasure—
Bash-a-bash, unabashed, bash-bash-bash.
Vying for cheap Chinese “treasure”—
Trash-trash-a-trash-a-trash-trash-trash.
Grabbing everything they’re passing—
Grab-grab-a-grab-a-snatch-snatch-snatch.
Carol still is pepper-gassing—
Gas-a-gas-a-gas-a-gas-gas-gas.
Beyond boisterous, brawl together—
Smash-smash-smash bash-bash-bash gash-gash-gash.
Seething seasonal bellwether—
Gat-smack-blast-gnash-slash-bash-trash-gas-smash.
Rat-ta-tat-tat-tat-ta-gat-gat-gat.
’tis the season to get quarr’ly—
Smack-a-smack-a-smack-a-smack-smack-smack.
Glom they now marked-down apparel—
Schmatte-schmatt-schmatte-schmatt-schmatt-schmatt-schmatt,
Pepper spray in use by Carol—
Blast-a-blast-a-blast-a-blast-blast-blast.
See the crazy fools before us—
Gnash-a-gnash-a-gnash-a-gnash-gnash-gnash.
Striking hard—watch out, they’ll score us!
Slash-slash-a-slash-a-slash-slash-slash.
Hollering in mayhem pleasure—
Bash-a-bash, unabashed, bash-bash-bash.
Vying for cheap Chinese “treasure”—
Trash-trash-a-trash-a-trash-trash-trash.
Grabbing everything they’re passing—
Grab-grab-a-grab-a-snatch-snatch-snatch.
Carol still is pepper-gassing—
Gas-a-gas-a-gas-a-gas-gas-gas.
Beyond boisterous, brawl together—
Smash-smash-smash bash-bash-bash gash-gash-gash.
Seething seasonal bellwether—
Gat-smack-blast-gnash-slash-bash-trash-gas-smash.
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"Ho Ho Ho, little Timmy! What's that little spray can in your hand? Is that a present for Santa? Ho Ho Ho, now now, little Timmy, it's not polite to point your little spray can at San--AUUUUUGGGGHHHH!!!!!"
peppered with wit
he he he he he
Well ripped from the day's headlines
JAB - Friday Bloody Friday! Wonderful work here. ;D
The only sound you omitted was "crash", which neither sales nor stocks did. This is worthy of Tom Lehrer's satirical "A Christmas Carol" medley.
I take it , Carol was tired of getting mall'ested.......Has anyone done one about the parking lots yet?
I'll bet this one was fun to write!
Pirate Jack, Le Duc au Stroke-On-Wood, you're still whacked, all right, ! 'Tis a wonder, Sir, that you survived the T-Day !
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