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Song Parodies -> "Onward, Muslim Soldiers"

Original Song Title:

"Onward, Christian Soldiers"

Original Performer:

Traditional

Parody Song Title:

"Onward, Muslim Soldiers"

Parody Written by:

Barry J. Mitchel

The Lyrics

Israel's Summer 2006 troubles with Hamas in the Gaza Strip and Hezbollah in Lebanon teach the old lesson, "Give an inch, lose a mile", and that tunnels trump walls. The UN and G-8 summiteers butted in for temporary peace. This Christian song was kidnapped for the ongoing global struggle and is a warning to onlookers. For original words, visit http://www.cyberhymnal.org/htm/o/n/onwardcs.htm or http://www.hymnsite.com/lyrics/umh575.sht or any pre-PC hymnal.
Onward, Muslim soldiers, launching holy war;
Double-crossing Jewry, as you've done before.
Hezbollah (Hamas too) speeds, as tensions grow,
Armageddon's battle, Persia's planners crow.

[Refrain (first two lines)]

Israel's mighty army moves on Muslim sod;
Infidels are treading where Mohammed trod!
They were not invited, just our captives three;
Done in hope of ransom, not in parity.

[Refrain]

Autocrats we cherish, freedom's rise can wane.
Europe will appease us, as they did in Spain.
G8s can quell but never 'gainst our march prevail;
We've Osama's promise that we cannot fail.

[Refrain]

One word, Jews and Christians: join, submit, belong;
Blend in, yield your choices to the Muslim throng;
Glory, laud, and honor unto Allah sing!
Back through countless ages, Mankind we shall bring.

[Refrain]
Permission is given to use this parody for profit and/or pleasure, provided credit and email notice are given to Barry J. Mitchel at bjmitchel@att.net.

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Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 3

Voting Breakdown

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User Comments

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Perilyn Patton - March 05, 2010 - Report this comment
if only I could write like this. This hymn is for the super-devout, the ones who have no humor. So, this parody is all the funnier. It doesn't have the usual sex or bathroom humor; what a relief! Great stuff.
Barry J. Mitchel - April 30, 2010 - Report this comment
PP, your comment on my 2006Oct27 work was worth waiting for! Check out my other parodies of that era, including 2 on the same OS and another about Jews & Muslims. BTW, G8s is pronounced Gates for meter.

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