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Song Parodies -> "Don't Take The Titanic"

Original Song Title:

"On Top Of Old Smoky"

Original Performer:

Traditional

Parody Song Title:

"Don't Take The Titanic"

Parody Written by:

Airfarcewon

The Lyrics

Don't Take The Titanic...
Don't sail on that ship
Not even if your clothes
Are press free, dry drip..

I purchased two tickets (he purchased two tickets)
At Southampton Bay (at Southampton Bay)
Then, I heard a strange voice ( he heard a strange voice)
On that fateful day (on that fateful day)

Don't Take The Titanic
Your chances are slim
Across the Atlantic
You may have to swim...

So, I saw a gypsy (yes, he saw a gypsy)
Before it set sail (before it set sail)
She said buy life insurance (told him, buy life insurance)
Make a will without fail (make a will without fail)

Don't Take The Titanic
Don't get on that boat
Now, is time to panic
It won't stay afloat...

When she peered in her crystal (when she peered in her chrystal)
I peered at her boob (he peered at her boob)
She said I see an iceberg (she said I see an iceberg)
Not lettuce, you Rube.. (not lettuce, you Rube..)

I hugged her and kissed her (he hugged her and kissed her)
For saving my life (for saving his life)
I said I think I love you (he said I think I love you)
Will you please be my wife? (will you please be his wife?)

Don't Take The Titanic
A trip you'll resent
Tell Orville and Wilbur
A plane to invent...

That day we got married (that day they got married)
That night I got drunk (that night he got drunk)
Woke up the next morning (woke up the next morning)
In a big steamer trunk (in a big steamer trunk)

I'm on the Titanic (he's on the Titanic)
On shore is my wife (on shore was his wife)
She has my life insurance (she has his life insurance)
End of story,...and my life (end of story...and his life)

Yes, I Took The Titanic (he took the Titanic)
I'm trapped on this boat (he's trapped on that boat)
She's my beneficiary (she's his beneficiary)
And that's all she wrote (and that's all she wrote...)

Don't Take The Titanic
Don't sail on that ship
Not even if your clothes
Are press free, dry drip........

And that's all I wrote...






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 LittleLots
Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 13

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 0
 0
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   0
 0
 0
 
 5   13
 13
 13
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Peter Andersson a.k.a K1chyd - April 17, 2006 - Report this comment
Clever story! :-)
alvin rhodes - April 17, 2006 - Report this comment
i wish i had just read this and skipped the movie
Paree Dee - April 17, 2006 - Report this comment
I just love a parody that tells a twist-y story !! Very cute !
Stephen Harrington - April 17, 2006 - Report this comment
5s, good.
Matthias - April 17, 2006 - Report this comment
Only part your missing is when he painted her naked, I'd take the Titanic just for that....
Rick C - April 17, 2006 - Report this comment
A clever and funny tale of clairvoyance and treachery. Loved the "I stared at her boob" gag. 555
TJC - April 17, 2006 - Report this comment
Very funny, I like the story line's clever twists...
AFW - April 17, 2006 - Report this comment
Thanks, Peter, alvin, Paree, Stephen, Matthias, Rick C, and TJC
carol - April 17, 2006 - Report this comment
three 5's glub glub glub.........
Dee Range - April 17, 2006 - Report this comment
High 5's. Great storyline and funny!!
AFW - April 17, 2006 - Report this comment
Thanks, carol, cute......and thanks much, Dee
Tommy Turtle - April 17, 2006 - Report this comment
"iceberg) Not lettuce, " - lol... a great Romaine a clef. 555, and that's no bullship.
Red Ant - April 18, 2006 - Report this comment
Never saw the movie, so I missed out on some of the humor. Giving you 5s is easier than sitting through a 3 hour movie to which I already know the ending. ;-)
Sam_Spam - April 18, 2006 - Report this comment
LOL!!! Great whale of a tale, dude!!
Larry Hensley - April 18, 2006 - Report this comment
Nice storytelling, 555s
AFW - April 18, 2006 - Report this comment
thanks, Tommy, Red Ant, (Disclaimer: this parody was not based on anything in the movie, ...and not intended to have any connection to the movie)................and thanks, Sam_Spam, and Larry...
Klaus Höß - February 23, 2008 - Report this comment
Just found this site today and after some dozen of songs, this was the best up to now!
AFW - February 23, 2008 - Report this comment
Thank you, Klaus...appreciate your kind comment

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