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Song Parodies -> "Skate Up"

Original Song Title:

"Straight Up"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Paula Abdul

Parody Song Title:

"Skate Up"

Parody Written by:

the_conqueror_of_parodies

The Lyrics

A tale of my experiences with the Tony Hawk's Pro Skater franchise! Because reasons.
If you asked me
Which game series I've played loads
A-let me say it's not Final Fantasy
Metal Gear or Grand Theft (Grand Theft) Auto, no-o
I was grabbin' boards
Grindin' on telephone wi-ires, physics out the door
Multiplier was in the fifties

Skate up, believe me
I played way too much Tony Hawk's Pro Skater, oh, oh, oh
American Wasteland and both T.H.U.Gs
Skate up, believe me
I was obsessed with Tony Hawk's Pro Skater, oh, oh, oh
All nine goa-oals done in one run

I got my fill
Of huntin' for gaps (loved huntin' for gaps), wo-ords blue
A-let me tell ya now, nothin' beats the thrill
Beatin' that one goal (that one bullshit goal), it's true-ue
Button mash galore
Slowly gainin' spots on the Project 8 leaderboard
Though I never got past Number Three

Skate up, believe me
I played too damn much Tony Hawk's Pro Skater, oh, oh, oh
Though I never got the first two ones
Skate up, believe me
I cared too much 'bout Tony Hawk's Pro Skater, oh, oh, oh
Man, I swea-eared a bit too much

Unlockin' ev'ry cheat
Play them on re-epeat
And constantly addin'
Songs that get played in the games
To my playli-ist, ma-a-a-ate
No l-l-l-lie, l-l-l-l-lie
All because I loved 'em (yes, it's true I loved 'em)
Buddy (no lies now)
In fact, I still love 'em (I still friggin' love 'em)
A-tell me, buddy

If you grabbed ev'ry board
So often you knew off hand where they were like a dork
Would that be worth some pity?
Because that's how well I know all of these games
You may think it's rather sad
But I think it proves I worked hard at that
More important that I am happy (happy, I'm happy)

Skate up, believe me (happy)
Skate up, can't tell me (tell me)
Skate up, I wasted (wasted)
Skate up, my time with
Skate up, these games, prick

Skate up, believe me
Played a whole lot of Tony Hawk's Pro Skater, oh, oh, oh
Though I never finished the ninth one
Skate up, believe me
Nothin' wrong with that Tony Hawk's Pro Skater, oh, oh, oh
'Cept I gue-ess game-killin' bugs
Skate up, believe me
Played too friggin' much Tony Hawk's Pro Skater, oh, oh, oh
In multiplayer, though, not that much
Skate up, believe me
Mostly played solo Tony Hawk's Pro Skater, oh, oh, oh
Was oka-ay, cause my bro sucked

No, I never got the Ride/Shred games with that stupid skateboard peripheral. Because money reasons. Which is the same reason why I didn't go out and get THPS5, though "not owning any of the relevant consoles" and "being an apparently buggy pile of crap" contributed.

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 LittleLots
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.3
How Funny: 4.3
Overall Rating: 4.3

Total Votes: 19

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
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 2   0
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 3   1
 1
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 4   0
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 5   15
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 15
 

User Comments

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Sigh........ - July 19, 2016 - Report this comment
Don't you have a day job?

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