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Song Parodies -> "Kinkade"

Original Song Title:


Original Performer:

Eric Clapton

Parody Song Title:


Parody Written by:

John A. Barry

The Lyrics

A drug-addled lout; substances took him out: Kinkade
Wasn't by ethics bound, franchisees found, Kinkade

I won’t buy, I won’t buy, I won’t buy Kinkade

I don’t mind the hues, rather the maudlin views: Kinkade
Was factory-run; schlock churned by the ton: kitsch made

When my eyes see this guy’s stuff, I fly, sick made

It was all a con, but the con man is gone: Kinkade
Though he was a hack, he made a lot of jack: big paid

So, “goodbye” to the guy never dry: gin-swayed
“Painter [of] Light,” painting fright, painting blight: Kitschkade

Your Vote & Comment Counts

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 

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Voting Results

Pacing: 3.5
How Funny: 3.3
Overall Rating: 3.5

Total Votes: 10

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   3
 2   1
 3   0
 4   0
 5   6

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

JAB fan - November 08, 2013 - Report this comment
555 - comment withheld due to risk of inciting the critics
Ditto - November 08, 2013 - Report this comment
No vote- comment witheld due to risk of inciting the critics
W. Churchill - November 08, 2013 - Report this comment
As I once said: "It is better to be making the news than taking it; to be an actor rather than a critic."
Rob Arndt - November 08, 2013 - Report this comment
Hey JAB, I never liked Kinkade much either but my mom did! 555! I prefer photographic art and declassified photos of aircraft- you don't know how many people walk my hallway and say "WTF is that?" when they see my pics of the nuclear-ramjet powered Vought SLAM 1/3rd scale test model that was once the world's first worked on doomsday device. Other than those some nice Robert Doisneau pics make me happy (they are Kylie Minogue faves too)! Btw, sorry for the closed comments on my PoP X7 for today (Misspelled Venezuela 3 times in the preface too)! Everytime I open comments someone has to say something negative to continue verbal assaults and extend the comment box into a NG war thread. A waste of space and time. Seems that you are under attack too for numbers. That's a shame as AiR used to be fun place. IMHO the pacing police started the ruination, then the ratings system was compromised, many attacks by trolls followed, then making commentary w/o voting, and finally making personal attacks and continuous 1-bombing campaigns. Sad :(
Bill - November 08, 2013 - Report this comment
If the truth weren't so sad, this would be funny gone wild. Way to go! Critics be damned, it wasn't fire in his belly or his brush.
John Barry - November 08, 2013 - Report this comment
Sad indeed, Rob. But if you're gonna post here these days, gotta be philosophical and roll with the punches, IMO. I enjoy the challenge of the POP's and have a few other pieces in the works. But pretty soon I'm gonna roll on outta here again for a while.
Straight Talk - November 08, 2013 - Report this comment
Robert, the way I see it, the increase in 1s is mainly a response to the decrease in quality of the parodies. And you have been a one-man lowest common denominator. Just today, you submitted a trivial parody of a trivial parody of a trivial OS. Your parody consisted of 10 lines and 25 words. It was prefaced by your boast that it took seconds to write. To top it off, you insulated yourself by closing your comment box.
You insult the reader with your easy toss-offs and you deserve the 1s you got, and more. Yeah, "the ratings system was compromised," otherwise no honest person would give you all those unearned 5s.
Not another self-centered reply, no demanding to see my page, no blather about numbers, no dismissal of my relevance, and no criticism of my anonymity which many AIR members, including YOU, employ now as a matter of course, and which YOU have justified for its usefulness. NFR. I'm doing you a favor because every one of your comments is an exercise in bad judgment, brown-nosing, or both.
Rob Arndt - November 08, 2013 - Report this comment
It must be fun to tell it "straight" when one doesn't have the intestinal fortitude to sign their own name and present their own author page for direct comparisons. Yeah, I took Max Power's minimalist parody of a simplistic nature describing freezing and made a more complex version of Hitler seizing other nations. i took the mundane and made it morbid in seconds. This is just an easy numbers play and nothing more. If you like it, OK... if you don't, OK! Like JAB I have a massive author page of 2216 parodies of all genres and artists and lengths (minimal, short, medium , long, extended). There is no way that you have read all my 2216, so your statements about quality being lowered are bogus. i've seen the pacing police and artistry write very complex works and they gets 1s, 2s, 3s as well. Many people don't like their topics nor their styles, so get off your high horse Mr.X. I am established and write everyday what I feel like writing and just b/c it doesn't take me hours to write a long parody of a long song takes nothing away from my terminology nor style which can be witty, sarcastic, morbid, gross, humorous, or informative. And don't tell me that the artistry folks and the pacing police haven't written their own political and information parodies. Mr. Footnotes alone has quite a few... and yet still manages NOT to have a perfect 5 author page; in fact, no productive parodist here does except maybe someone that gets no votes and votes himself a 555!!! I have my hits and theya re fine for just being here 2.5 years, not 5-10!!! I laugh at the vets that think that they are superior and have 500 parodies in 8+ years. I reached 500 parodies in months!!! I am proud of my numbers, my topics, my style, my individuality, and my contributions to AiR. Hey, how many parodists in the top 10 are contributors as well that wrote 300 total submissions per month? I seem to have been the only one out of hundreds of authors here and still I am Number 4 Top Parodist of all time AND Number 6 Top Contributor of all time (#1 in 7 of 10 categories, including Fragments). I don't need to boast b/c my stats are empirically evident. How dumb can you be to keep generating commentary against me to no effect? I've been on forums where it took the entire group to fight me and we waged verbal war over 800 pages and I won (see RC Groups under Blonde Valkyrie). I have forced threads closed and decimated my opponents on the NGs. And yet am always busy working on new projects. I could hit you with my track record online with other productions but I don't wanna make you cry nor embarrass you. Stick to writing parodies and posting them instead of trying to turn the parody comment box into an open NG forum. You're not getting anywhere nor scoring any points. I think you just wanna see your comments in print- do you really need that for self-validation as a parodist???!!!
Investigative Journalist - November 09, 2013 - Report this comment
Dear Blonde Valkyrie: I found a picture of you.

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