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Song Parodies -> "Battle Hymn Of The Banana Republic"

Original Song Title:

"Battle Hymn Of The Republic"

Original Performer:

Traditional

Parody Song Title:

"Battle Hymn Of The Banana Republic"

Parody Written by:

Kristof Robertson

The Lyrics

Any resemblance to any tinpot dictatorship, living or dead, is entirely coincidental...
Way down Central America, quite near El Salvador
There's a little nation you may not have come across before
Coz it's really only been around since 1994
Say, what's this country's name?

El or San Something-or-other
Army Chief's the Prez's brother
And the the treasurer's his mother
But that might change today...

Well, we know it's pretty obvious the government will crash
But we've all been told we're lucky, coz they've just found oil and gas
You hombres can have democracy, we'd rather have the cash
That's just our third world way!

Glory glory las banana
Maybe we'll be rich mañana
Ev'ry peasant, ev'ry farmer
Is trafficking cocaine

When your currency is toilet paper, things are pretty dire
But El Presidente's organised a tour by Mariah
She's supported by the Mormon freakin' Tabernacle Choir..
Rev'lution's on its way!!

Glory glory, catholic madre
She hoped I would be a padre
But I'd rather take the hard way
To Heaven's pearly gate

In the capital the president has built a casa nice
If he thinks he'll be there Saturday, he should be thinkin' twice!
Far too many years of watching reruns of Miami Vice
Have addled up his brain..

Glory glory revolution!
It's the optimal solution
To political pollution
And "burros" holding sway

Our geography is wondrous and our beaches hard to beat
But our deficit is higher than the smackheads on the street
Seems a popular uprising sure would make the day complete
Let's storm an embassy!!

Freedom fighters with bandanas
Smoking mucho marijuanna
Play us some Carlos Santana
We'll all call ourselves "Che"

If your Uncle Sam can help out, it would really make our day
And if he installs a puppet, we will look the other way
We will even sew his jeans and sneakers for illegal pay
We love the USA!!

Glory glory Alabama
Mississippi and Montana
Viva la Republicana!!
Bananas cheap...OLE!!!

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.9
How Funny: 4.8
Overall Rating: 4.8

Total Votes: 26

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 1
 0
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   1
 1
 2
 
 4   1
 0
 0
 
 5   24
 24
 24
 

User Comments

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Sweet Indigo - December 23, 2004 - Report this comment
Hehehe :) Sad but mostly true....
Phil Alexander - December 23, 2004 - Report this comment
Brilliant, Kristof.
Know 1 can hear you dream - December 23, 2004 - Report this comment
There are two types of parodists that would use a line like "El or San Something-or-other": The newbie that can come up with a better rhyme. And the experienced one who uses it for enhancing effect. I don't really have to specify in which of those categories I rank you, do I? :-)
know 1 can hear you tupo - December 23, 2004 - Report this comment
The newbie that can't, dammit.
MasonR - December 23, 2004 - Report this comment
I had a bit of trouble with the pacing for the first couple of verses but who cares--this was brilliant. Lots of funny lines, like "Our geography is wondrous and our beaches hard to beat/But our deficit is higher than the smackheads on the street" Very high 5's!
alvin rhodes - December 23, 2004 - Report this comment
funniest one i read today...bravo..or is that ole' ?
John Barry - December 23, 2004 - Report this comment
Viva esta parodia!
Kristof Robertson - December 23, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanx all...I had fun with this one and had to stop myself at 6 verse/choruses. K1chyd: Thanks for the compliment on my "experience"..that particular line hopefully reflected that we hear about these chaotic lttle countries, but sorta don't really pay attention. Mason..if you stick to the 15 syllable shuffle, you can't go wrong: every line bar the very first has exactly the same meter. Indigo, Phil, Al and John: Le estoy agradeciendo por votos y palabras!!
Stuart McArthur - December 23, 2004 - Report this comment
This is an absolute gem, Kristof - flows so naturally, with sly wit and everything good - excellente - 555
Righty - December 23, 2004 - Report this comment
The lighter side of petty Central American dictatorships: I love it! This reminds me a lot of "The Little Mouse That Roared."
Arwen - December 24, 2004 - Report this comment
Lovely, Kristof...=)
Michael Pacholek - December 24, 2004 - Report this comment
I can't believe I'm the first to say this, but... This one has plenty of appeal.
Kristof Robertson - March 23, 2005 - Report this comment
For those reading for the "B" comp...ma(box) in chorus 2 should be manana (the cedillo on the top of the n screwed it up)
Adagio - April 05, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC 2005) This was so delightful, I smiled the whole way through and cracked up...er laughed, too. 5's
Charlie Decker - April 05, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC) I could have sworn that I commented on this one before. Well, anyway, amazing job with this one!
Agrimorfee - April 06, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC05) I especially liked the so-bad-they-are-good forced rhymes in stanza 10!
Scathe - April 07, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC-B) I need to watch more news.
MysteryGoat - April 08, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC) DKTOS
Guy - April 08, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC-B) Reminds me of "Wag the Dog". So true and so funny.
Jake A Ralphing (Luke Brattoni) - April 09, 2005 - Report this comment
Hey, I knows the tune! Ingenious parody, Kristof.
Stuart McArthur - April 11, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC-05) - see above - and from memory this was your first parody back from overseas, wasn't it? - I remember it slaying me at the time too
Melhi - April 11, 2005 - Report this comment
(aBc) Great work, Kristof! The "El or San Something or other" line was my fave!
Johnny D - April 13, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC) LOL, frikkin' genius!
Jeff Reuben - April 15, 2005 - Report this comment
It's got a-peel!
ABC's OF PARODIES ROUND "B" GOLD MEDAL - April 17, 2005 - Report this comment
http://www.inthe00s.com/index.php?action=dlattach;topic=3010.0;id=5191;image
Jordan (Mike Armstrong) - April 17, 2005 - Report this comment
Just wanted you to know I got the whole Ché, Santana reference. Very clever. Still astonishing that a musician would parade around in a Ché shirt at a major ceremony and then have the audacity to perform a live concert in Miami. Just think, years ago Cubans were being mercilessly harrassed for listening to his music. How do you spell insensitive? C A R L O S
Waxwing - March 02, 2006 - Report this comment
Mark Twain's parody was servicible but basically lamely derivitive. This one is from the same mold. I'll admit my parody standards are high, and that I really only like ones that are brilliant enough to transform the original, or are so vulgar that they brilliantly travesty the original. Indignant or earnest ones, even when I agree with the political message, leave me cold.
Red Ant - May 06, 2006 - Report this comment
(ABC Finals) ^WTH? I have to admit I didn't get some of this, but wow, great work here Kristof. 555.
Johnny D - May 29, 2006 - Report this comment
(ABC Finals) See above!

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