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Song Parodies -> "The End Time"

Original Song Title:

"Close To You"

Original Performer:

The Carpenters

Parody Song Title:

"The End Time"

Parody Written by:

Barry J. Mitchel

The Lyrics

With natural disasters and human-caused atrocities clustering ever more closely on the calendar, prophets are predicting the world's end, and many believe them. Iran's President is preparing the way for the hidden 12th Imam, but the Bible cautions against crediting anyone claiming to know the time of Christ's return. [1] Current forecasts give the world either 3 or 23 remaining months. You may be a skeptic, but could be shaken if one of these apocalyptic events occurred close to you.
Why do fish flood on beaches drear [2]
At this time, the new year?
Could it be, not long we'll see
The End Time?

Why do birds fall down from the sky [2]
Without rhyme; can't they fly?
Should we flee? Stay? Strongly plea [3]
For End Time?

On last day, that final morn,
The angels brought together
From all sides, consolidated streaming queue. [4]
So they winked out moonlight
In Earth's air grown cold,
And sunlight in hued skies of blue. [5]

Satisfied, all not fallen down [6]
Follow fools who expound. [1]
Unlike me, they long to see
The End Time.
[1] Matthew 24:3-5 or Mark 13:3-6 or Luke 21:7-8
[2] Zephaniah 1:3
[3] Matthew 24:15-21 or Mark 13:14-19
[4] Matthew 24:31 or Mark 13:27
[5] Matthew 24:29 or Mark 13:24-25
[6] Those who expect a reward in the afterlife may not cling to Earthly life.

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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.0
How Funny: 4.2
Overall Rating: 4.2

Total Votes: 8

Voting Breakdown

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    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
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 3   0
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 5   6

User Comments

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Patrick - January 10, 2011 - Report this comment
I like this one. A mellow melody with apocalyptic lyrics. The prophecies I have read show the End Time being a rather lengthy period of travail, nothing that could be accomplished in only a few months. I like your references to floating fish and falling birds.
Barry J. Mitchel - January 10, 2011 - Report this comment
Thanks, Patrick. I could add to footnote 4 "The Rapture" from Revelation.
In line 14, "her" or "pure" is easier to sing than "hued".
I wrote this before the Tucson massacre, but that may be one more sign for believers.
AFW - January 10, 2011 - Report this comment
Kinda' scary, but well constructed..
Dana Mathewson - January 10, 2011 - Report this comment
Great, Barry. But darn it, now you're making me homesick for Karen Carpenter again (not this particular song, precisely, but others of hers). I'll never forget the first time I heard that "just cuddle with me" voice of hers... (sniff).
Patrick - January 10, 2011 - Report this comment
The other day I bought a movie DVD at a department store. The clerk asked my birthdate. Never happened before. Weird.
John Barry - January 10, 2011 - Report this comment
Nice end rhymes on end times.
Old Man Ribber - January 11, 2011 - Report this comment
BJM - Fantastic job. You have a formidable knowledge of scripture...and thanks for taking a poke at the Hal Lindsays of the world. My sign of the end times will be when the one bomber goes away. ;D
Mark Scotti - January 12, 2011 - Report this comment
Very profound.(YIKES, I think I just saw Damian over my shoulder....LOL!) 555 to the book of Metistophamitchel!!!
Barry J. Mitchel - January 13, 2011 - Report this comment
Patrick: That clerk asked your age because no young tech-savvy person (unlike me)would want a hard copy of anything available online!
John: Thanks; all of my rhymes match TOS except for "end times" and "moonlight".
OMR: Thanks; I must admit that I got the Zephaniah tip from Chris Hayes who was subbing for Rachel Maddow on MSNBC!
Mark: Thanks, but I doubt that the First Council of Nicaea would have accepted my book.

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