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Song Parodies -> "Bad Swiss"

Original Song Title:

"Last Kiss"

Original Performer:

J. Frank Wilson

Parody Song Title:

"Bad Swiss"

Parody Written by:

John A. Barry

The Lyrics

Well, where oh where can the takings be?
All stored where we can never see.
They’re not SS men, but they simply aren’t good,
And yet they plead their “neutral” case to all the world.

It was back in the day, the Second World War—
They knew how they could make a score.
There could be dough, make some bread;
The Vater called, and here’s what they said:
We got some gold, and it is shiny bright;
To sell it will help our finance plight.
Turned a blind eyes and bussed some ass—
The gainful team grabbed the gelt fast.

So spare the game of “neutrality.”
These whores cooked books for the Nazis.
They’re not SS men, but they simply aren’t good,
And still they peddle “neutral” shtik to all the world.

Tills were filling up from storing pounds and pounds
Of gold stolen, even molar crowns.
We’re since warned: we can’t believe their lies—
What goes on in all those bank vaults at night?
They’d take from dead the bullion that was bled
From the corpses. . .just a little vile.
I hold my nose at fibs of the bad Swiss.
I’ll never forget whose butts they did kiss.
It’s all a con—oh, they’re neutral; they won’t fight. . .
Except bringing bad deeds to light.

So spare the claims of “neutrality”—
It’s more cooked up than fakery.
They’re not SS men, but they treated ’em good,
And still they scheme; and gain from the worst of the world.

federatio Geltvetica…………….

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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 5

Voting Breakdown

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    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
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 4   0
 5   5

User Comments

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Patrick - November 16, 2010 - Report this comment
A right-wing gun nut shouldn't be saying this, but Swiss financial privacy is what really saved the country from invasion, not a rifle in every cottage. Both sides needed a place to launder money and spy on one another without the risks of being shot. Astute Nazis knew the war could be lost and hedged their bets by stashing ill-gotten gains where they could reach it after the war.
Old Man Ribber - November 16, 2010 - Report this comment
Forget chocolate, watches, and cheese! The gnomes of Zurich often were the Reich's bankers. Great expose! ;D
LilCoogarClaws - November 16, 2010 - Report this comment
I believer the WarBergs were the moneybags for the Reich . . . BrotherSludge !
John Barry - November 16, 2010 - Report this comment
Danke, merçi, grazie, and however you say "thanks" in Romansch.
P Pete - November 16, 2010 - Report this comment
No holes in this parody. Finely flavored.
Mark Scotti - November 17, 2010 - Report this comment
Here's $555 to hide in the bank account!!!

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