Got an insect infestation
I'm gonna take 'em all down with this technique of yore
No pest-killin' corporation
All that I need's a Zippo'd can of aerosol

Say I ain't in my right mi-ind
It isn't sane to glue one li-ight
To a hairspay can, but I'm fi-ine
Cause when it comes to bugs
I won't take any chance-es
Cause magnifyin' glasses
Are slow as old molasse-es
I'll roast 'em all to ashes

I don't really have the patience
To set up traps and hope that they'll come out my cupboard door
Rather immolate my basement
With my new friend, the Zippo'd can of aerosol

Say I ain't in my right mi-ind
Could set the whole damn house ali-ight
No pyromaniac, I'm fi-ine
Well, maybe a bit, but
I won't take any chance-es
Can't squash 'em with my sandals
Too many, number's massi-ive
I'll toast 'em all to ashes

Those putrid bugs will all end up cremated
My rage for their mild nibbles will be sated
I don't care if you're still bein' disdainful
Oh God! No-one told me this would be painful! Whoo!