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Song Parodies -> "R.B. Hayes"

Original Song Title:

"Glory Days"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Bruce Springsteen

Parody Song Title:

"R.B. Hayes"

Parody Written by:

Michael Pacholek

The Lyrics

Though he won a Presidential election, Samuel Jones Tilden doesn't get a parody. But Rutherford Birchard Hayes, whom Tilden beat in 1876, does. "Centennial Sam" is all but forgotten now -- but would Hayes appreciate how he is remembered? Let's not forget that Florida votes were stolen in that election, too.
I had a friend, a Cincinnati lawyer
led his law school.
He went and fought in the Union Army
beat Confederate fool-boys.
Went back to Ohio, elected Governor.
Now President Grant is walkin' out.
And the Party leaders decide over cigars and a few drinks.
Who should be President? How about...

R.B. Hayes, yeah, he'll pass on by.
R.B. Hayes, make the Democrats cry.
R.B. Hayes, R.B. Hay-ay-ay-ayes.

Well, 'round the world, and around the block
the election turned all the boys' heads.
Ol' Sam Tilden won it, that what everybody thought
as they were puttin' themselves to bed.
But the Hayes lobby, well, they stayed up.
I guess it's too bad, bye-bye, Sam.
They went down South, and fooled with the voting rolls.
"Foul!" the Democrats are cryin', but there's just laughin' about this sham.

R.B. Hayes, yeah, he'll pass on by.
R.B. Hayes, make the Democrats cry.
R.B. Hayes, R.B. Hay-ay-ay-ayes.

Whoo!

Think I'm goin' down to the history books.
I'm gonna read 'til I get my fill.
And I hope that when I get older, history won't repeat itself.
But it probably will.
Yeah, just sittin' back, wonderin' about Sam Tilden
the 19th Century Al Gore.
Well, the time slips away, leaves us with nothin', Mister
but fraud happened before.

R.B. Hayes, yeah, he'll pass on by.
R.B. Hayes, make the Democrats cry.
R.B. Hayes, R.B. Hay-ay-ay-ayes.
Yeah, he'll pass on by.
R.B. Hayes, make the Democrats cry.
R.B. Hayes, R.B. Hay-ay-ay-ayes.

That ain't right! Oh, no!
That ain't right! Come on now!
That ain't right! Oh, no!
That ain't right! Come on now!

All right, boys, keep on counting now!

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.2
How Funny: 4.2
Overall Rating: 4.2

Total Votes: 5

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
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 1
 
 2   0
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 0
 
 3   0
 0
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 4   0
 0
 0
 
 5   4
 4
 4
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Arwen - September 09, 2004 - Report this comment
I never thought that I would actually say this to another human being, Mr. Pacholek...but I'm starting to think that you are too smart for me.

5s, by the way...excellent choice in an original...gotta love Bruce...
Johnny D - September 09, 2004 - Report this comment
Wow, Michael, pretty cool stuff ...... the similarity between Hayes/Tilden and Bush/Gore reminds me of the freaky weird coincidences between the Lincoln and Kennedy assassinations. 5-5-5
alvin rhodes - September 09, 2004 - Report this comment
poor ol' RB...maybe a neglected president but he sure makes some good roast beef sandwiches....funy one...5s

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