The election is just weeks away
Of the candidates and spouses
The voters are of one accord
"A pox on all their houses!"

Cream always rises to the top
That's what their teachers taught 'em
But the Democrats and the G-O-P
Went scraping from the bottom

By all the standards of the past
These two are most unworthy
She screeches like a harridan
His words are crude and earthy

He's racist and he's sexist, too
The pundits have conceded
His skin is white, he is a male
No further proof is needed

Our nation's secrets she exposed
In some unprotected email
She'd prob'bly be in prison now
If she hadn't been a female

They haven't brought indictments yet
Though the FBI keeps doggin'
But could her loss of mem'ry stem
From that bump upon her noggin'

He won their votes with some plans extreme
But to his supporters' sorrow
The positions he took in the spring
He will change them all tomorrow

No Muslim shall be welcome here
It has been well reported
Now it seems the Mexicans can stay
But the Dutch will be deported

The press would like to talk to her
There's only one solution
Just fill the lady's bank account
With a big cash contribution

She has high hopes for victory
This autumn in November
'cause the incident at the consulate
The public won't remember

Three hundred million in our land
Three hundred million voices
All speak with unanimity
"Give us some better choices!"

Two campaigns, both unpopular
Are failing to inspire us
The lead in this week's Gallup Poll
Goes to the Zika virus