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Song Parodies -> "Need Back Issues"

Original Song Title:

"She's Got Issues"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

The Offspring

Parody Song Title:

"Need Back Issues"

Parody Written by:

the_conqueror_of_parodies

The Lyrics

You ever ask someone how to get into a comic series and they insist you read their entire back catalogue otherwise you won't "get" anything?
I may be a nerd but I still have my limits, alright
When I buy comics and I see somethin' new I might like
I talk to the owner 'bout if I should check out it
Looks at me and prints a giant list of the stories that I missed

And I say yeah-eah-heah, yeah-eah-heah
Oh-oh, man, need back issues? Man, that's not okay
Yeah-eah-heah, yeah-eah-heah
It just sounds exhaustin', yeah-eah-eah

Now I know I'll get some comments like "He's just helpin' out, mate!"
You should know about the big diff'rence between "help" and "keepin' the gate"

And I say yeah-eah-heah, yeah-eah-heah
Oh-oh, man, need back issues? Man, that's not okay
Yeah-eah-heah, yeah-eah-heah
There's "recommendations" then there's "turnin' it to study"

Shouldn't be an assignment (whoo-hoo)
Shouldn't be some weird kind of homework chore (whoo-hoo)
You're askin' for labour (whoo-hoo)
To learn about the twisted lore

Dude, I only asked where I should start, best storyline
To give me six thousand piles instead, I'm left here askin' "Why?"
You told me if I don't try to read all of these, I'll be lost
Well, I guess that means these stories have too many call-backs, a ton

And I say yeah-eah-heah, yeah-eah-heah
Oh-oh, man, need back issues? Man, that's not okay
Yeah-eah-heah, yeah-eah-heah
I want entertainment and not a research project, please
Yeah-eah-heah, yeah-eah-heah
My God, need back issues? Man, that's not okay
Not okay, not okay, not okay, not okay
Not okay, whoo! Wow!

Attitude's so controlling (whoo-hoo)
No ladder to reach some common ground (whoo-hoo)
So you won't get my bus'ness (whoo-hoo)
And I'll find a less judgy store in town (whoo-hoo)
There's more ways to get started (whoo-hoo)
There's more ways to learn that's not such a chore (whoo-hoo)
You're pushin' for labour (whoo-hoo)
Turn all my fun into a bore

I only just realised that I wrote most of this while watching Atop the Fourth Wall. Weird how timing works out sometimes.

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