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Song Parodies -> "That’s Hutaree"

Original Song Title:

"That's Amore"

Original Performer:

Dean Martin

Parody Song Title:

"That’s Hutaree"

Parody Written by:

John A. Barry

The Lyrics

According to news reports: Hutaree says on its Web site its name means “Christian warrior” in a secret language few are privileged to know. Hutaree founder David Stone, who was known as “Captain Hutaree,” organized it in paramilitary fashion and members were assigned secret names, prosecutors said. Ranks ranged from “radoks” to “gunners,” according to the group's Web site.

With a little lexical legwork, I’ve been able to crack the secret language.
The Master Race is governing
When void’s the world. Here, what we say:

Wend to room in the sky; fires on sick earth; heathen fry,
Says Hutaree.
But until the end times, write an argot for rhymes,
Called “Hutaree.”
Meld our lingo for King of Kings, sling-gun Kings who brings
Gats and things. . .casus belli.[1]
Harmful fray as the tippies[2] spray, ripping lips away.
Reich’s 12-gauge target, hellies.[3]

When the Cards[4] make you yool[5]
Just like a Natzpa[6] Farule,[7]
That’s Hutaree.
It’s a language discreet for a crowd that will skeet,[8]
Scourge, and skuv.[9]
When you walk with this team, slap a Glock on your feme. . .[10]
No-poofs army.
Lose the Hebes, kick butt. . .Weebs,[11]
Like those old Natzarebes,[12]
Who’s Who Aree.[13]

Wets, wogs, coons, all must fry, Kikes ofved[13a]: big nix-peace Yahwy,[13b]
Per Hutaree.
(While we smile, Stone we heil, we’re beguiled by his bile,
“Cap. Hutaree.”)
A white world is our himeland[14]; we wait for end time and
Doom’s ferry.[15]
Melting things when the six-six-six thing brings a fictive king
We should string—cast,[16] high yeller.[17]
Darkey Dei, big-lipped ni**er—gray,[18] in pit spitted, flay.
Fly away targed[19] ’men, [20] fellers.

’cause we spark up the Yules,
We like Father’s son, who rules
For Hutaree.
He will bash the Discretins[21], a crowd Silk[22] will greet
In the GUV.[23]
Yes, our radoks[24] lead teams of gunners whose wet dream
Is Houvre[ 25] carry.
Screw you, Beebz[26] and the Bebes[27]
Like we, though, gnash-teeth Teabs.[28]

All too scary.

[1]justification for acts of war (Latin)
[2]hollow-tipped bullets
[3]those destined to eternal damnation
[4]card-carrying liberals
[5] scream, from “ululate”
[6]transliterated portmanteau combining “Nazi” and “papa”
[7]bilingual transliterated portmanteau: “Vaterland” and “rule”
[8]shoot, from skeet shooting
[9]governing by skewering, literally, opponents
[12]Nazis of regal blood
[13a]offed in a oven
[13b]Yahweh, alternate spelling
[15]reference to Charon ferrying damned souls to the underworld
[16]double meaning: “cast,” as in color; and a variant spelling of “caste”
[17]high yellow, a light-skinned black person
[19]chosen, from “targeted”
[20]women. Because the Hutaree are a patriarchal Klan, females are secondary in rank. The apostrophe indicates that they are missing something (one need not say what) and are thus less than men.
[21]from “Dis,” a god of the underworld
[22]Satan’s ilk
[23]Godless Underworld Venue
[24]from Nadsat “rasoodock,” “mind”—the idea being that someone with some intelligence leads the drone-like gunners. Nadsat is the argot of the violence-loving “droogs” in “Clockwork Orange.”
[25]open. A single-syllable mashup moniker derived from French “ouvert,” open (infinitive “ouvrir”), and the reactionary Hoover Institution, advocate of “open carry” laws.
[27]Believers in Baal, one of the seven princes of the underworld
[28]teabaggers—Tea Party acolytes, that is

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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 6

Voting Breakdown

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 5   6

User Comments

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Christie Marie M - March 31, 2010 - Report this comment
I'll just echo TJC's comment from yesterday on the same subject: Dino's hanging out with the wrong crowd! I also loved the way you added those footnotes in your satire. Hope TT reads your parody soon, wherever he is. You sure put up a good fight with this one! Once again, purifying you with 555's and may all conducts of violence be eliminated!
Patrick - March 31, 2010 - Report this comment
Quite an achievement, creating your own language so you can write a song in it. But, imagine for a moment that the federal government would strictly confine its activities to the very few authorized by the Constitution, just how much of this divisiveness and rancor in our country would still exist. I can take a much more broad minded view of other peoples cultures and life style choices if I am not robbed by the feds to pay for them.
Old Man Ribber - March 31, 2010 - Report this comment
Wonderful concept brought to fruition. Keep it coming and we'll "Barry" the lot of them! ;D
Mark Scotti - March 31, 2010 - Report this comment
Need 555 more "check and balances"!!!
John Barry - March 31, 2010 - Report this comment
Oops, "sling-gun kings" should be singular.

Christie: Yes, Dino's got to take a break.

Patrick: Many thanks.

OMR: OK, and thanks!

Mark: Check.
Jeff Reuben - March 31, 2010 - Report this comment
Headed by Jabba the Hutaree...yikes!
Michael Pacholek - March 31, 2010 - Report this comment
You played Hutaree all night, and while your thumbs may be sore, you can soothe them with a five.
Barry J. Mitchel - April 02, 2010 - Report this comment
If the 9 Hut's are found guilty, reading this daily would be suitable punishment. They'd prefer 100 yards of barbed wire in a swamp. But since TOS also used more than one language, I must award a Roman DLV.

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