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Song Parodies -> "Unsubtle Whistler"

Original Song Title:

"Careless Whisper"

Original Performer:

George Michael

Parody Song Title:

"Unsubtle Whistler"

Parody Written by:


The Lyrics

Ah, the classic not-so-innocent whistle. I have no idea if this was ever taken seriously, but these days no-one buys it. Especially not this bank security guard
Oh, oh-ooh-oh, oh-oh-oh-oh

Want this pla-ace se-ecu-ure
From folks with bad plans
And you, out by the front door
You have caught my eye-eye
Not the way you try-y-y
To affect a casual lean
On the doors that self-slide

Afraid you've tipped your hand, my friend
By the fake-ass way you whistle
Your plans wi-ill come to an end
Because you're such a foo-oo-ool
Cause nobody whistles anymore, except
To cover up a crime committed
So now your ass is under arrest
And all thanks to your tu-u-une

Of all evide-ence
Unsubtle whistle has spelled your end
You may try to hi-ide
Balaclava sty-y-yle
But red-handed, I've caught you
Simple fa-a-act of li-i-ife

That durin' a bank heist attempt
You should be silent, don't whistle
Not that you-ou should try again
I'm just no fan of foo-oo-ools
You're not really hidin' those guns 'neath your vest (little obvious)
I count two rifles and six pistols (yeah-eah)
That's a little overkill, my friend
But whistlin' has scre-ewed you-ou

This ain't The La-azy Song

Are there fellow thieves i-in the crowd?
That thought just crossed my mind right now
Maybe your whistle meant "Hey
The coast is clear, Phase Two should now be underway"
If so, a word to you-our thief brothers:
Your watch failed to be u-undercover
You'd better su-urrende-er to me-e

It seems that your plan has gone to shi-it
All because of one forced whistle
Wasn't a-any cleverne-ess
Used here, just a big foo-oo-oo-oo-ool
The other guards can hear me, so the-ey'll arre-est
Any other failed thievin' morons
Only thing that you've done is infe-ect
My poor brain with that tu-u-u-u-une

Wish it was gone
I ha-ate that so-ong
Made me pissed o-off
It's all that you have wo-on
A sma-all silver linin', hei-eist you-ou've still blo-o-o-o-o-own

No, I didn't transcribe that "da-da-da"'s at the end. If this was recorded I'd probably whistle that segment. Also, I think that years of mocking usage has robbed Careless Whisper of any legit sex appeal it once had, though that might just be me.

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Voting Results

Pacing: 3.6
How Funny: 3.6
Overall Rating: 3.6

Total Votes: 7

Voting Breakdown

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    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 2   1
 3   1
 4   1
 5   3

User Comments

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Jonathan - February 25, 2016 - Report this comment
you're kidding! this OS had sex appeal? I mean I like it and all but not in that way! 5's

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