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Song Parodies -> "Polari"

Original Song Title:


Original Performer:

Dean Martin

Parody Song Title:


Parody Written by:

John A. Barry

The Lyrics

Polari: so so[1]
Camp[2] parley
Troll,[3] ogles,[3a] cove[3b]
I try at rhyming the sounds
A maddening task that rebounds
I find crimper, palone[4]. . .not too many long O words
It puts such demands on the mind
I’m aggrieved by confusion
Thus nishta[5] effusion you’ll find
Nutty words such as metzas[6]
May drive me to veras [7] till blind

Polari, oh-oh!
Hey, can’t find me no mo’ long O
Got hoofer[8] and kaffies[8a]—the things
That keep the cartso[9] from swings
OK, so there’s cartso, with a long O; also there’s bold[10]
Look, there’s alamo[11], which don’t mean the Texas fort of old
You’d think a lingua franca based on Italiano
Would have users who’d have taken greater pains to leave intact the damn O

Polari, go, go!
Want no barney[12], no, no, no, no!
Up high on the stimps[13] are thews[13a]
Do you, like me, like great big jubes?[14]
I also like it when the riah[15] isn’t a shyker[16] or switch[16a]
But has got a great big zhoosh[17]
Love lallies,[18] lallie tappers,[18a] and luppers[18b]
Would love to get martinis[19] on a big caboose
But since I don’t have bonaroo[20] luck
I’ll probably get nanti[21]

Polari, no, no!
So, buvare[22], Rhône, Rhône, Rhône, Rhône
No wonder my happy heart sings
I’ve wandered from Polari-ings
Nell,[23] blue,[23a] dish,[23b] bibi,[23c] bijou[23d]
Bungery[24], I’ll go for a brew

[3] to walk about looking for trade
[11]hot for someone
[16], [16a] wig
[17]style hair/mince
[22]a drink

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 5

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   5

User Comments

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Patrick - March 25, 2010 - Report this comment
Multajn dankojn pro lingva leciono. Jidtala? Kie trovis vi tiam de nebone konataj vortoj?
Phil Nelson - March 25, 2010 - Report this comment
Interesting and innovative. Lots of obscure words! Watch out for 555 animalcules
John Barry - March 25, 2010 - Report this comment
Wow, Patrick, this may be the first use of Esperanto on the site. I got the first sentence. Had some help with the last. But, Jidtala? I'd heard of Polari--as with any parody empolying non-English lingo, just grab a dictionary and go wild.

Thanks, Phil, just shedding the last vestiges of an attack by some.
Phil Nelson - March 25, 2010 - Report this comment
Sorry, didn't mean for that to sound bad.
Old Man Ribber - March 25, 2010 - Report this comment
Wonderful! I actually knew some of these words! ;D
LilOhTweet - March 25, 2010 - Report this comment
PirateJacques de GrandBeavre, ~ ~ ~ ~ > NO . . . MO . . . `0h '
TJC - March 25, 2010 - Report this comment
Brilliant word play JAB. Five-ooooo long enough 'o' for ya?!

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