Curls, what I want in my hairpiece,
The hairpiece that I use to hide
My bald top that's so smooth, girl,
Well it's not appealing;
It's a mean ruff that I did buy;
It stays on tight, and it won't slide;
I might take a little off the side.

Gotta get it straight
Up there on top of my pate,
Looks like armorplate;
With curls, it'll look great.

You gotta help me, girl,
Help me curl,
'Cause I'm blowin' my mane.

Oh, I need someone who can work stylishly
On Trump trompe l'oeil,* make a realistic curl.

Oh help me, girl,
With my hairpiece,
Help me curl.
I need your touch on this Trump pate-pad--
Help me curl toupee.


*visual deception