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Song Parodies -> "Michael Warns Is Not Okay"

Original Song Title:

"Michael, Row The Boat Ashore"

Original Performer:

Traditional

Parody Song Title:

"Michael Warns Is Not Okay"

Parody Written by:

Hu's On First

The Lyrics

Rick Santorum is going to be in some pretty hot water now, because the pastor he invited just the other day to speak and sing at one of his Florida rallies makes Jeremiah Wright look squeaky-clean. "Michael Warns" aka "Michael the Black Man" (real name either Michael Symonette or Maurice Woodside) is a former member of the violent, anti-Semitic black supremacist "Yahweh ben Yahweh" cult. While in the cult, Michael was accused of participating in two murders, but managed to go free even though his own brother testified against him. Since then he has allegedly committed several other violent crimes although he hasn't been convicted of any of them. In the past few years he's gotten involved in Tea Party activism and claimed that Obama, Oprah Winfrey and "1/3 of black women in America" are the Antichrist. Such a batty man. What was Santorum thinking?
Michael Warns is not okay, Rick Santorum
He will make you melt away, Rick Santorum

Jerry Wright is not as bad, Rick Santorum
As this crazy "Michael" cad, Rick Santorum

You should vet them who appear, Rick Santorum
When you rally voters here, Rick Santorum

Sunshine State's not a very good land, for Santorum
Newt or Mitt will win this hand, poor Santorum

Michael shot two men before, Rick Santorum
This won't make folks like you more, Rick Santorum

It is good to be diverse, Rick Santorum
But this man is just a curse, Rick Santorum

All the crazy things you hear him say, Rick Santorum
Thinks Obama's with the KKK, Rick Santorum

Yahweh Yahweh thought he was God, Rick Santorum
But his cult was just a bunch of clods, Rick Santorum

Warns thinks Dems are Nazi scum, Rick Santorum
Why'd you choose to hire this bum, Rick Santorum

This guy goes by four different names, Rick Santorum
Is there something of which he's ashamed? Rick Santorum

Yahweh cult thought the Jews are a scam, Rick Santorum
And God's real chosen are the black man, Rick Santorum

That won't help you down in West Palm Beach, Rick Santorum
Jewish voters might be out of reach for Santorum

Everybody's gonna flock to Newt, poor Santorum
The Big Orange might give Rick the boot, oh Santorum

You might find the 31st* unkind, Rick Santorum
Ol' Miami's gonna peel your rind, Rick Santorum
*Florida primary is January 31st Read more about this guy here and here. If you really want to take a ride into the Twilight Zone, you can visit his official website.

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Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 3

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User Comments

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Savage Revenge - January 24, 2012 - Report this comment
Google the word "santorum". The search page that comes up shows a site called "spreadingsantorum.com". Don't do this if you just ate as it's quite disgusting (but quite hilarious).
Michael Pacholek - January 24, 2012 - Report this comment
For a moment there, I was worried... but Sanctimonious Santorum is just the latest Republican to have a clergyman who makes Jeremiah Wright look like Mr. Rogers (and Fred Rogers actually WAS an ordained minister).
Patrick - January 24, 2012 - Report this comment
I'm an ordained minister myself. Though a hoity-toity deacon of my acquaintance once said to me "I was ordained by a church, not an inkjet printer". While Obama is indeed the anti-Christ, so was Bill Clinton. It's sort of like being president, it's a title that can be passed on. I have seen references to an obscene or disgusting meaning for "santorum". I believe that a syndicated gay newspaper columnist sought to apply the name Santorum to something. It was a word in search of a negative meaning.
Patrick - January 24, 2012 - Report this comment
It is also the custom among some right wingers to use the name of Charlie Schumer for similar purposes, such as "In deep Schumer" or "When the Schumer hits the fan".

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