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Song Parodies -> "Drac's Kiss"

Original Song Title:

"Last Kiss"

Original Performer:

J. Frank Wilson

Parody Song Title:

"Drac's Kiss"

Parody Written by:

John A. Barry

The Lyrics

[protracted howling]

Hell! Where oh where have I taken me?
This Ford’s shakin’ amazingly.
“Must be a lemon,” I say. “It’s no damn good!”
I think I’ve been forsaken by the Detroit world.

I was out, met my fate. . .was damnably dark.
My car broke down; I had to park.
There in the road, straight ahead:
Startled, appalled, I’d met the undead.
I couldn’t stop, no, his scurrilous bite;
I’ll never forget the wound that night.
As I expired, a gust from ass. . .
His painful scream: “That’s vile cursed gas!”

Well, where oh where can veins’ basting be?
He gored, took it away from me.
I’m an undead one; guy had glugged down my blood
He took from me veins’ basting, what a thieving churl!

Swell! When I woke up, my brain was on the ground;
There were creepy people all around.
Something warm running in my eyes—
“Yum! It’s so tasty!” said the guy with delight.
I raised my head, replaced my brain and said:
“Ogre’s snarling, and his spittle’s vile!”
He’d held me close and swigged—mean mouth, Drac’s kiss;
He’d downed my blood; situation is this:
My crown back on, I’ll go boldly in the night
To glom that stuff that’s rife with life.

My fare O fare is veins’ basting sweet.
I gorge, take it, so don’t entreat.
I’m an undead one; now I glug others’ blood.
Cold night, go bite, slow-drain; days’ domain: underworld.

Yummmmmmmmmmmmm!

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 LittleLots
Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 9

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 0
 0
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   0
 0
 0
 
 5   9
 9
 9
 

User Comments

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Christie Marie M - October 19, 2009 - Report this comment
It took a lot of guts and gory to write this, John! I take it you're into Halloween lately! I understand you'll be doing Halloween satires for this month! That's situation's gotta be scary, especially with your encounter with a vamp! Sink your teeth into those 5's!
Patrick - October 19, 2009 - Report this comment
Vivid, blood-curdling imagery. Reminds me of some local zombie videos I once saw. What ever happened to Todd Sheets?
Leo Keough - October 19, 2009 - Report this comment
Bloody good job on this one!!!...555!!!
littleCUPcakes - October 19, 2009 - Report this comment
. . . how I love a passionate Gent ! Oh, duke oForge Ahead ! ! . . . alias SirSweaty
MadameDeSeville - October 19, 2009 - Report this comment
Don't worry, ~BarryDearest~ . . . what happens in Milpitas(FORD plant) stays in Milpitas, Sir !
John Barry - October 19, 2009 - Report this comment
Christie: Yes, at least one a day for the month. Thanks.

Patrick: Thanks, but I'm embarrassed to say: I've never heard of Todd Sheets. . .will look him up.

Leo: Many thanks.

Cakes/Madame: Thanks, as always.
John Jenkins - October 19, 2009 - Report this comment
Drac seems to have picked a bad time to relocate from Transylvania to Detroit. One more soulless bloodsucker. Well done, John.

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