You know that two types of lyrics are out there
Ones that are clean and ones
You cannot say on air
Well just because we're all polite in the south
Don't mean I ain't got
A potty mouth

When I play lotteries
And don't win squat
When I touch oven burners
And they're still hot
When I drive on the road

I will shout obscenities if you're in my lane
In front of me and you slam on your brakes
Or steal my parking spot, you will feel my road rage
"You effin a-hole! D-bag! Bastard! You're lame!"

On a road trip, and I'm cut off by a dip
I'm screaming curses
Shite I feel so dumb, hammered nails into my thumb
I'm screaming curses
Don't stand there teasing me,
Taunting me, you can bite me, F-U!
When you act like a turd, gonna flip you the bird
And shout some curses

Report was done I was filled with pride
But just before I saved
My computer died
So sorry, it looks like my hard drive's fried
Chucked out the window
And I cried

When on the gym treadmill
I always trip
Bust up my head and elbow
My pants get ripped
Put on a TV show

I watch some basketball and the ref calls a block
"CHARGE REF! Damn you must be blind! What a crock!"
You think I should calm down, but I don't give a flock
"That call was B-S, that ref can suck my cork!"

I'm on a date, I show up three hours late
She's yelling curses
When I try to flirt, spill my beverage down her shirt
She's screaming curses
"YOU TOOL YOU RUINED MY
BRAND NEW BLOUSE, GET LOST YOU P-O-S!"
Hoped to get her in bed, she poured drinks on my head
And yelled some curses:

"Eat me!"
"What the eff you gonna do?"
"You S-O-B!" (She's yelling curses)
"Jerk, go to hell!" (yelling curses)

Stung by a bee, covered with poison ivy
I'm yelling curses
When an angry putz, snaps and kicks me in the nuts
I'm screaming curses
Don't stand there watching and
Laughing, get me some ice for down low
When I'm stupid and drunk, acting like a damn punk
I'm screaming curses

My fridge is bare, because you ate the last pear
I'm yelling curses
Big game is in doubt, that's when the power goes out
I'm screaming curses
Sick of my whining and
Bitching, ass, you know where you can go
If you don't like my puns, and you vote me all ones
I'll give you curses