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Song Parodies -> "Ohms in the Range"

Original Song Title:

"Home on the Range"

Original Performer:

Traditional

Parody Song Title:

"Ohms in the Range"

Parody Written by:

Susanna Viljanen

The Lyrics

"Ohmic sausage" is a traditional snack of Helsinki U. of Technology. Do NOT attempt to make it at home unless you know what you are doing.
Oh, give me a cord and two stainless forks
and a sausage which I'm going to fry
On both sausage end shall the forks I append
and the cord to the forks I will tie

Ohms, ohms are in the range
Where the sausage will sizzle and fry
With 230 volts I will give it some jolts
and the AC will cook it thereby

I'll try not blow the fuse and not get a bruise
as the sausage I'll electrocute
In ten seconds or so is the end of the show
and the sausage is done as meal good

Ohms, ohms are in the range
With the beer and the mustard to serve
It's an HUT treat and I'm sure none will beat
it's a neat snack for those who have nerve

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.5
How Funny: 4.4
Overall Rating: 4.4

Total Votes: 11

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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User Comments

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Jenny - September 16, 2014 - Report this comment
Poor sausage... that is a cruel and unusual punishment!
Callmelennie - September 16, 2014 - Report this comment
Ohm my Makkara!! ..... Thanks for that helpful link, Susanna. Now I'll be able to electrocute sausage -- just as soon as I master Finnish
Patrick - September 16, 2014 - Report this comment
I found a shorter video in which the sausage was sliced before the electrodes were applied. The meat actually began to make a whistling sound, just before it burst into flame and began emitting clouds of smoke. The cook used a 230 Volt outlet. But, I imagine a US 120V would produce similar results. Is this a popular method of cooking in Finland?
Susanna Viljanen - September 16, 2014 - Report this comment
Let's say that techies and especially students of my alma mater are prone to invent all kinds of hacks on borderline of insanity - such as barbecuing a sausage by leading the electric current directly through it. When you got lots of intelligence, strange sense of humour and very little wisdom, innovations like that are sure to pop out.

The ohmic sausage is actually a working and quick way to barbecue a sausage, but it is also extremely dangerous - if you touch the sausage when current on, you will get potentially lethal electric shock. Also if the electrodes are not tightly attached to the sausage, an electric arc and subsequent fire will ensue.

I have done my fair share of hacks, but I've never tried ohmic sausage. Most people do have enough common sense not to try to electrocute their food. My father-in-law once did it, and he said there was a significant side taste of ozone.

Yes, the American 120 V / 60 Hz will produce similar results. No insurance will cover any damage to people or property if something goes wrong.
Rob Arndt - September 16, 2014 - Report this comment
Nice one Suzanna- 555! I haven't used direct voltage to cook a sausage yet, but there's nothing like a pulse jet BBQ or cooking eggs and bacon on a sizzling hot car hood in the desert either! We have lots of people who also eat roadkill over here Suzanna, how about in Finland?
Jonathan - September 16, 2014 - Report this comment
I know a guy who tried this once... boy was he in for a shock! 5's
Susanna Viljanen - September 17, 2014 - Report this comment
Rob, yes, people do eat roadkills here, and they also tan their furs. One of my Medieval dresses is trimmed with the fur of an overdriven fox. Another "techie" method to fry sausage is to use blowtorch. Not suggestable, though!
Patrick - September 17, 2014 - Report this comment
I can recall reading stories of people wrapping meat and potatoes in aluminum foil and placing it on the exhaust manifold of their cars before taking a long drive.

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