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Song Parodies -> "Toys R'nt Us"

Original Song Title:

"Mamas, Don’t Let Your Babies Grow Up to Be Cowboys"

Original Performer:

Willie Nelson

Parody Song Title:

"Toys R'nt Us"

Parody Written by:

John Jenkins

The Lyrics

Wal-Mart is not the only company involved in the Chinese toy debacle, but it’s the most fun to spoof.
Wal-Mart ain’t easy to love, but it’s hard to resist.
You’d rather not shop there, but your budget insists.
Asian-made bargains are on all the toy shelves,
And kids always want something new.
The Hot Wheels have cooled off, and Big Bird’s got bird flu,
So what’s a poor mother to do?

Mamas, don’t let your babies have low-priced Chinese toys,
Don’t give them new toys made behind the Great Wall.
Give something safer, like a cannon ball.
Mamas, don’t let your babies have low-priced Chinese toys,
Consumers can now see, the Chinese GDP
Should be on total recall.

Wal-Mart sells cheap children’s products that come without warnings:
Stuff that they’re made of might turn your skin vivid Grinch green.
But Wal-Mart’s market share just keeps growing bigger
Thanks to their cross-marketing plan:
The more toy trucks they sell, the more prescriptions they fill.
And shareholders think green is keen.

Mamas, don’t let your babies have low-priced Chinese toys
The most skillful Chinese design engineers
Make Rolex knockoffs, not plastic toy gears.
Mamas, don’t let your babies have low-priced Chinese toys
That Barbie from Peking will quickly be breaking
And end up like Britney Spears.

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.6
How Funny: 4.6
Overall Rating: 4.4

Total Votes: 9

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   8

User Comments

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Wally Martinez - November 06, 2007 - Report this comment
Attention Walmart choppers. On aisle 5 we have the new low-lead-rider replicas of the original 1956 Chevies on sale for only $5.55. And Tang-you for chopping at Walmart. Doh-Weno-Tardi.
AFW - November 06, 2007 - Report this comment
Humerously and skillfully composed
John Barry - November 06, 2007 - Report this comment
Wal-Mart leads the way. Nice job.
Guy - November 06, 2007 - Report this comment
I see mi amigo Wally beat me to what I was going to say. Fine job here John. I'm for giving them a cannon ball as well. That was too funny.
MarthaDTox - November 06, 2007 - Report this comment
Excellent stuff John Walmart's toys go down like a lead balloon as they say over here in the UK Must check out the OS I haven't really listened to Willie Nelson much!
showtime - November 09, 2007 - Report this comment
Everything is great except one thing The song title....You need a better title But overall great job but you lost a point for the bad title
John Jenkins - November 09, 2007 - Report this comment
Valid criticism, showtime. I had planned to make "Mamas, Don’t let your Babies have Low-Priced Chinese Toys" the title, but it had about 7 characters too many for AmIRight. Actually, "Toys R'nt Us" was starting to grow on me; but since yours is the only comment pro or con, it appears that the cons win. Anyway, thanks for the constructive feedback, showtime.
mat hick - July 30, 2008 - Report this comment
got off beat a few times

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