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Song Parodies -> "Connie Lies Over My Scrotum"

Original Song Title:

"My Bonnie Lies Over The Ocean"

Original Performer:


Parody Song Title:

"Connie Lies Over My Scrotum"

Parody Written by:


The Lyrics

Oh, Connie lies over my scrotum
Wild Connie, a nympho, is she
And Connie has big boobs, she growed 'em
And last night she showed 'em to me..

Front, back, front, back
Front and back of Connie, I see, I see
Great stack, don't lack..
I banged old Connie, she, me..

Last night as we played on my pillow
Last night as we played on my bed
I got sick and tossed all my cookies
When she took the bag off her head..

Please don't..bring back
Don't bring back Connie, to me, to me
Please don't bring back Connie to me..

My best friend is Hector, her husband
A together twosome are we
Last night we were Jack Daniels guzzln'
Played poker, he lost her to me..

Take back, take back,
I think he cheated, Conn-ed me
She "Shaq"
Oh, please, Hector, take back Conn-ee

Oh, please, Hector, take back Conn-ee

Your Vote & Comment Counts

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 

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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 4.8
Overall Rating: 4.9

Total Votes: 21

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   1
 5   20

User Comments

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Guy - November 19, 2007 - Report this comment
Back in my USAF days I knew a Russian Linguist named Connie who was uglier than the ugly stick. Strange how the name stuck though - everyone called her Connie Linguist. Did this Connie in this parody happen to be able to speak and understand Russian? Hope she's not reading this.

By the way you conned me into reading this with that title. The title alone is worth 5s which is probably 4 more than she is on a scale of 1 to 10.
John Barry - November 19, 2007 - Report this comment
It's bonnie tune you doone.
alvin - November 19, 2007 - Report this comment
you're supposed to wear a bag too in case HERS fals off...a fun sing-a-long
AFW - November 19, 2007 - Report this comment
Thanks, fellas...I guess you're right alvin.why be half safe.. :)
Below Average Dave ( - November 19, 2007 - Report this comment
My eyes are popping out :) Wow, what a parody. . .king of the non contest parodists AFW!
Rick C - November 19, 2007 - Report this comment
HAH! Brilliant parody, considering the short lines you had to work with. I was laughing all the way through. 555
PMS - November 19, 2007 - Report this comment
LOL funny
BonnieB - November 19, 2007 - Report this comment
I hate the original, naturally, hence the name, so I am all for parodying this one. I laughed out loud. Good job.
MrMacphisto - November 19, 2007 - Report this comment
LMAO... Man, I can't really decide which is better... this one or Phil's bad porno one... Great job...
John Jenkins - November 19, 2007 - Report this comment
Very amusing story, AFW.
Dee Range - November 20, 2007 - Report this comment
Terrific job on this, AFW. Hilarious scenario and LOL funny all he way through. Top Shelf 5's
Phil Alexander - November 20, 2007 - Report this comment
Hilarious stuff, AFW - lovely twist at the end (well, just after half-way, anyway).
Guy - sounds like it ought to be a limerick: There once was a linguist called Connie
Whose face looked like Reg Kray, or Ronnie
Yes, she looked like a bloke
And then when she spoke
You'd swear she was really a Johnny

..or something like that :-)
Kristof Robertson - November 20, 2007 - Report this comment
Blindingly brilliant title sub, AFW...and a corker of a parody as well (with the twist in the middle for a change) 555
AFW - November 20, 2007 - Report this comment
Thanks everyone for voting and commenting
Connie - January 26, 2009 - Report this comment
Thank you for penning these loverly lyrics about our nights together entwined in passionate hotness! I KNEW you love me! You really love me!!!! I'm coming over with Girl Scout cookies.
AFW - January 26, 2009 - Report this comment
"CONNIE !!!!!! You've come back....If you bring those cookies...I'll toss mine, again."
Andria - January 27, 2009 - Report this comment
Great parody, AFW, although it borders slightly on being lewd. I also knew someone named Connie, who was also extremely ugly as Guy stated but was most likely not the same person, and she was teased and mistreated so much that she ended up committed to the Washington state mental hospital. She was a regular customer at the Sam Goody CD store that I once worked at when living in Seattle. 5s.
< ! ! ! > - January 28, 2009 - Report this comment
Sir, you're eviction notice will be served soon, from that Double Wide Pit o' Passion you've got going there !
connie - October 25, 2009 - Report this comment
i am connie an my boobs are mine and i dont drink with strangers an my gf is name brookelynn i have a cookie

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