Three philosophers walked in a bar, parlez-vous
Three philosophers walked in a bar, parlez-vous
Three philosphers walked in a bar
Aristotle, he was most sloshed by far
Hinky-dinky parlez-vous,
hinky-dinky parlezvous

Two other were Plato and Socrates, parlez-vous
two other were Plato and Socrates, parlez-vous
two other were Plato and Socrates
as they sought the wine and ouzo and pi55
Hinky-dinky parlez-vous,
hinky-dinky parlez-vous

They met many friends who were there to drink, parlez vous
they met many friends who were there to drink, parlez-vous
Pythagoras was too soused to think
Hinky-dinky parlez-vous,
hinky-dinky parlez-vous

Heidegger, he said he'd out-consume, parlez-vous
Heidegger, he said he'd out-consume, parlez-vous
Heidegger, he saiz he'd out-consume
just anyone else but David Hume
Hinky-dinky parlez-vous,
hinky-dinky parlez-vous

Adam Smith, he ordered a drink, parlez-vous
Adam Smith, he ordered a drink, parlez-vous
Adam Smith, he ordered a drink
and so did Marx, but his was pink
Hinky-dinky parlez-vous,
hinky-dinky parlez-vous

Newton and Leibniz had a dram, parlez-vous
Newton and Leibniz had a dram, parlez-vous
Newton and Leibniz had a dram
Descartes said "I drink, therefore I am"
Hinky-dinky parlez-vous,
hinky-dinky parlez-vous

Berkeley would have, but he didn't dare, parlez-vous
Berkeley would have, but he didn't dare, parlez-vous
Berkeley would have, but he didn't dare
he was not sure if the pub was there
Hinky-dinky parlez-vous,
hinky-dinky parlez-vous

Sartre and Camus were off to fight, parlez-vous
Sartre and Camus were off to fight, parlez-vous
Satre and Camus were off to fight
with whom would de Beauvoir spend the night
Hinky-dinky parlez-vous,
hinky-dinky parlez-vous

Lenin and Hegel raised their glasses, parlez-vous
Lenin and Hegel raised their glasses, parlez-vous
Lenin and Hegel raised their glasses
"Work is the curse of the drinking classes"
Hinky-dinky parlez-vous,
hinky-dinky parlez-vous

Wittgenstein, he had a beer, parlez-vous
Wittgenstein, he had a beer, parlez-vous
Wittgenstein, he had a beer
but Schopenhauer, just vodka sheer
Hinky-dinky parlez-vous,
hinky-dinky parlez-vous

Hobbes and Nietsche had a quarrel, parlez-vous
Hobbes and Nietsche had a quarrel, parlez-vous
Hobes and Nietzsche had a quarrel
could an Übermensc consume whole barrel
Hinky-dinky parlez-vous,
hinky-dinky parlez-vous

Sun Tzu, he sang with Mencius, parlez-vous
Sun Tzu, he sang with Mencius, parlez-vous
Sun Tzu, he sang with Mencius
as the whole gang was one Confucius
Hinky-dinky parlez-vous,
hinky-dinky parlez-vous