Misheard lyrics (also called mondegreens) occur when people misunderstand the lyrics in a song. These are NOT intentional rephrasing of lyrics, which is called parody.
For more information about the misheard lyrics available on this site, please read our FAQ.
This page contains a list of the songs that have stories about their misheard lyrics submitted.
Song names are sorted by first letter, excluding A and The. This is sorted by song title only, not
by song title and performer. So if two different performers preformed the same song, you'll see
misheard lyrics for both on the same page (provided the song title was spelt the same both times, and
misheard lyrics have been submitted for both!).
1984 album at Amazon.com
I have a loose lady.
I heard the news, baby.
The Story: Yes - have thought that was what it was until a month ago when I heard Hagar sing it. - Submitted by: Richie
Have you seen Junior's grave?
Have you seen Junior's grades?
The Story: I thought David Lee Roth was asking about Junior's grave because Junior had killed himself and everyone should be ashamed that his grave wasn't well-tended. Whatever. I'm an idiot! - Submitted by: Kate Garrenson
Abusing Junior's Grades
Have you seen Junior's grades?
The Story: I've been listening to Van Halen for 30 years and today I was listening to "Women and Children First" and went ahead and posted "Abusing Junior's Grades" on Facebook as my status only to have a friend correct me. I re-listened closely, It was like hearing to the song for the first time again... - Submitted by: Martin Fernandez
And the cradle will rock
Yes the cradle, the cradle will rock
And I say lockjaw
And the cradle will rock
Yes the cradle, the cradle will rock
And I say rock on
The Story: I was chatting with my husband, asking him if he could remember any old Van Halen songs, when he belted out this misheard chorus. I thought it was funny, and wondered what on earth lockjaw had to do with teen angst.... - Submitted by: Karen Stanley Grigg
And when some hopeless kid skids down
They want to drum it but they found
They say we seen you naked boy
Naked boy
And when some local kid gets down
They try and drum him out of town
They say, 'You coulda least faked it, boy.'
Faked it boy
The Story: The cause was buying a cassette tape from a friend who copied it from a Van Halen tape that had been played 5,000 times before he dubbed a copy for me for a dollar. It wasn't MP3's back in the '80s kids! It ALL sounded like amps being dragged through mud. - Submitted by: azchurch
And when some local kid gets down
They try and drum him out of town
They say, 'You coulda least been a Phaedra, boy. Phaedra boy.'
And when some local kid gets down
They try and drum him out of town
They say, 'You coulda least faked it, boy.'
Faked it boy
The Story: Phaedra is from Lee Hazelwood's Some Velvet morning. - Submitted by: Del
Have you seen her? Some kinda pretty
Have you seen her? So fine and pretty
The Story: Either way, song that was playing when I met my wife of 16 years. - Submitted by: mr
You can't get a medic on a subway line.
You can't get romantic on a subway line.
The Story: What I thought until I found a video with the lyrics - Submitted by: e
Make your d*** so hard.
Making things so hard
The Story: I actually thought this song was about 'getting it up', rather than about not letting things get you down. Oops. - Submitted by: Ab
Got it made, got it made, got it made
I rocked the teacher.
I've got it bad, got it bad, got it bad
I'm hot for teacher.
The Story: I bet a co-worker five bucks and lost it. Dang! - Submitted by: Nate
I brought my pants home. Gimme somethin' to ride on
I brought my pencil. GImme somethin' to write on
The Story: Always thought they sang that on purpose - Submitted by: aapje
I got it made, got it made, got it made
I'm Arthur Treacher.
I've got it bad Got it bad Got it bad I'm hot for teacher
The Story: Arthur Treacher's was a fast food fish restaurant. - Submitted by: Andy
I think the clock is slow. I don't feel thirty.
I think the clock is slow. I don't feel tardy.
The Story: It would make some sense. The band members were about 30 years old when the song came out, and it's about looking back to their youth. - Submitted by: Dave Schulz
I've got it made
Got it made
Got it made.
I've got it bad
Got it bad
Got it bad.
The Story: I used to be a dancer at this place called Teaser's Palace. I worked there with a bunch of girls, one who was really stuck on herself in the worst way. I used to have to get ready with her in the dressing room. Whenever I heard her sing this song wrong, I wanted to choke her. - Submitted by: Cara Croft
An awful teacher
I'm hot for teacher
The Story: In memory of Eddie Van Halen (1955-2020) - Submitted by: Cody Finke
I got one hot banana pop, Dixie cups, all flavors and push-ups too.
I got puddin' pie banana, Dixie Cups All flavors, and push-ups, too.
The Story: The correct lyrics are " I got puddin' pie banana, Dixie Cups All flavors, and push-ups, too. DLR stated in an interview in 1999. - Submitted by: Mike
Ah, I might as well jump. Jump!
Maxwell Jump
Ah, I might as well jump. Jump!
Might as well jump.
The Story: - Submitted by: KP
Ah, my friend Joe. Joe! My friend Joe.
Ah, I might as well jump. Jump! Might as well jump.
The Story: I actually thought it said that for years until my friend sang along to this song in the car and I said “isn’t it ‘my friend Joe’?” and he told me the real lyrics. We laugh about it to this day - Submitted by: Phinny
Can't you see me standin' here,
I got my back against the record machine
Can't you see me standin' here,
I got my back against the wrecking machine
The Story: For years, everybody thought Roth said 'record machine'. Well, if you watch Van Halen Video Hits Vol. 1 from Warner Bros. on vhs or dvd, if you turn the 'close captioning' option on, you'll find out he said 'wrecking machine'. Not funny, but just correct. - Submitted by: Doug Erdmann
Can't you see me standin' here
I got my back against the record industry.
Can't you see me standin' here
I got my back against the record machine.
The Story: A DJ buddy of mine told me that someone in the record biz thought these were the real lyrics. - Submitted by: John Staton
Can't you see me standin' here?
I got my back against the racket machine.
Can't you see me standin' here?
I got my back against the record machine.
The Story: I was young and I'm Dutch. At the time, my English wasn't that good! - Submitted by: Remco
Fo-orest Gump.
Gump!
Fo-orest Gump.
Go ahead, jump.
Jump!
Go ahead and jump.
The Story: Half asleep at 1am. - Submitted by: Kchula-Rrit
I eat the ones that you've seen
I ain't the worst that you've seen
The Story: I've been singing this wrong for forty years and it took my ten year old daughter to correct me the other day in the car. - Submitted by: Beth McKinlay
I'll eat the warts that you've seen.
I ain't the worst that you've seen.
The Story: My sister took great pleasure in correcting me on this. - Submitted by: Lisa
Maxwell Joe
Joe!
Might as well jump
Jump!
The Story: My friend actually got busted singing these lyrics out loud with a group of girlfriends in a car. When his first child was born, a friend sent a stuffed hippo named 'Maxwell Joe'. - Submitted by: Anne M (s.)
Maxwell Jump
Might as well jump.
The Story: My parents thought this song was about somebody named Maxwell Jump. - Submitted by: Josh Mosh
Maxwell, jump. Jump! Maxwell, jump.
Go ahead, jump. Jump!
Might as well jump. Jump! Might as well jump.
Go ahead, jump. Jump!
The Story: I thought they were talking about some guy named Maxwell and getting him to jump. - Submitted by: Tail-Gunner
Maxwell, jump
Go ahead, jump!
Might as well jump
Go ahead, jump!
The Story: I thought it was about the suicide of Robert Maxwell, the newspaer tycoon. - Submitted by: Mr B
You've got to roll with the punches and get to Montreal
You've got to roll with the punches and gets to whats real
The Story: My husband argued with me for years the David Lee Roth must be from Canada because he mentions Montreal in the song Jump. I was recently able to prove he was wrong. - Submitted by: Amber
Maxwell Jump
Might as well jump
The Story: For years I thought I heard Maxwell jump. One day a boyfriend and I were at home and that song was played on the radio. Marc says, for the longest time I thought the song said Maxwell jump. I started to laugh and said, so did I. - Submitted by: Kimberly Kurczek
Angry Grandpa!
Panama!
The Story: It was me and My Best Friend. We were on the School Bus and this came on. We were singing this and somebody we were sitting next to said “why are they talking about Angry Grandpa?” We said “that’s the name of the title!” We laughed so hard that we almost pissed ourselves! The Bus Driver said “It’s Panama”. We said “it sounded like they were talking about Angry Grandpa”. To this day, we will never forget about this! - Submitted by: Hunchman David
Animal!
Panama!
The Story: I was 17 when this song was popular and I loved it. I was driving somewhere with my friend and his dorky dad, Stu, who was singing 'Animal'! Steve and I in unison were both saying, 'Wait! What are you singing?' - Submitted by: Mike
At you, burning down the avenue
Hot shoe, burnin' down the avenue
The Story: cheap radio, back in the day - Submitted by: denzel
Canada, Canada
Panama, Panama
The Story: My husband first heard this song when he was a young kid. He was playing basketball with some older kids in the neigborhood and thought he'd be cool and sing the song. 'Canada, Canada' - they wouldn't stop laughing at him! - Submitted by: Lisa
Cannibals!
Panama!
The Story: It wasn't actualy me who misheard the lyrics. It was a guy I used to work with. We caught him one day while he was singing along to the radio in a loud machine shop. - Submitted by: E-Man
Cannonball
Panama
The Story: I have always thought that the song was called Cannonball and that is what they said. It wasn't until this morning I heard Van Halen on an old Howard Stern show that I realized the song was actually Panama. - Submitted by: Raney
Canon Ball!
Panama
The Story: I was 42 before I realized the lyric was Panama while in my car and the song came up on the Sirius '80s station and the title clearly said Panama. - Submitted by: Mary
Enema! Enema!
Panama
The Story: My 7 year old daughter and husband were in the truck when this song came on. She heard it and said "Did they just say enema!? That's just weird" - Submitted by: Sara
Had enough had enough
Panama! Panama
The Story: I knew lyrics but a friend was singing along and I heard her sing had enough had enough ff - Submitted by: Demeta
Hang 'em all!
Panama
The Story: When I was young, I thought this song was a typical heavy metal song with grim lyrics. I only later learned the true lyrics of the song. - Submitted by: Susanna Viljanen
Harry and Maude
Panama
The Story: My cousins and I were cruising for beer and the song came on the radio. Thinking she was being super cool, our cousin Mary started shouting the chorus at the top of her lungs, 'Harry and Maude!' A couple of us fell out of the car laughing :) - Submitted by: Troy Lake
Hot Jew, burning down the avenue
Hot shoe, burning down the avenue
The Story: This lyric kinda makes sense, what with Diamond Dave having a Jewish background. - Submitted by: Tom
I reach down between my legs and ease my ball sack
I reach down between my legs and ease the seat back
The Story: This was on Howard Stern's radio program - some guy legally changed his name to Teabag Ballsack because he thought these were the correct lyrics to this song - He has a gay Van Halen band - or something... it was hillarious on the radio - Howard basically played the song and it was quite obvious that they said 'ease the seat back'. Embarassment on the airwaves!!!! Will he change his name? - Submitted by: HSternListener
I reach down in between my legs and ease the tea bag.
I reach down in between my legs and ease the seat back.
The Story: So the story goes, a rap artist going by the name 'Tea Bag' was being interviewed on a morning radio program. The guy had gone so far as to legally change his name to 'Tea Bag', and the radio guys were asking him about this name change, asking him where he came up with 'Tea Bag'. The guy says 'Oh, it's from that Van Halen song... you know, 'Reach down, 'between my legs, and Ease the tea bag...' Needless to say, the rapper was rather pissed and embarassed to learn of his mistake. - Submitted by: 5151 Parrothead
Let it roll, let it ro-oll
Panama, Panama-a
The Story: My sister sang it this way. She always wondered why the song was called 'Panama' when they never said. I finally turned it up really loud and made her listen closely. For over a decade she'd been singing it wrong! - Submitted by: Cathie
Padded Braw, Padded Braw
Panama, Panama
The Story: Was riding in a car when my younger cousin started signing along and blurted Padded Braw with every confidence that he was absolutly correct. - Submitted by: Bradley Spear
Padded bra!
Panama!
The Story: My friend freaked when he found out that it was really "Panama". He said he'd thought they said 'Padded bra' for years. He was very embarrassed by this. - Submitted by: Pcp
Padded bra
Panama
The Story: I heard somebody several years back on the radio in California call in for misheard lyrics. They were in another room of the house and the stereo was in the living room. Anyway the album had just come out and this person was hearing the song for the first time and thought it said 'padded bra', until running into the living room to get a better listen and then realizing what the words really were. - Submitted by: john settle
Playin' in mud.
Panama!
The Story: Never knew the title at first, thought it was a dumb thing for Van Halen to sing about...playing in mud.! Then I heard the title 2 years later.... - Submitted by: Davud Hamill
Reach down between my legs and ease the seed bag
I reach down between my legs and ease the seat back
The Story: My husband sang this when we were dating. I laughed so hard I wet myself. - Submitted by: Marianne
Reach down between my legs, ease the seed bag
Reach down between my legs, ease the seat back
The Story: My fiancée was singing it like this. - Submitted by: Duckie
Reach down,
between my legs,
and ease the skin back
Reach down,
between my legs
and ease the seat back
The Story: I once commented the David Lee Roth must not have been circumcised. When asked why I thought this, I responded, because in the song, Panama, he says, 'reach down, between my legs and ease the skin back' - Submitted by: CAROL HEARN
Turn and run!
Panama
The Story: I always thought it was "Turn and Run", a song about cowardice. - Submitted by: stranded
cannon ball
Panama
The Story: was riding home with a friend, when this song came on the radio. I started singing cannon ball and she said it's panama. I said are you sure, and she said yes I'm sure. - Submitted by: cody baily
Mr. Beat, you lose the rhythm
Miss a beat, you lose the rhythm
The Story: Would anyone of Van Halen ever think about calling another "Mr. Beat"? - Submitted by: Cody Finke
Mr. Clean, you lose the rhythm
Miss a beat, you lose the rhythm
The Story: This was what Procter & Gamble might think about having to do with losing the rhythm - they would talk to a speechless guy, Mr. Clean. Right now maybe we should pay attention to the lyrics (as stated in the music video). - Submitted by: Cody Finke
Ain't got not live.
No love is for real.
Ain't got no love,
No love you'd call real
The Story: Since a teenager, I thought the lyrics were 'No love is for real' and for many years I misquoted that in my head over and over again and to other people, to their confusion. My life might have been very different if I had understood those words correctly. I'VE WASTED MY WHOLE LIFE JUST BECAUSE DIAMOND DAVE CAN'T SING CLEARLY! BWAA BWAA! :-( - Submitted by: Michael
God damn the Navy and all you lifers
I'm gonna tell you one time.
God damn it lady you know I ain't lyin'
I'm gonna tell you one time.
The Story: A buddy (ex-navy) was certain DLR said Navy, and claimed DLR's dad was a doctor in the Navy. Wrong on both counts! - Submitted by: GH
Got no love, no love in Korea.
Got no love, no to call real.
The Story: My moron friend in high school was singing this at the top of his lungs while playing the cassette in his car. - Submitted by: Sean
Running with the deadbolt
Running with the devil
The Story: One day I over-heard my 5 year old daughter singing along to 'Running With The Devil' by 'Van Halen' and man, it's hard to keep from laughing! - Submitted by: Rick
Hey Rico!
Here we go!
The Story: My girlfriend thought that Sammy was talking about his friend 'Rico', to which he was telling the story. - Submitted by: Khan
C*ck meat salad No Trans Fat
Swap meet Sally Tramp Stamp Tat
The Story: My brother heard this song on the radio one day at work and thought he heard the misheard lyrics. - Submitted by: Travenous
Blue eyed murder in a sun spot dress
Blue-eyed murder in a size-five dress
The Story: ahh.. to be young, dumb, and full of weed again. kinda miss those days - Submitted by: Howie Felterbreasts
Blue-eyed minor in a size five dress.
Blue-eyed murder in a size five dress.
The Story: I heard my husband, who is the biggest VH fan in the world, sing these lyrics one day. When I disagreed, we had a friendly argument that lasted off and on about two weeks. He even mocked 'my version,' until I finally got my proof. Funny, turns out that his best friend from childhood had also argued the same thing since the song came out. Of course, I let his friend know that he and I were the winners. We will never let him live it down. Ah, victory! - Submitted by: Rhubes
On a train!
Unchained!
The Story: My dad showed me the album and I was blown away when I discovered it was “Unchined” not “on a train”. - Submitted by: Jake
Waiting for someone to come in and f*** us
Teach you your final love lesson!
Waiting for someone to come into focus
Teach you your final love lesson.
The Story: I thought this was the real lyrics for 25 years! - Submitted by: JT
Waiting for someone to come into monies
Teach you your final location
Waiting for someone to come in to focus
Teach you your final love lesson.
The Story: My misheard lyrics gave the impression of a gold digger waiting around for a sugardaddy or sugarmommy to come along, so I knew it had to be wrong. I can't believe the word is 'focus'. I'll have to listen to it again. - Submitted by: Brian
Waiting for someone to come in to f*** us
Waiting for someone to come into focus
The Story: I used to know someone, originally from Colombia, who mentioned that she always used to avoid saying words like “sheet” and “beach” because they sound dirty when spoken with her accent. “Focus” is another example; one time she inadvertently asked a guy at a camera shop to show her how to “f*** us”. I don’t know when exactly that happened, but if she had heard this song at some point, it wouldn’t have helped her any…because the singer basically pronounced it that way too! (Possibly intentionally, considering that this was Van Halen after all, and their next album would titled For Unlawful Carnal Knowledge.) - Submitted by: Hu’s On First
There are more Van Halen misheard lyrics available.
New entries in this section are currently reviewed by Brian Kelly. Previous editors (if any) are listed on the editors page.