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Song Parodies -> "A 911 Dispatchers Tale (Or, Alternately, the Twelve Days of My Job)"

Original Song Title:

"12 Days of Christmas"

Original Performer:

Traditional

Parody Song Title:

"A 911 Dispatchers Tale (Or, Alternately, the Twelve Days of My Job)"

Parody Written by:

Kristina Emily

The Lyrics

Actually, this isn't my job, but I hope to be an Emergency Room Physician some day. And LOC means loss of consiousness (sp?)
On the first day of my job, a call was sent to me:
"My cat is stuck in a tree!!!"

On the second day of my job, a call was sent to me:
Two broken legs and
"My cat is stuck in a tree!!!"

On the third day of my job, a call was sent to me:
Three LOC's
Two broken legs and
"My cat is stuck in a tree!!!"

On the fourth day of my job, a call was sent to me:
Four kitchen fires
Three LOC's
Two broken legs and
"My cat is stuck in a tree!!!"

On the fifth day of my job, a call was sent to me:
Fiiiiive robberiiiiiiiies
Four kitchen fires
Three LOC's
Two broken legs and
"My cat is stuck in a tree!!!"

On the sixth day of my job, a call was sent to me:
Six overdoses
Fiiiiive robberiiiiiiiies
Four kitchen fires
Three LOC's
Two broken legs and
"My cat is stuck in a tree!!!"

On the seventh day of my job, a call was sent to me:
Seven children choking
Six overdoses
Fiiiiive robberiiiiiiiies
Four kitchen fires
Three LOC's
Two broken legs and
"My cat is stuck in a tree!!!"

On the eighth day of my job, a call was sent to me:
Eight guys a'puking
Seven children choking
Six overdoses
Fiiiiive robberiiiiiiiies
Four kitchen fires
Three LOC's
Two broken legs and
"My cat is stuck in a tree!!!"

On the ninth day of my job, a call was sent to me:
Nine brutal stabbings
Eight guys a'puking
Seven children choking
Six overdoses
Fiiiiive robberiiiiiiiies
Four kitchen fires
Three LOC's
Two broken legs and
"My cat is stuck in a tree!!!"

On the tenth day of my job, a call was sent to me:
Ten old hags croaking
Nine brutal stabbings
Eight guys a'puking
Seven children choking
Six overdoses
Fiiiiive robberiiiiiiiies
Four kitchen fires
Three LOC's
Two broken legs and
"My cat is stuck in a tree!!!"

On the eleventh day of my job, a call was sent to me:
Eleven heart attacks
Ten old hags croaking
Nine brutal stabbings
Eight guys a'puking
Seven children choking
Six overdoses
Fiiiiive robberiiiiiiiies
Four kitchen fires
Three LOC's
Two broken legs and
"My cat is stuck in a tree!!!"

On the twelve day of my job, a call was sent to me:
Twelve ugly drownings
Eleven heart attacks
Ten old hags croaking
Nine brutal stabbings
Eight guys a'puking
Seven children choking
Six overdoses
Fiiiiive robberiiiiiiiies
Four kitchen fires
Three LOC's
Two broken legs and
"My cat is stuck in a tree!!!"


On the thirteenth day on call, my boss did talk to me....
(I said, "Aaargh! Too much pressure! I gotta take a break! I need a vacation!)
And he gave me cash to cruise the open seeeeeeea.

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.4
How Funny: 4.3
Overall Rating: 4.4

Total Votes: 47

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   2
 3
 1
 
 2   2
 2
 4
 
 3   5
 3
 2
 
 4   6
 9
 10
 
 5   32
 30
 30
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Syncronos - March 13, 2003 - Report this comment
Friggin' HILARIOUS!!!!!
Tim Hall - March 13, 2003 - Report this comment
This is a great way to express job-related frustrations. Keep up the good work!
Jeff Reuben - March 13, 2003 - Report this comment
I enjoyed reading this...good job
Rice Cube - March 13, 2003 - Report this comment
Fiiiiiiiiiiiiiive robberiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiies :-D That's great!
Galadriel - March 13, 2003 - Report this comment
Nice job! Very funny!
PoetPatriot @ http://www.FoolBay.com - April 13, 2003 - Report this comment
Maybe I've got the tune wrong (probably) My cat is stuck in a tree. --- doesn't seem to do it for me. Perhaps- My cat is stuck up in the willow tree. or- My cat is stuck up in the big fir tree. Oh well, it's already writen anyway and I've not as yet written a single parody. Outside of my little problem ...... Good J O B ! ! ! Enjoy the following poem. THE HEROES by Roger W Hancock Some heroes obvious, some unsung, their lives and health, tempting fate. Vulnerable in tasks for our civilization, few glories for their life’s profession. The Service men in our Armed Forces, the cause be sure for freedom’s sake. For their family, strangers, citizens all, few medals show their life’s duress. The policeman whose life is in peril, by high-speed chase, gunfight ensued. The simple traffic stop may kill, few medals show the dangers faced. The man who is trained as a fireman, to save our lives, our homes from fire. The first on scene when aid in need, few medals show each hazardous deed. The utilities that keep our comfort whole, power and phone, the men on poles. Sewage, garbage disposed for health, no recognition for the civilian fight. The many others whose work obscure, performing tasks with risks not yours. Construction, or the viral flu to cure, no medals glory for the civilian plight. Roger W Hancock © 11-11-2001 www.FoolBay.com
Kelaal - May 08, 2003 - Report this comment
FunnyFunnyFunnyFunnyFunnyFunnyFunnyFunnyFunny. I LOVED it.
jazzyjoan - September 12, 2003 - Report this comment
being in that spot myself, BoyHowdy, I can relate..... gotta have a sense of humor in that job. Very, very funny......
Alexandra - July 21, 2004 - Report this comment
OMG hahaahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!!!!! lol '' He's in a tree!!!!!''
Fitu - October 17, 2004 - Report this comment
You think i'm surprise by seeing whats has been submitting to my subject.
Kat - January 08, 2005 - Report this comment
Oh Man! KE, this was awsome!
Dangling Chad - February 12, 2005 - Report this comment
Twelve comments. 27 overall 5's.

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