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Song Parodies -> "How You'll Get the Nurse"

Original Song Title:

"How You Get the Girl"

Original Performer:

Taylor Swift

Parody Song Title:

"How You'll Get the Nurse"

Parody Written by:

the_conqueror_of_parodies

The Lyrics

Playing up one's injuries to mack on the hospital staff. You know, some kind of a hole!
Oh, oh, oh
Oh, oh, oh, oh-oh, oh-oh
Oh-oh, oh-oh

Lyin' there, you're post-surgery, there's pain, pain
And if not, there's a score of lies stored in your brain, brain
You're okay to (oh, oh, oh) make shit up (oh, oh, oh, oh-oh, oh-oh)
Oh-oh, oh-oh
Cause that's the only way (oh, oh, oh)
To get a private talk, talk (oh, oh, oh, oh-oh, oh-oh)
Oh-oh, oh-oh
Sure that's how that works?
That's how you'll get the nurse
And so you say:

"Oh my god, it's not gettin' better
Leg's in pain, my liver, whatever
My poor heart needs puttin' back together
And your face is the one cure, linger"
Claim that's how it works
That's how you'll get the nurse, nurse (oh-oh-oh-oh-oh)
Sure that's how that works?
That's how you'll get the nurse, nurse

Know for a fact you're not that weak, weak, yeah-ee-yeah
But now you act frail to hit on that peach, peach
I can get she may seem (oh, oh, oh) awful nice (oh, oh, oh, oh-oh, oh-oh)
Oh-oh, oh-oh (ooh-ooh-ooh)
But it's her job to, you know (oh, oh, oh)
Her pay demands a smile, smile (oh, oh, oh, oh-oh, oh-oh)
Oh-oh, oh-oh
Don't know how things work
Please don't accost the nurse
But still you say:

"Ow, my arse is not gettin' better
Lung's in pain, my fingers, whatever (friggin' whatever)
Busted heart might get put back together
When you place yourself there, please linger (stay there and linger)"
Claim that's how it works
That's how you'll get the nurse, nurse (oh-oh-oh-oh-oh)
No, not how that works
Not how you'll get the nurse, nurse
Yeah-ee-yeah-eah
Don't you know (oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh)
Oh, oh-oh-oh-oh, oh-oh-oh-oh (oh-oh, oh-oh, oh-oh, oh-oh)
That she just wants you (oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh)
To go (oh-oh, oh-oh, oh-oh, oh-oh)?

It's possible your wound last week
Not bad enough to need surgery
That's just my theory (yeah-eah-eah, yeah-eah-eah-eah)
Shut up, don't say:

"Oh my god, spleen's not gettin' better (not gettin' better)
Throat's in pain, intestines, whatever (friggin' whatever)
Pain-filled heart is gluin' back together
When your face is there, so please linger (I need you to stay here and linger)"
Dude, that just won't work
Not how you'll get the nurse, nurse (oh, oh-oh-oh-oh)
Oh-oh-oh-oh (that just won't work)
Asshole, that won't work
Not how you'll get the nurse (get the nurse), nurse (oh, oh-oh-oh-oh)
Oh-oh-oh-oh (that just won't work)
Douchebag, that won't work (oh-oh)
Not how you'll get the nurse (oh-oh), nurse (oh, oh-oh-oh-oh)
Oh-oh-oh-oh
Creepo, that won't work
Not how you'll get the nurse, nurse (oh, oh-oh-oh-oh)
Oh-oh-oh-oh

Know it won't work
Because I got the nurse

Same rule goes for anyone in customer service: they're paid to be friendly, it doesn't mean they want the D, 'kay?

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Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 1

Voting Breakdown

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