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Song Parodies -> "Flip The Bird"

Original Song Title:

"If You're Happy And You Know It"

Original Performer:

Traditional

Parody Song Title:

"Flip The Bird"

Parody Written by:

Peter Andersson a.k.a K1chyd

The Lyrics

I´m used to sing an always very adlibbed version of this song, hence I´m used to letting the last line vary some in length, at least plus-minus one syllable, and I´ve allowed myself the same freedom here. I hope you like it anyway. If you don´t, guess what I´m gonna do! ;-)
1
If you´re angry and you know it, flip the bird
Don´t you hesitate to show it, flip the bird
If you can not count to ten
If you got a plaqued up pen
If you flunked your course in zen
Flip the bird

2
If your temper´s long restrained now, flip the bird
Get your anger-rights regained now, flip the bird
If the team you hate has won
If you´re at a South Park Con
If you´re Dennis Rodman´s son
Flip the bird

3
If your local radio´s stinking, flip the bird
If your patience with it´s sinking, flip the bird
If you´re tired of that Britney
And the way she´s moaning "hit me"
And that Houston´s shamed by Whitney
Flip the bird

4
If you´re put up for detention, flip the bird
If you don´t mind the attention, flip the bird
If you´re running out of dough
If the pizza guy is slow
Even if he is your bro'
Flip the bird

5
If you´re cut off in mid traffic, flip the bird
If you hate that guy Ben Affleck, flip the bird
Pearlie Harbor could have passed
Willie Hunting was a gas
But he´s doing J´Lo´s ass
Flip the bird

6
If you´re betting wrong on eeries, flip the bird
If the Cubs do win the series, flip the bird
If the turtle beats the bunny
If your losing streak´s uncanny
Lest you owe the bokkie money
Flip the bird

7
If a barmaid calls you "bother", flip the bird
If you´re turned down for another, flip the bird
To the barman shake your fist
Tip him off on what he missed
You deserve to be real pissed
Flip the bird

8
If your nine-to-five job´s stinking, flip the bird
If you´re not that good at thinking, flip the bird
If you´re working for the man
If the shit has hit the fan
If you have to kiss the Gran
Flip the bird

9
If you get to go on Springer, flip the bird
If you wish you had a stinger, flip the bird
If you´re off to ´Stan as drafted
Cos your postman´s really crafted
And your girlfriend´s getting shafted
Flip the bird

10
If you´re constantly neglected, flip the bird
If the losing guy´s elected, flip the bird
Politicians learn to buck it
Just like hos are trained to suck it
Only sound response is "f**k it"
Flip the bird

11
If you see Hussein in Baghdad, flip the bird
If Nichole-Smith got yo' dad bagged, flip the bird
If you´re really not that tactile
If you overflow with black bile
If you´re gothic with a black smile
Flip the bird

12
If your trustfond bank´s embessling, flip the bird
If your spouse are stuck on wrestling, flip the bird
If your trailer park´s evicted
Like your Ma-in-Law predicted
Don´t you kill and be convicted
Flip the bird

13
If the rain just keeps on pouring, flip the bird
If you think this song is boring, flip the bird
If your babysitter´s Wacko
If he lubes your son with Taco
Show directions to sky´s Draco
Flip the bird

14
If you´re hussled by the collars, flip the bird
If the gas price reach two dollars, flip the bird
If you´re fired for your slacking
If a sense of tact you´re lacking
If you find your woman packing
Flip the bird

15
If the corner punk´s a bother, flip the bird
Even if you are his father, flip the bird
If you payed too many bills
For a quickie lovin' thrill
With a bitch who missed the pill
Flip the bird

16
If your kids a bunch a wieners, flip the bird
If they rip you at the cleaners, flip the bird
If your girlfriend is too bossy
If your neighbour is like Ozzy
If your hounded by a possy
Flip the bird

17
If you think that France expired, flip the bird
If their pisswine makes you tired, flip the bird
If your boyfriend says he´s gay
If he´s got a tounge of clay
Turning cheek is not the way
Flip the bird

18
If the Star Wars fans are lining, flip the bird
If there´s no force there to fine´em, flip the bird
Be the local black cape baddy
Beat the lightsword carrying caddy
Call Darth Vader CPAP Daddy
Flip the bird

19
If the world is out to break you, flip the bird
When the Reaper comes to take you, flip the bird
If it´s not your time to go
If you´re hunted by a crow
If you´re heading down below
Flip the bird

20
If your wife is Peggy Bundy, it´s your fate
If you´re known around as Gandhi, it´s too late
Karma´s up for soul digestion
Do or don´t your will´s the question
Listen here is my suggestion
FLIP THE BIRD
©. CPAP is pronounced See-Paep. A medical abbreviation for Continous Positive Airway Pressure. A piece of ICU equipment for people who can´t breathe themselves. Like Darth Vader. Also, thanx to Nemi and James over at Sevspace for proofreading, even though I didn´t take all the advices. :-) And finally, if your pet peeve has been left out here, write your own verse in the commentary fields (I might summon them up for a prolonged version, in a month or so).

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 10

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
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 0
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
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 4   0
 0
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 5   10
 10
 10
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Nemi - July 18, 2003 - Report this comment
"If the pacing isn't perfect, flip the bird...." ;)
Deirdre - August 05, 2003 - Report this comment
If pop-ups keep on popping, flip the bird. So your computer keeps on stopping, flip the bird Come get 12 cd's for free Or research your family tree! Pop-ups won't stop both'rin me So flip the bird If you're sick of that clown, Avril, flip the bird Her music makes you down an Advil, flip the bird Skater Boy and Complicated They are really over-rated 'stead of wishing her ill-fated Flip the bird
Phil Alexander - August 07, 2003 - Report this comment
If your pet peeve is left out here, flip the bird
There's no need to go without here, flip the bird
Don't get overexcited
See - Snaggletoth invited
Us all just to write it
Flip the bird
Pat - August 07, 2003 - Report this comment
I enjoyed it, I must want to flip someone off. 5's!!
Joelle - August 11, 2003 - Report this comment
I loved that! HAHAHA!
Rick D - January 22, 2004 - Report this comment
Another random search. Another gem.
Johnny "CPAP Daddy" D - August 03, 2004 - Report this comment
A really funny one! I am a CPAP patient, believe it or not.....my prescription is 10, and I use a RemStar Plus with Ultra Mirage Standard Headgear, in case anybody is curious.

(sounds of heavy breathing) ....... I FIND YOUR LACK OF *cough*, AH, FAITH, *cough* *HACK* *COUGH*, DIS---*COUGH,HACK*---TUR---*COUGHCOUGH*----BING---*HACK HACK COUGH COUGH COUGH*....And with that, Darth Vader's bad habit of smoking Imperial Gold caught up with him, and the Galaxy was free at last.
Know 1 can hear you dream - August 04, 2004 - Report this comment
That does explain a lot, how time you have so much come on your hands for starters. Hmm... that didn´t come out right, or did it? ;-)
Johnny D - August 04, 2004 - Report this comment
Mark 7:15

;-D
Know 1 can hear you dream - August 04, 2004 - Report this comment
Johnny: Clever comment! Biblewords seems to be to some site-builders what a private CD Collection is to those who take a crash course in Excel. :-)
Johnny D - August 11, 2004 - Report this comment
(SOTM July 2000) CPAP Daddy-O still likes it!
Know 1 can hear you dream - August 12, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanx Johnny, but this one is not in any SOTM contest, I think you have mixed it up with my parody of "99 bottles of beer on the wall". Also by Traditional.
Aaron C - September 05, 2004 - Report this comment
if your parent walks in flip the bird if your rubbing it again flip the bird if your jacking it in hand and your parent gets real mad then look at them all sad and flip the bird ok ok its not as good as most of them but oh well good for a laugh ya?
Jack - November 29, 2004 - Report this comment
Have you been caught too many times with your pants down?
Red Ant - March 08, 2006 - Report this comment
Read this song of 20 verses, flip the bird
If it's overkill or worse jus(t) flip the bird
Well this comment here is dying
But you had some kick a$$ rhyming
If you think I am not fiving
THAT'S ABSURD!

Great parody here Peter; to answer your question mine was the 11th parody of this song so it has quite a ways to go before it reaches the list.
Royce Miller - May 22, 2006 - Report this comment
I know this parody is several years old now, but I just read it today; it looks like you were able to release some real angst with this parody, Peter--quite a masterpiece, being so lengthy and all.

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