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Song Parodies -> "The Maths Test"

Original Song Title:

"The Reflex"

Original Performer:

Duran Duran

Parody Song Title:

"The Maths Test"

Parody Written by:


The Lyrics

I'm pretty good at maths, even though I despise it with the very soul of my being. This guy also hates it, though he really sucks...
A Maths Test?
A Maths Test?!
A MATHS Test?!?

I screwed it up last time
'Cause I said x equals thirty-nine
Well, okay, I got the rest wrong as well
Like I know what the hell's a cosine?
When I'm in class, I do know it
But in a test, my mind goes blank! Oh no!
Point-five times by nine equals something
Should scribble cheats on to my hand! Oh-whoa

But why should I know it?
I can't recall it!
I've no use for it

Just cuz you use it
Don't mean I'LL need it
My time is wasted

A Maths test is a scary time
My mind's a total blank
This Maths test won't be one I'm passing
I'd rather doodle tanks
One more thing - what's this chord you speak of?
Isn't that music?*
Every single thing this maths test asks
Leaves me reeling like I'm really sick

Stuck in this room and I wanna get out
But they do not care, no not at all
I've solved this question so I'm feeling good
But this next one doesn't make sense at all

So how can I do it?
Cannot get through it
There's no point to it

Well, pi might mean something...

This maths test really tests my mind
And that sure isn't fun!
This maths test, though I still keep trying
I never will get done
One more thing - all these damn square root signs
Isn't that too hard?
Every single thing this maths test asks
Leaves me feeling like I'm 'bout to barf

So why must I do it?
I will just screw it
Tried, still can't do it

This maths test is a bastard, man
It's really f*cking hard!
This maths test is, to me, more painful
Than a kick in the nards!
One more thing - I plain suck at adding
So why am I in here?
Every single time a maths test starts
Starts me screaming 'cause I'm filled with fear!

This maths test
Hurts my brain
And that's only the start...
(Fade out)
* A 'chord' in maths is a part of a circle. Why they called it is beyond me - I'm used to chord being something you play on a guitar or piano...

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.6
How Funny: 4.6
Overall Rating: 4.6

Total Votes: 17

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 2   0
 3   0
 4   2
 5   14

User Comments

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UnKnownVotrix - July 07, 2008 - Report this comment
Sir, please focus, just stay focused, Sir !
Agrimorfee - July 11, 2008 - Report this comment
(Artisty) What the hell is it with the 1-bombs? Conqy, you brought me back to my horrible Geometry 101 classes in Junior Year. I will have to punish you for that with a 555. Very funny.
Matthias - July 12, 2008 - Report this comment
You aced this parody! There were a few parts of this song you left out, but just because I parody every single part of those Mr. Bungle songs doesn't mean that you have to parody every single part of your parodies...
Max Power - July 12, 2008 - Report this comment
Whoever didn't give this the perfect score either sucked at math or should be sent to Pluto.
Syncronos - July 23, 2008 - Report this comment
Quit cheating off my paper! 55 X 11 is NOT 555!!
Rex - July 24, 2008 - Report this comment
When they asked my to define geometry, I said, "I planted an acorn that grew up and said 'Gee I'm a tree'". Great work here.
Below Average Dave - July 24, 2008 - Report this comment
Well TCOP, I must say you passed the Duran Duran test:) You did leave out the extra stuff in the background, but honestly, I can't imagine having to read that stuff anyway, very very good.
Jeff Reuben - August 02, 2008 - Report this comment
(SOTM) I'm going to agree, this is one of my favs of yours (the geek theme always gets me). I've played around with this song and it's tougher than it seems IMO, you did a wonderful job with it!
Jason - August 10, 2008 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Obviously whoever gave you 1s is totally math-defunct. 555
Max Power - August 11, 2008 - Report this comment
See above
Matthias - August 12, 2008 - Report this comment
Got 2nd place in the Duran Duran round so of course it's good... And I can really relate to this parody as well, because I sucked at Math back in school.
Peter Andersson - August 14, 2008 - Report this comment
CoP he took a test
e π e π 0
And on that test he must have guessed
e π e π 0
Agrimorfee - August 14, 2008 - Report this comment
Peter: With a nu, nu here and a nu, nu there? :)
Guy - August 17, 2008 - Report this comment

Nice and if Ptolemy were here to comment he's probably say "Η Μεγάλη Σύνταξις"! Math has a lot to do with curves and angles. Same with good lookin' women - as long as they got the curves I got the angels. I like the pure geekiness of this since I myself am a geek freak like the Greek geek Ptolemy. Well done!
Agrimorfee - August 18, 2008 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Refresher course still passes with flying colors.
Red Ant - August 31, 2008 - Report this comment
I have to admit that geometry was my least favorite subject in high school - it didn't help that the teacher was the worst I ever had. Good stuff, tcop; fits TOS quite well. and "nards" is always funny. I liked the tank doodling as well.
Below Average Dave - August 31, 2008 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Well, I could be simple and just say 'see above' but you know me, I rarely say very little. I don't have a lot I can add though here, It's funny and well written, no one line sticks out for me to add to. . .TOS deserves it's parodies though-that's for sure.
Invisible Boy - August 31, 2008 - Report this comment
Brought back some memories. Actually I liked math, and I love the ways you use the word "maths".Good stuff.
If you ever need help getting a loan, don't hesitate to ask...I'll be happy to cosine.
Invisible Boy - March 31, 2009 - Report this comment
fun to read again.
C squared still equals A squared plus B squared.
Amanda - March 16, 2013 - Report this comment
I hate math with a burning passion and have no idea why teachers assign it. 5's!

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