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Song Parodies -> "The Post, Blunderful Slime, Reading Here"

Original Song Title:

"The Most Wonderful Time of the Year"

Original Performer:

Andy Williams

Parody Song Title:

"The Post, Blunderful Slime, Reading Here"

Parody Written by:

Michael Pacholek

The Lyrics

The Times is the face New York City prefers to show the rest of the world. The Daily News is the face The City prefers to show itself. And the Post is the proverbial "face only a mother could love."
It's the Post, blunderful slime, reading here!
With right-wing propaganda
the Post, I can't stand ya.
I grumble and sneer!
It's the Post, blunderful slime, reading here!

It's the sleaze, sleaziest paper of all!
With its Page Six of gossip.
This true? It's a tossup.
They've got lots of gall!
It's the sleaze, sleaziest paper of all!

There'll be liberals for roasting
dictators for toasting
and plenty of stuff they don't know!

There'll be scary Post stories
of murders so gory
and journalists' quality low!

It's the Post, blunderful slime, reading here!
There was story, a slipped start:
"John Kerry picks Gephardt"
but Edwards came near!
It's the Post, blunderful slime, reading here!

(instrumental break)

There'll be Iraq War boasting
and Dubya Bush coasting
and stories that turn out so faux!

There'll be scary Post columns
that sound just like Gollum
had written them long, long ago!

It's the Post, blunderful slime, reading here!
It's the paper of Rupert
but they've got those bloopers
of anger and fear!
It's the Post, blunderful slime
It's the Post, blunderful slime
It's the Post, blunderful slime
reading here!
"Dictators for toasting"? Yes. When Augusto Pinochet of Chile died, the Post printed an incredibly slurpy editorial. But there may be hope for the rag, as evidenced by some of these letters: http://www.nypost.com/seven/03092007/postopinion/letters/double_standards__the_libby_trial_verdict_letters_.htm

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 2.6
How Funny: 2.6
Overall Rating: 2.6

Total Votes: 28

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   16
 16
 16
 
 2   0
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 0
 
 3   1
 1
 1
 
 4   0
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 5   11
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 11
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

MasonR - March 12, 2007 - Report this comment
Well done! Here's a little story to add to the Post's slime factor...a young-looking lass came a-knockin' on my door one day and asked if I could help her work her way through college with a subscription to the Post. No way, said I. OK--I'll put your name down as a "no" she said, and off she went. The next day--and for the next two weeks, the NY Post was thrown on my lawn. I called them and told them I did not subscribe, didn't want it, and they should stop throwing their litter on my property. At first they said "we don't have you in our database" but after a few tries I got clever: I called their automated system and pressed a few buttons, discovered I was indeed in the database. I pressed a few more buttons, and suspended my subscription....until 2025. They called later to confirm the suspension of my subscription--"Aha!" said I, "gotcha!"
Yoidy - March 12, 2007 - Report this comment
Flows like a scroll! 5s.
alvin rhodes - March 12, 2007 - Report this comment
sensational
Ann Hammond - March 12, 2007 - Report this comment
singing and laughing
John Barry - March 12, 2007 - Report this comment
Headless body found in topless bar. But it had all five digits.
AFW - March 12, 2007 - Report this comment
Poetically, and politically correct
2Eagle - March 12, 2007 - Report this comment
Good rhyming.
Max Power - March 12, 2007 - Report this comment
lol
Jason - March 13, 2007 - Report this comment
Very good Michael. 555
Up Your Song - March 13, 2007 - Report this comment
Yeah, yeah. Of course you bash all the real news. This is why you lefty cowards recently wimped out in the face of Fox News: you were unable to face real, credible news sources. What will you do, I wonder, when your Old Gray Whore and all your other propaganda mills masquerading as newspapers finally go belly-up from lack of circulation as the Star Tribune is already within shouting distance of doing?
John Jenkins - March 13, 2007 - Report this comment
Very good title and some fun word play, MP. I’m not really familiar with the newspaper, but I suspect that you might be exaggerating a bit since Democratic New York Governor Mario Cuomo was one of the people who, in 1993, persuaded the Federal Communications Commission to grant publisher Rupert Murdoch a permanent waiver from the cross-ownership rules that had forced him to sell the paper five years earlier.

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