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Song Parodies -> "Where's She Hide Ten-Pin? (A Course For Males Only)"

Original Song Title:

"Where Do I Begin (Theme from 'Love Story')"

Original Performer:

Andy Williams

Parody Song Title:

"Where's She Hide Ten-Pin? (A Course For Males Only)"

Parody Written by:

Tommy Turtle

The Lyrics

Where's she hide ten-pin?
To most men: maidens made in madd'ning mystery
It's not a question that, so difficult, should be
It lies beneath the "heart": a part: anatomy
Where is that "part"?

Where's it, down below?
Since Hustler™ gave a road map many years ago
With photos graphic, a direct "root", do they show
It ought to be a thing that ev'ry man should know
Well, here's a start: --

-- Tulips, apart!
A very special thing, 'neath angel's thong
For wild riding flings, above the whole
For making love. It's gently, there, you go
Know this thing, only:
Treat her all wrong
And you'll be lonely
Just reach: Promised Land
And you'll be there

How long can you last?
Can love be measured by the hours that you play?
They have a new drug: 'sposed to help you with delay [1]
Just like Joe Biden's speeches: lasting night and day
Come up: fresh air

Go slow, not half-fast
Think Tantric thoughts to keep erotic ones at bay
Or think, instead, it's Nan Pelosi whom you lay
A manly stud you'll be, and win her love, I say
And she'll get there!

[1] They just released it a few weeks ago. They weren't going to release it until next week, but they got so excited ...

Hustler ® Larry Flint Publications. Couldn't find a SFW copyright page (despite trying ;), so no link.

This Pubic Service Announcement and educational message brought to you by, and © 2010, Tommy Turtle. All rights reserved. E-mail:

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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.8
How Funny: 4.0
Overall Rating: 4.5

Total Votes: 4

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   1
 5   3

User Comments

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Mark Scotti - July 01, 2010 - Report this comment
Strike!! LOL....That's a!!!
AFW - July 01, 2010 - Report this comment
I stroll sort of "Middle of the Road", so I'm more of a five-pin kind of guy.. (: but seriously, this is a hole new take on feminine anatomy, in my book, anyway. Gotta' love that Joe Biden speech line...
Brunswicked™ - July 01, 2010 - Report this comment
Your stroll down yesterday's 'Memory Lame' to today's 'Mammary Lain' has bowled me over! With this 'gutter', er, 'ball'! You spared no lexpense, managing to 'pull off' multiple 6 - 9 combos to achieve this perfect 300 TanTrick hat-trick!
Tommy Turtle - July 02, 2010 - Report this comment
Mark Scotti: And who among the PBA tour has a 277.5 average? :) Thanks!

AFW: Everyone except ol' Joe himself, perhaps :) thanks for v/c.

Brunswicked™: And let's not forget making the ol' 7-10 split! :) thanks for v/c, and does this make TT a better bowler than Obama? :D
Guy - July 02, 2010 - Report this comment
I'm not quite sure exactly what my oPINion is on this. Wow this is like a ten pin in a G-spot. Well did.
Tommy Turtle - July 05, 2010 - Report this comment
Guy: Thanks for your "on-the-spot" comment!
NorCALvotress - July 06, 2010 - Report this comment
SeniorTaTA . . . see ChiTenPen at HoFu buy loto Ryce
TT - July 06, 2010 - Report this comment
NorCALvotress: Anything you say, dear .... thanks for the Zen comment.

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