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Song Parodies -> "The Picaresque Song, Part 7"

Original Song Title:

"The Limerick Song"

Original Performer:

Miscellaneous

Parody Song Title:

"The Picaresque Song, Part 7"

Parody Written by:

John A. Barry

The Lyrics

Having drunk, having made his escape,
Around the place he started to gape.
Behind another tree
He could quite plainly see
A large and curious female ape.

At first he was extremely frightened,
But as she approached, his mood lightened.
Her opposable thumb
And finger made a thrum
On his thing, and then her grip tightened.

Then she started to manipulate
His manhood, which grew rigid and straight.
As he abided it
She deftly guided it
Right into her wet simian strait.

Once he had got the massive gland in,
At full attention it was standin’.
A simian frenzy
Came on until spent he
With wild abandon in her canyon.

From that moment, they were a couple
Morning into night they would tup till
His grand mammoth man pole
Could sate the mammoth hole
Of her simian snatch, so supple.

But was found on this remote atoll
No effective means of birth control.
When he knocked up the ape,
He thought, “I must escape.”
And so off toward the ocean he stole.

From flotsam he created a boat,
And he dearly hoped that it would float
Launched it that very day—
When he was far away…
Saw a ship and started to emote.

His basso voice carried very well;
Ship’s captain heard it over the swell.
When they brought him aboard,
The crew cried out, “Good lord,
That thing could ring a cathedral bell!”

They all gawked at it in jealousy,
As if peeping through a jalousie.
It was no fallacy;
It hung there massively.
They’d nevermore such a phallus see.

Several swabbies would love to have checked
Out bucally with what he’s bedecked
Way down below the deck
Where at first they’d inspect
It, and then cleanse it while bent, crane-necked.

But that scene did not eventuate;
He explained, “I am a gent who’s straight.
They went back to haulin’;
There would be no ballin’.
So instead they went straight for the bait.

Some of them went fishing close to dark.
It was something they did as a lark.
But a tug on the line
Brought them a surprise find
As they hauled on board a large white shark.

Then, like Bruce in the Spielberg flick “Jaws,”
The fish was flapping its mighty maw.
Our hero got too close,
So tissue adipose
Went down south and stuck in the beast’s craw.

Again he’s devoid of his swain thing.
So he suffered a spell of fainting.
To forget what occurred
And keep his thoughts unstirred,
When he got home, he took up painting.

When he’s not painting with impasto,
He hears the strains of obbligato
While in the choir he sings;
Back his memory brings
Past scenes as he’s wailing castrato.

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Pacing: 5.0
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Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 1

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