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Song Parodies -> "Crimes Are Ursine"

Original Song Title:

"Like a Virgin"

Original Performer:


Parody Song Title:

"Crimes Are Ursine"

Parody Written by:

John A. Barry

The Lyrics

The glades out in the wilderness
occupied by some dudes
there to picnic and have fun…
got a lot of food.
Plan to eat lots of treats.
In his pad with a baddish ’tude
is a bear who steals
such visitors’ meals…
attitude’s crude.

Food! Crimes are ursine—
lunch foraged ’fore folks can dine.
Crimes are ursine
in the park…Jellystone sign.

They’re gonna take all your lunch, oy!
They gaze on your repast,
during the lazy interlude
when briefly off you dash.
You can’t dine anytime
these bears are on a Jelly’ roll.
Your picnic they’ll rout—
of that, there’s no doubt.
Looting is their role.

Crimes are ursine, yeah!
Lunch hoarded ’fore you can dine.
Crimes are ursine,
in the park, under the pines.

Yogi, Boo-Boo!

You won’t dine,
and you’ll whine
as they gorge
just like ursine swine.
They brazenly steal
what should be your meal:
the main dish and sides.

Crimes are ursine, Boo-Boo!
Crimes are ursine…
Yogi by his side.
They rob boldly,
stealing park eats,
like your lunch meat.
Where’s that dummy ranger?
where to be seen
Is he walking his beat
or napping ’neath the pines?

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 10

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   10

User Comments

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Matthias - May 31, 2018 - Report this comment
Lots of Yogi love today! 2 parodies about these pic-a-nic basket stealing beasts! Love your work here John!
Agrimorfee - May 31, 2018 - Report this comment
Never knew how to pronounce "ursine" until today. It must be a good day. :)
Matthias - May 31, 2018 - Report this comment
Also they should call you "John A Beary" for this one! Haha
Guy - May 31, 2018 - Report this comment

Jelly stoned. They'd have to be to munch out so much. Well done, Sir John.
JAB - May 31, 2018 - Report this comment
Thanks, all, for bearing with me.
Peregrin - May 31, 2018 - Report this comment
Great minds think alike, JAB? :) I like how our parodies compliment each other - not surprisingly, there are a few cross-overs, which are great to see. "lunch foraged ’fore folks can dine" was my fave, closely followed by how they waited until the picnickers dashed off to the can :)
? - May 31, 2018 - Report this comment
Legit post Mr. Barry or just checking where Rob is?
Jeff Reuben - June 01, 2018 - Report this comment
Great work John!
Stuart McArthur - June 01, 2018 - Report this comment
Well look on the bright side JAB. If they're eating your picnic stuff, they're not eating you. That's something isn't it? Nice read, with lovely pacing - 555
Peter Andersson - June 03, 2018 - Report this comment
Those damn millenial bears thinking they're entitled to free picnics! What's wrong with old fashioned blueberries?

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