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Song Parodies -> "Bennie’s Gonna Get"

Original Song Title:

"Bennie and the Jets"

Original Performer:

Elton John

Parody Song Title:

"Bennie’s Gonna Get"

Parody Written by:

John A. Barry

The Lyrics

Hey, did you hear about Ratzinger?
The road is what he’s hitting—
recently announced that zinger.
The top Cat. in the Vat takes flight,
won’t stick around.
Out he will clear, he’s got a new shtik;
no more bulls propound.

The hat is a goner; soon they’ll have to vet
all the old-man crowd, the n-n-next ones to inspect
and find a geezer pontiffable
but like Bennie, one who’s mean?
He’s a sclerotic coot with gold-threads suit;
his shoes were red. . .a Judy Garland sheen.
B-B-B-Bennie’s gonna get.

What will happen to the faithful?
They’ve been blindsided
by Bennie, who’s wraithful.
He says, “Goodbye” and is gonna get along.
New Habemus Papam will have to greet
the teeming St. Peter’s throng.

The Pater’s a goner; they’ll have to select
from the old-man crowd n-n-next one for the sect;
find ’em a geezer pontiffable,
a heavenly go-between.
A new gerontic coot with gold-threads suit
who then will head a billion that have seen:
B-B-B-Bennie’s gonna get.

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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 6

Voting Breakdown

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    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   6

User Comments

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Michael Pacholek - February 12, 2013 - Report this comment
I figured there would be a bunch of Pope Quits parodies -- mine will have to wait until tomorrow to be posted, due to technical difficulties on my end -- but I don't think they'll top this.
Rob Arndt - February 12, 2013 - Report this comment
How dare you insult His Holiness, 555 Hail Marys!!! Also, Ratzinger could always get a new job, his resume includes digging AT ditches and helping with a Flak Batterie :)
TJC - February 12, 2013 - Report this comment
Holy Habeus Papam, JB—the holy enchilada was transubstanciatingly great but I especially dug: '...he's a sclerotic coot with a gold-threads suit' and 'top Cat. in the Vat'!
Timmy - February 12, 2013 - Report this comment
F-F-F-Fives for this one - another good holy story today
Old Man Ribber - February 12, 2013 - Report this comment
JAB - As usual, you say it best. We all missed a splendid opportunity during the Benedict XVI Papacy. As he was born Johannes Ratzinger, what hasn't someone told his story to the Lady Gaga hit? We could have titled it..."Papa Ratzi"! ;D
Old Man Ribber - February 12, 2013 - Report this comment
And you know it's me because I had an error even in my comment! lol ;D

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