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Song Parodies -> "Home in the North"

Original Song Title:

"Home on the Range"

Original Performer:

Traditional

Parody Song Title:

"Home in the North"

Parody Written by:

Susanna Viljanen

The Lyrics

Oh, I have a home where the mosquito swarm
where midges and horseflies they play
Where seldom is heard an encouraging word
and snow on the ground is to stay

Home, home in the North!
at the sixtieth the latitudes' forth
Where seldom is heard an encouraging word
and snow on the ground is to stay

Where the air is so cold, and the Westerlies blow
with breezes of fifty knots speed;
And on summer day the mercury'll stay
up above of the thirty degs C

Home, Home in the North
For all of those screw-ups it's worth
And on summer day the mercury'll stay
up above of the thirty degs C

It's dark in night and the stars are so bright,
in the winter when it's 10 AM
Have I stood there amazed and asked as I gazed,
Is this country spellbound and damned?

Home, Home in the North
Where the cold and the darkness's no mirth
Have I stood there amazed and asked as I gazed,
Is this country spellbound and damned?

Oh, I love these wild flowers in this dear land of ours,
It is 'bout the only thing which here grow
As the soil is so poor and the weather, for sure
make certain no crops here will show

Home, Home in the North
Where I have had bad luck of birth
As the soil is so poor and the weather, for sure
make certain no crops here will show

Oh give me a land where the beaches are sand,
and not rocks and the stones they are here
Where the graceful white swan goes gliding along,
Here the cormorants poop everywhere!

Home, Home in the North
I'd rather would live south at Perth:
Where the graceful white swan goes gliding along,
Here the cormorants poop everywhere!

We have ten thousand lakes and some venomous snakes
we have beer, we have pot and dope, yay!
Nokia is gone, but we will linger on
Even though it's tough live day by day

Home, Home in the North
where the beer will make greater your girth
Nokia is gone, but we will linger on
Even though it's tough live day by day

We've fought to be free and our history
has been written in blood, sweat and tear
We've been unaligned, but it is tightrope so fine
when both NATO and Russia are near

Home, Home in the North
where the wars and the struggles been dearth:
We've been unaligned, but it is tightrope so fine
when both NATO and Russia are near

Now if I had a home where the buffalo roamed
and the deer and the antelope played;
I'm sure I'd still miss this Northern land's bliss
it's the North where I still want to stay

Home, Home in the North
Although it's the anus of Earth:
I'm sure I'd still miss this Northern land's bliss
it's the North where I still want to stay

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 5

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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User Comments

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Patrick - September 11, 2014 - Report this comment
I have a feeling this song is not going to win the contest for a new national anthem. "Home On The Range" is the official State song of Kansas. Some people have called Kansas City, Kansas the "anus" (only in Anglo-Saxon synonym) of the region. There is a town named "Stull" that purports to be a portal to Hell, about 60km to the west. The idea of 24 hour daylight has always intrigued me. But those long, sunless winters have to be tough. Didn't know Finland had poisonous snakes. We get the mosquitoes and other obnoxious insects. 37C days in summer, though not this year. Some people expand their minds with drugs, but expanding one's girth with beer is much more popular, and slightly more legal, though Kansas is notorious for some weird laws regarding the sale and use of alcohol. The US Civil War began as a border war between Kansas and Missouri in the early 1850's, 10 years before Fort Sumter. The annual football game between the two universities was still a major event until one team joined a different conference, thus ending a hundred year rivalry. I think sometimes we love our native soil as much for its defects as for its more praiseworthy features. I can think of some sociological advantages to an extremely cold climate, but don't want to arouse politically correct animosities.
Jonathan - September 11, 2014 - Report this comment
"sings horribly" Oh Susanna darn good parody I liked it so I'll rate it with a score that's 5's of three! < guess which old folk song that was :)

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