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Song Parodies -> "Fiji"

Original Song Title:

"Miss T"

Original Performer:

Traditional

Parody Song Title:

"Fiji"

Parody Written by:

Robert D. Arndt Jr.

The Lyrics

Think bottled water is safer than tap water? Not in all cases. Bottled water is managed by the FDA while tap water is managed by the EPA. Fiji water was tested under EPA guidelines and was discovered to have very unsafe levels of arsenic in it! Cleveland tap water was proven cleaner. How much bottled water do we buy a week? Half a billion bottles! Who profits? The water companies, bottle manufacturers, and the oil industry that provides the oil to make plastic. Some say the whole pure water bottle industry is a scam. One would do better buying a 2.2l jug and fill it with running filtered tap water. And btw, 45% of bottled water comes from the same sources as tap water!
Not a praiseworthy thing
False advertising
That bottled water Fiji drink
Well, it isn't even clean!

Drink Arizona or Snapple
Gatorade, power-something
Starbuck's in a bottle
Tap water that is running!

Fiji is abhorrent
The FDA doesn't debate
The high levels of arsenic
Tap is safer per the EPA!

Fiji is awful
Dangerous you see?
So it's bottled water
Not as healthy as believed!!!

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 8

Voting Breakdown

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User Comments

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Lucy Lement - September 15, 2016 - Report this comment
Thanks for the fun reminder that bottled water can be a scam. While I fully appreciate the need for security guidelines, I always hate being forced to buy bottled water to take on airplanes. I should make more of an effort to taste the water from the fountain coolers at the airports first, before automatically buying a bottle of water after I get through security.
Rob Arndt - September 15, 2016 - Report this comment
I have never believed in the purity claims of bottled water companies. I have a 2.2l water jug I got from Walmart and have a filter on my tap I got from Costco. Good enough. Some friends I know buy tremendous amounts of store water and their health has not improved. They just take their pills with bought water. I take mine with free tap. Besides, there are drinking water fountains in nearly all the stores near me. Why pay for store water or fast food drinks when you can drink for free? And I live in hot, sunny California! Thanks for your comment Lucy :)

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