Baby you can write a song
but that ain't getting us nowhere.
I've told you everything I possible can.
There's nothing funny anywhere.

Baby, you can type all night
but that'll never change the way the song feels.
The votes really piling up on the site.
I wish you hadn't posted that song here.

I scored it true and I scored it right.
I tried to show you scoring good and fair.
I'm tired of words, I need to say good night
and you've been writing bad so long
I'm crying acid rain instead of tears!

And all I can do is keep on telling you
It's funny (It's funny)
yes, honey (yes, honey)
but there ain't no way you'll play it and make money
now, don't you jive.
(Don't you jive, 'cause)
A two and a three ain't five.
Now, don't you jive.
(Don't you jive, 'cause)
A two and a three ain't five.

You'll never find no gold from the girl named Royce.
You'll never get no fives from the Florio boys.
I know you're looking for a way to keep from going so wrong!
But there ain't no magic pill lying at the bottom of a Johnny D song!
(Not for that problem, anyway.)

I can't lie. I can't give you ratings you haven't earned!
No matter how you try
You'll never be able to write these ditties
ditties that just won't get you burned!

Well, there's only one girl that I will ever love
and that was so many songs ago.
And though I know I'll never get her out of my heart
she went to Michael Douglas, ooh, I know.

And I remember how she didn't like the songs I write.
She told me I should go back to bed.
And though I pleaded and I begged her, "Babe, I wanna get more"
she packed her phone and turned right away.

And she kept on telling me
she kept on telling me
she kept! on! telling me!

It's funny (It's funny)
yes, honey (yes, honey)
but there ain't no way you'll play it and make money
now, don't you jive.
(Don't you jive, 'cause)
A two and a three ain't five.

It's funny (It's funny)
yes, honey (yes, honey)
but there ain't no way you'll play it and make money
Now, don't you jive.
(Don't you jive, 'cause)
A two and a three ain't five.
Now, don't you jive.
(Don't you jive, 'cause)
A two and a three ain't...

Baby you can write a song
but that ain't getting us nowhere.