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Song Parodies -> "Desperate Wingnut"

Original Song Title:


Original Performer:

The Eagles

Parody Song Title:

"Desperate Wingnut"

Parody Written by:

Michael Pacholek

The Lyrics

"Responsible parents do well to assume that all leftards at school are sexual predators until proved otherwise." -- Sarcastic Paranoid, "Maricons," 10/13/06. In case you didn't notice, you right-wing nut, Mark Foley is a Republican who spent the last 10 years pandering to the "Christian" "right." I think you're just upset that one of your own was "playing for the other team." Or is there more to it than that? This is dedicated to all those Republicans whose love, apparently, still dare not speak its name.
(piano intro)

Desperate wingnut.
Why don't you come to your senses.
You ain't mended no fences
for so long now.
Whoa, you're a hard one.
I know you've got your reasons.
I wonder what's pleasin' you?
It hurt you somehow?

Don't assume that queens are liberals, boy.
Some actually are rightward.
Those queens, their hearts, they're told must be repressed.
Now it seems to me you're claiming
that you're always looking skyward.
But perhaps, a bit too much, thou dost protest?

Desperate wingnut.
You ain't getting more popular.
Those blades toward the scapular
can't find their way home.
And freedom, whoa, freedom
that's not your side's monopoly.
Your side governs so sloppily
and you feel all alone.

Don't your heart get cold, not just wintertime?
Election Day, your results won't shine.
It's hard to tell straight Repubs from the gay.
Screwed up Iraq, economy.
Ain't it funny how you're on your knees
to play?

Desperate wingnut.
I guess you don't have no senses.
Broke back on your fences.
I'll count each -gate.
Straight man, you're feigning
but you're stuck in the closet.
Moral high ground, you've lost it.
(Not sure he ever had it!)
Moral high ground, you've lost it.

Soon it's two thousand...


(piano close)
Not that there's anything wrong with that!

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 2.7
How Funny: 2.7
Overall Rating: 2.7

Total Votes: 24

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   13
 2   1
 3   0
 4   0
 5   10

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

TJC - October 14, 2006 - Report this comment
I see Mr. 1's voted seven times, so like Fox News, I'll have to be fair and balanced...I think you've kept the atmospheric qualities of the original and made your point rather well (ie blades to the scapular). 5's!
111 - October 14, 2006 - Report this comment
Hey, I'm the first one here!

...or not!
Man-boy Monica - October 14, 2006 - Report this comment
"I did not have sex with Michael Pacholek!"

--Bill Clinton (we hope)
linda - October 14, 2006 - Report this comment
You'd think you'd have the pacing thing down by now, but I guess that (again) number of parodies is far better for your kingmanship than is pacing or really making sense.
Michael Pacholek - October 14, 2006 - Report this comment
Wow. I ain't never struck a right-wing nerve THIS hard before. Which means I was correct. Hey Linda: We don't believe in "kingmanship." That's your side. (Inherited thrones, King George I and King George II, and all that jazz.) Especially Mark Foley, a Republican Congressman who always pandered to the Bob Jones types before, but got caught telling Congressional pages, "Let's play checkers. Jump me! King me!" And "Man-boy": We were never better off than we were during the Clinton Presidency. But then, compared to Georgie Bush, Jimmy Carter looks like a good President. Even Daddy Bush looks in touch with reality by comparison. People should not be afraid of their governments, but I know one government that should definitely be afraid of its people. Freedom ForeVer.
malcolm higgins - October 14, 2006 - Report this comment
if voting was about preferences and political stripe, I'd give you ones.. but it is about theme, and talent.. 5-5-5 ouch..
linda - October 14, 2006 - Report this comment
Michael; You think my comment showed that you "struck a right-wing nerve -- hard"? LOL! !! ---- You give yourself way too much credit! --- ... Your pacing did suck, party affiliation aside. The parody was also juvenile (but that is not new w/ you)... With the "wingnut" name... I loved it! I am rather pleased by your parody and wasn't even one of those who gave it all ones either! --- I like how childish some of your anti-right songs are -- it shows a lot about the members in your party! So I guess you are wrong again -- Poor baby!
Linda - October 14, 2006 - Report this comment
Michael says: ""We were never better off than we were during the Clinton Presidency"" ------ --- Don’t be delusional Michael! Better off w/Clinton - how? â€" Our economy has not been this good in over 4 decades! Our unemployment average under Bush is lower than Clinton and is the best it has been while you have been alive. Our national average pay increase is the 2nd largest in history, second only to the year after world war one! We have the biggest excess income per capita than under any president. More homes have been purchased by far, (new buyers), than in any time in history, per capita. Bush had more closers and fines in his first two years than Clinton in his entire 8 years. Saddam is out of power, his sons are dead and not running around raping and killing and helping dad with his mass murders and burring folk alive. Top AQ folk are gone, Afghanistan has it’s country back again… All this and more despite the FACT Clinton left us in a recession 911 and the wars. Bush’s taxes on the rich are much higher than Clintons; Bush has no taxes and tax credits for the poor; and Clinton raised the taxes on the mid. class… Go figure! So as nice as it sounds to you to say that, you are being deceptive to others with your lack of real facts, (lack of facts period) and your empty propaganda. Now run off and do what demoncrats do well: kill babies, march for gay rights, back the man boy love association, fight for God to be taken out of our pledge and money and for all of us â€" fight for more taxes!
Michael Pacholek - October 15, 2006 - Report this comment
Linda, our economy stinks. Wages are down. It took the stock market almost six years to get back to its Clinton peak -- with inflation factored in, the Dow Jones should be at 13,200 right now, not its current shade under 12,000. The budget deficit is at a level that makes Reagan look like a pennypincher. Unemployment doesn't count the people who have given up looking for work (i.e. retired), and it certainly doesn't count the under-employed, which was much less a problem even under previous GOP Presidents. Excess income? Take out the top 1 percent and we have LESS income. Clinton raised taxes on the top 1.2 percent, nobody else, and it worked like gangbusters; Bush cut taxes on the top 1 percent, and jacked up the deficit at a rate that makes Reagan look like a wimp, resulting in lost jobs -- a net 2 million jobs in six years where population growth alone should have created about 8 million by now. That's a loss of money, and you can call it a tax hike if you like, but you're too blinded by partisanship to figure it out. Saddam being in power meant al-Qaeda was out of Iraq, Saddam being out of power means Americans are dying for nothing at the hands of al-Qaeda. Afghanistan does not have its country back -- functionally, Hamid Karzai is barely the Mayor of Kabul, and the Taliban are back on the march. Democrats kill babies? No, we don't. We try to get them better health care, and your kind stops us. March for gay rights? Why shouldn't they have the same rights as everyone else? It's equal rights, not special rights. Man-boy love? One more time: Mark Foley is a Christian-right pandering Republican. Take God out of... Let me get this straight: How can God be taken out of anything? Isn't He all-powerful? And, yes, we need higher taxes to pay for our security, Bush's war, saving Social Security and Medicare, and paying down the national debt. Only a damn fool would think otherwise. Really, Linda, just because you believe everything O'Reilly, Limbaugh, Hannity, Coulter and the rest tell you doesn't mean you NEED to compete with them for Keith Olbermann's "Worst Person In the World" prize on MSNBC's "Countdown."And the parody was great. I wish they were all this easy to write, but sometimes it takes your kind days to give me new material. Good night, and good grief.
Oprah - October 15, 2006 - Report this comment
Michael...Linda...get a room
The Facts Police - October 15, 2006 - Report this comment
Hey pps, I'd like to report an error in this parody, I'm sure the intro shuld read "Responsible parents do well to assume that all MINISTERS AND REPUBLICANS are sexual predators until proved otherwise".
Fitu Petaia - October 15, 2006 - Report this comment
Here is my parody of the ABC song called "My Computer Keyboard" QWERTYUIOP ASDFGHJKL ZXCVBN and M
Linda - October 15, 2006 - Report this comment
You may sound right to morons Michael, but I KNOW the truth. Ihave seen the records, not just blowhard left wing wacko sites. We are far better off than in Clinton's adminisration FAR BETTER. You re mistaken with the unempoyment records, excess income, tax increases, the economy, the home purchases - every single thing I wrote out is true. Now maybe you spend too much of your dull little life here - pretending to be "in the know" to actually "know" what is going on. But you are way off - no amount of smoke you blow up your pal's arses will change that. I am much smarter than you will ever be. And your pretense crap doesn't work ... PEOPLE - look it up.. you'll see Michael for the blowhard he really is!
Stephen Harrington - October 15, 2006 - Report this comment
555, I beg to differ myself(although I'm neither demo or repub). I don't see how we're better off now(well, maybe the oil companies are).
Jason - October 15, 2006 - Report this comment
Linda, why are you being so hard on Michael for? He has been a long-term established parody writer on AmIRight. And I have never had to fault any of his parodies. My fave parody by M.P is Mow Mow Mow Your Lawn (A parody of Row Row Row Your Boat)
Mr 1s - October 15, 2006 - Report this comment
I did NOT hand out my treasured 1s on this parody! Honest!
Michael Pacholek - October 15, 2006 - Report this comment
Linda, you can't HANDLE the truth! Pretense? I don't need any. Actually, "pretense" is what I feel before you post. "Post-tense" is what I feel after I've mopped the floor with your fascist lies. Jason: Poor Linda, she can't help it, she was born with a silver albatross around her neck. And "Oprah": The only room Linda needs to get is a rubber room! (Note to certain Amirighters AND YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE: That was NOT a sex joke!)
Linda - October 15, 2006 - Report this comment
Jason - simply read his comments to me on my parodies and I would be you could figure out the answer. I didn't give him all ones on all his songs, I like a few of them. I just think he is a blowhard and doesn't like free speech when it is not his, (typical democrat).
Seymour Butz - October 16, 2006 - Report this comment
Fitu is an idiot. He/she/it/sock needs to stop spamming this site.
Linda - October 16, 2006 - Report this comment
Michael - when faced with facts - calls names and acts like a two year old and whines childish crap... nice!
Jason - October 16, 2006 - Report this comment
Linda, why don't you set aside your differences and kiss and make up with Michael? You are feuding more than the members of The Beach Boys ever did! I have a suggestion. Why don't you collaborate with Michael and write a parody together?
Ravyn Rant - October 18, 2006 - Report this comment
Michael - another winner. 555. "Broke back on your fences, I'll watch each -gate" was my favorite line. What made me laugh even harder was Linda's taking a second from spewing that insane garbage to attack your PACING! Best laugh I had all day.
Michael Pacholek - October 19, 2006 - Report this comment
My pleasure. Quoth the Ravyn: "We'll put up with those wingnuts... NEVERMORE!"

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