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Song Parodies -> "A Leg That Is Wooden"

Original Song Title:

"American Woman"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Lenny Kravitz

Parody Song Title:

"A Leg That Is Wooden"

Parody Written by:

the_conqueror_of_parodies

The Lyrics

Ah, pirates and their infamous peg-legs...when you think about it, they kinda make no sense.
Uh

A leg that is wooden, makes no sense to me-e-e
A leg that is wooden, confused as can be-e-e

A huge part of pirate lore
But when you think a few minutes more
The whole concept becomes unglued
And that's what I will explain to you
It's stupi-id, sense no ma-a-ake (uh)
A leg that is woode-en, gives me a heada-a-ache (uh)

A leg that is wooden, omnipresent sce-e-ene
A leg that is woode-en, on the silver scree-ee-een

The shape's what I most abhor
Way too round, gonna get stuck in the floor
It wouldn't be a big surprise
If that means their boats capsized
So stupi-id, kinda la-a-ame (uh)
Those legs that are woode-en have a stupid sha-a-a-ape (uh)

Uh

A leg that is wooden, lackin' feet alwa-a-ays
A leg that is woode-en, least from what's displa-a-ayed

One more part of pirate lore
Is that they're filthy, germs in hoards
Since they don't keep themselves clean
Doubt their peg-legs would last, see
And since they're not very lithe
Those peg-legs would snap quick-like

So stupi-id, very la-a-ame
Those legs that are woode-en would soon split in twai-ai-ai-ain
A leg that is wooden, well, it seems to me-e-e
A leg that is wooden would make splintered knee-ee-ees

How would they run fast in a getaway?
If it's soaked in rum, would it then ro-ot awa-ay?
And since the dumb thing's woode-en
Huge reason why it's stupi-i-id
It's such a fi-ire haza-ard
For foes to take advanta-a-age
That's why, why, that's why, why
Why I-I-I-I-I, why I (hate legs that are wooden)
Seems so dumb to me, maybe the same for you (hate legs that are wooden)
But if you think that they're alright
Then what am I supposed to do (hate legs that are wooden)?
May think peg-legs are stupi-id
Complete and utter jokes (hate legs that are wooden)
You may think that they're aweso-ome
And you should know (hate legs that are wooden)
Do-o-on't think you're dopes
For liking those legs that are all wooden, yeah

I think the only time a peg-leg showed up in the Pirates of the Caribbean was Davy Jones having a crab leg styled like one...which is better (cause as part of his body it wouldn't be as weak as one made of wood) and worse (cause it's got an even smaller footprint than your standard peg-leg).

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Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 4

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User Comments

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Jonathan - March 29, 2016 - Report this comment
Argh! and the termites! them termites be the worst! 5's

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