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Song Parodies -> "99 Ugly Red Spots On My Face (Teenage Acne song!)"
Original Song Title:
"99 Bottles Of Beer On The Wall"
Original Performer:
Traditional
Parody Song Title:
"99 Ugly Red Spots On My Face (Teenage Acne song!)"
Parody Written by:
Jason
The Lyrics
Don't you hate it when you are getting ready to go out on a date with the girl of your dreams, only to find your face getting spotty from the start of teenagehood!
99 ugly red spots on my face
99 ugly spots
You squeeze one spot
And watch it pop
98 ugly red spots on my face
98 ugly red spots on my face
98 ugly spots
You squeeze one spot
And watch it pop
97 ugly red spots on my face
97 ugly red spots on my face
97 ugly spots
You squeeze one spot
And watch it pop
96 ugly red spots on my face
(Carry on until you reach 66 Red Spots)
66 Nasty red scars on my neck
66 Nasty red scars
You add some cream
It stings; you scream!
65 Nasty red scars on my neck
65 Nasty red scars on my neck
65 Nasty red scars
You add some cream
It stings; you scream!
64 Nasty red scars on my neck
64 Nasty red scars on my neck
64 Nasty red scars
You add some cream
It stings; you scream!
63 Nasty red scars on my neck
(Carry on until you reach 33 Red Scars)
33 Icky blackheads on my nose
33 Icky blackheads
You steam your face
Improve your grace
32 Icky blackheads on my nose
32 Icky blackheads on my nose
32 Icky blackheads
You steam your face
Improve your grace
31 Icky blackheads on my nose
31 Icky blackheads on my nose
31 Icky blackheads
You steam your face
Improve your grace
30 Icky blackheads on my nose
(Carry on until you reach 1 Blackhead)
And no more nasty blotches on my face
No more nasty blotches
You look so cool
Go on the pull
Arrrgggggghhh!!!!! 99 Ugly Red Spots On My Face!
(The terrified girl run off into the distance, Poor teenager is left in the lurch!)
99 ugly spots
You squeeze one spot
And watch it pop
98 ugly red spots on my face
98 ugly red spots on my face
98 ugly spots
You squeeze one spot
And watch it pop
97 ugly red spots on my face
97 ugly red spots on my face
97 ugly spots
You squeeze one spot
And watch it pop
96 ugly red spots on my face
(Carry on until you reach 66 Red Spots)
66 Nasty red scars on my neck
66 Nasty red scars
You add some cream
It stings; you scream!
65 Nasty red scars on my neck
65 Nasty red scars on my neck
65 Nasty red scars
You add some cream
It stings; you scream!
64 Nasty red scars on my neck
64 Nasty red scars on my neck
64 Nasty red scars
You add some cream
It stings; you scream!
63 Nasty red scars on my neck
(Carry on until you reach 33 Red Scars)
33 Icky blackheads on my nose
33 Icky blackheads
You steam your face
Improve your grace
32 Icky blackheads on my nose
32 Icky blackheads on my nose
32 Icky blackheads
You steam your face
Improve your grace
31 Icky blackheads on my nose
31 Icky blackheads on my nose
31 Icky blackheads
You steam your face
Improve your grace
30 Icky blackheads on my nose
(Carry on until you reach 1 Blackhead)
And no more nasty blotches on my face
No more nasty blotches
You look so cool
Go on the pull
Arrrgggggghhh!!!!! 99 Ugly Red Spots On My Face!
(The terrified girl run off into the distance, Poor teenager is left in the lurch!)
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Voting Results
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Voting Breakdown
The following represent how many people voted for each category.
| Pacing | How Funny | Overall Rating | |||||||||
| 1 | 1 | 1 | 1 | ||||||||
| 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 3 | 0 | 1 | 1 | ||||||||
| 4 | 1 | 1 | 0 | ||||||||
| 5 | 9 | 8 | 9 |
User Comments
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I have to admit, I'd probably give up at about 96 as a song like this would probably be very bored to me, but as someone who in his teens (not so long ago) had major acne problems, I can certainly relate. . .I never liked '99 bottles of beer on the wall', so good job mutilating it.
Funny!
Thanks BAD and 2:49 AM!
I was worried when I saw the title, but, actually, you're right about this being better than "99 Cold Blocks.." The "Squeeze one spot/Watch it pop" couplet was a bit gross for me, but overall, not bad. I smirked at the "It stings, you scream" line.
Thanks Jonathan S.!
Jonathan S., If you don't mind me asking, are you also Mr. Critic on this site?
he he
A different take on this most repetitive OS. Maybe I've heard a different version (there's about three), but I couldn't quite get this to scan to what I remember. Not lol funny, but overall a five for saving us about 90 lines of nonsense. 445 BTW, here's a joke a think you might enjoy:
A prisoner on death row has finally come down to his last day. He denies his last meal, last rites, meetings with family and friends, etc. He is led by the guards to the gas chamber, where the head guard asks him "Well, don't you have any final requests?!", to which the prisoner replies "Well, there is this one song I always loved, and I'd like to sing it in its entirety before I am executed". The guard grants him his last request. The prisoner starts singing "1 Billion bottles of beer on the wall"!
A prisoner on death row has finally come down to his last day. He denies his last meal, last rites, meetings with family and friends, etc. He is led by the guards to the gas chamber, where the head guard asks him "Well, don't you have any final requests?!", to which the prisoner replies "Well, there is this one song I always loved, and I'd like to sing it in its entirety before I am executed". The guard grants him his last request. The prisoner starts singing "1 Billion bottles of beer on the wall"!
Thanks Ann H! Red Ant, that joke was hilarious! Its good to see you commenting on my work again. Thanks!
No, I'm not Mr. Critic. Thanks, though, for at least asking and not automatically assuming.
This happens to me a lot. I LOVE YOU!!!!
(ABC4) I'd say have to agree with Red Ant above. There's really no optimally funny thing you can do to this song, unless you are willing to change all 99 verses! :)
That's a project in the making for you Agrimorfee. You're crazy enough of a person to actually do that too, as for me I'm sticking the hell away from this song, because I know there's nothing I could do with it or even want to do with it, and it would SUCK as a recording.
Matthias, you may not like the parody and that is fine, but your comment did come across as a bit on the aggressive side.
Leaves a crater on your face
(ABC4#)
After all that work taking care of 99 blemishes, I would not blame the kid for getting his hands on 99 beers and downing them in his despair. Hmmm - What are the odds, two drinking songs in one contest. One by Ag which is not a drinking song made into one and one by you which is a drinking song made out to zits. Amazing.
After all that work taking care of 99 blemishes, I would not blame the kid for getting his hands on 99 beers and downing them in his despair. Hmmm - What are the odds, two drinking songs in one contest. One by Ag which is not a drinking song made into one and one by you which is a drinking song made out to zits. Amazing.
(ABC) the trick with this OS is how to traverse the 100 verses without traversing them and still make it entertaining, and your quirky twists and turns achieved it Jason, but even if they hadn't, it was a very funny idea to start with - 555
I tried about a year and a half ago to get a group parody going for this OS, but it kinda sputtered out. See above!
Sort of taking a tiger by the tail when you start with this OS. You can't hold-on but you can't let go.I sang this song...on busses...on Saturdays...so I can relate. Funny idea and your jumps from 96 to 66 etc. were appreciated. Good job...
Pretty good stuff. Ignore Dr m, his comments never have made any sense, and he's been banned. 555
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