Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh

In the store, inside invitin' packaging
To bring more pain you won't see comin'
A broken toy that you can't make better
All it is is litter
What's at fault ain't the violent play of children
Will just fall right apart at any stress you're givin'
Innate in the construction is the fast doom
Zero warnin' starin' at you (ah-ah-ah-ah, ah, ah)

Makin' a mess that's such a hassle
'Cause it's not in just two pieces, see
It's like the beads inside a rattle
And sometimes finer than that, don't you breathe
'Cause they had to use gold plastic, somethin' 'bout it's super weak
Can't wave it off as battle damage, too structural, geez
That toy's no longer standin', a pile of parts so bleak
'Cause they had to use gold plastic, now a refund is what I need

But don't fear, can see your brain is grinding
You think back 'bout what you've been buying
What will work and what's simply gonna break
From just a weird look from your face, ahh
But not all that's golden is a danger
Just some forms will make your toy a birthday breaker
Look for swirls, they tend to mark out doom
Where half the toy's set for vacuums (ah-ah-ah-ah, ah, ah)

So weird to see a toy so fragile
That the slightest stress breaks them with ease
When each play session is a raffle
With odds far smaller than fish climbin' trees
'Cause they had to use gold plastic when they know that kids pre-teen
Have made it their mission to handle toys non-carefully
And once they've started smashin' (yeah), ain't gonna stop, you see
'Cause they had to use gold plastic, now a refund is owed to me

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh (oh-oh-oh)
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh (it's a problem that's hard to see)
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh (unless you're a big dork like me)
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh
Toys facin' mad cracks?
Collectors mad at that
Pictures of damage
From that gold plastic (that damn gold plastic), ah-ah-ah-ah, ah, ah

Oh-oh, the company who manufactures
All the toys for both your kids and me
Have said they've taken steps to tackle (oh-oh-oh-oh, oh)
The problem and, in fact, it's history
But I would rather be a hassle (hassle)
And let strangers know how things could be (yeah-heah-eah)
I could get punched, I could get tackled (oh)
It's worth it for preventin' misery
'Cause they had to use gold plastic (oh, oh, oh, oh, oh), if you've seen the things I've seen
Heartbreak from the horrible damage (oh, oh, oh, oh, oh) to toys so pricey
Do the research to manage (oh, oh, oh, oh, oh) any faults you might see
'Cause they had to use gold plastic (oh, oh, oh, oh, oh) and a refund is what you'll need