I spritz all day,
And my pee can spark distemper.
I scram from home,
Grazing on a big bone; rude, I don’t eat slow,
Leaving freshly fallen piles that hounds bestow.

I am a dog,
My am a Fido.

I lick balls;
This gorge fest seems unsightly.
With tongue I levitate.
I do not heed “best friend” shtik;
Trench licks, my domain—
An ass slurp’s what I love—more than lo mein

I am a dog,
I dump a pile o’.

A flock of doves:
I have scourged these birds before;
They’re fleeing from my dentistry.
I will disturb a stunned bird by eating its insides.
It’s a feathered lunch; the feckless ones ain’t flied.

I am a dog,
I am a-dining.

I halve fine books;
One of poetry I’m bisecting.
I am stealing from the farmer.
Biting Mr. Broom, mailman who can’t zoom. . .
I clutch those buns; in those buns, sunk my teeth.

I am a dog,
I am a-biting.

And I drop fecal banes
That make rhinal [s]centers cry.