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Misheard Song Lyrics -> Stories -> Hozier
Misheard lyrics (also called mondegreens) occur when people misunderstand the lyrics in a song. These are NOT intentional rephrasing of lyrics, which is called parody. For more information about the misheard lyrics available on this site, please read our FAQ.
This page contains a list of the songs that have stories about their misheard lyrics submitted.
Song names are sorted by first letter, excluding A and The. This is sorted by song title only, not by song title and performer. So if two different performers preformed the same song, you'll see misheard lyrics for both on the same page (provided the song title was spelt the same both times, and misheard lyrics have been submitted for both!).
Hozier's, "Take Me To Church"
The Misheard Lyrics:
I believe that God is dead, but good god let me give you my life,
Take me to church.
Take me to church.
The Real Lyrics:
Offer me that deathless death, but good god let me give you my life,
Take me to church.
Take me to church.
The Story: It was in office depot, over the overspeaker, and it was a song that played. With the acoustics in the room, all you really heard from that part was the highs and few other things. - Submitted by: Pablo Ciffuentes
Hozier's, "Take Me To Church"
The Misheard Lyrics:
Take me to church I will worship like a dog in the sun of the light I will give u my shins sharpen ur knife.
The Real Lyrics:
Take me to church I'll worship like a dog at the shrine of your lies I'll tell you my sins and you can sharpen your knife
The Story: Idk I was kinda weirded out 😂 - Submitted by: Not ur problem
Hozier's, "Take Me To Church"
The Misheard Lyrics:
Take me to your Shower like a dog on a Saturday night
The Real Lyrics:
Take me to church I'll worship like a dog at the shrine of your lies
The Story: When I first heard this song on the radio, this is what I heard. - Submitted by: 2Gama
Hozier's, "Take Me to Church"
The Misheard Lyrics:
I worship like a dog at the shrine of your lies
I'll tell you my sins so you can sharpen your knife
Offer me that deathly stare
Good God, let me give you my life
I'll tell you my sins so you can sharpen your knife
Offer me that deathly stare
Good God, let me give you my life
The Real Lyrics:
I'll worship like a dog at the shrine of your light
I'll tell you my sins so you can sharpen your knife
Offer me that deathless death
Good God, let me give you my life
I'll tell you my sins so you can sharpen your knife
Offer me that deathless death
Good God, let me give you my life
The Story: Deathless death is really hard to pronounce without lisping. And since I hear the first line as "My lover's not human" as well, her having a dead-eyed stare isn't beyond imagination. - Submitted by: vorpal_hamster
Hozier's, "Take Me to Church"
The Misheard Lyrics:
I'll f*ck you like a dog on a Saturday night
I'll tell you my name and we can do it all night
I know that our love is dead
Golly gosh you ain't the love of my life
I'll tell you my name and we can do it all night
I know that our love is dead
Golly gosh you ain't the love of my life
The Real Lyrics:
I'll worship like a dog at the shrine of your light
I'll tell you my sins so you can sharpen your knife
Offer me that deathless death
Good God, let me give you my life
I'll tell you my sins so you can sharpen your knife
Offer me that deathless death
Good God, let me give you my life
The Story: My friends and I used to chant them all day bc we all thought those were the actual lyrics - Submitted by: Kayannah
Hozier's, "Take Me to Church"
The Misheard Lyrics:
I'll warship like a dog in the sovereignty lights
The Real Lyrics:
I'll worship like a dog at the shrine of your light
The Story: I didn't know what it was, so i was like "like a dog in shoverlylies". Then my brother was like, "No, It's sovereignty lights, duh" - Submitted by: Kaydy
Hozier's, "Take Me to Church"
The Misheard Lyrics:
I'll worship like a dog in the Saturday light.
I'll tell you my sins, so you can show me your knife.
I believe that Debra's hair is so gone
Won't you give me my light?
I'll tell you my sins, so you can show me your knife.
I believe that Debra's hair is so gone
Won't you give me my light?
The Real Lyrics:
I'll worship like a dog at the shrine of your light
I'll tell you my sins so you can sharpen your knife
Offer me that deathless death
Good God, let me give you my life
I'll tell you my sins so you can sharpen your knife
Offer me that deathless death
Good God, let me give you my life
The Story: I can never keep this straight. - Submitted by: Eric
Hozier's, "Take Me to Church"
The Misheard Lyrics:
I'll worship like a dog in the sign of your life
I'll tell you my sins so you can sharpen your knife
Offer me that deathless never good girl
Let me give you my life
I'll tell you my sins so you can sharpen your knife
Offer me that deathless never good girl
Let me give you my life
The Real Lyrics:
I'll worship like a dog at the shrine of your light
I'll tell you my sins so you can sharpen your knife
Offer me that deathless death
Good God, let me give you my life
I'll tell you my sins so you can sharpen your knife
Offer me that deathless death
Good God, let me give you my life
The Story: I was singing this in the car and sang it like that and everybody turned to me and was all "Did you just say..." I was embarressed - Submitted by: Hadassah
Hozier's, "Take Me to Church"
The Misheard Lyrics:
My lover's got humour
She used to giggle at a funeral
She used to giggle at a funeral
The Real Lyrics:
My lover's got humour
She's the giggle at a funeral
She's the giggle at a funeral
The Story: That's honestly what I heard. I used to go WTF, why would she giggle at funerals? o.O - Submitted by: Annie
Hozier's, "Take Me to Church"
The Misheard Lyrics:
Take me to church
I'll whoop you like a dog on a Saturday night
I'll beat ya real bad make you sharpen your knife
You ain't Gettin the best of me
it's my countrified destiny!
I'll whoop you like a dog on a Saturday night
I'll beat ya real bad make you sharpen your knife
You ain't Gettin the best of me
it's my countrified destiny!
The Real Lyrics:
Take me to church, I'll worship like a dog on the shrine of your lies.
I'll tell you my sins and you can sharpen your knife
Offer me that deathless death
Good God, let me give you my life
I'll tell you my sins and you can sharpen your knife
Offer me that deathless death
Good God, let me give you my life
The Story: Was driving, half listening. In some cultures "take you to church" is an insult along the lines of "school you" so it sounded like a dispute. - Submitted by: JamesC
Hozier's, "Take Me to Church"
The Misheard Lyrics:
Take me to church and I'll shoot you like a dog on a Saturday night
The Real Lyrics:
Take me to church and I'll worship like a dog at the shrine of your lies
The Story: my husbands version - Submitted by: Danielle
Hozier's, "Take Me to Church"
The Misheard Lyrics:
ill worship like a dog at your shrine in the night
ill tell you my sins so you can use your knife
offer me that dreadful breath
good god, give her some light
ill tell you my sins so you can use your knife
offer me that dreadful breath
good god, give her some light
The Real Lyrics:
I'll worship like a dog at the shrine of your light
I'll tell you my sins so you can sharpen your knife
Offer me that deathless death
Good God, let me give you my life
I'll tell you my sins so you can sharpen your knife
Offer me that deathless death
Good God, let me give you my life
The Story: I was in shower and the water was clogging my ears and I misheard so wrong!!!!! - Submitted by: jeff
There are more Hozier misheard lyrics available.
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