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Song Parodies -> "Cat’s in the Bag"

Original Song Title:

"Vatican Rag"

Original Performer:

Tom Lehrer

Parody Song Title:

"Cat’s in the Bag"

Parody Written by:

John A. Barry

The Lyrics

I utter, “felinity,”
with utter felicity.
Yet I guess you might suspect:
The expression I project’s indirect.

I’m not pressing on to spawn tiffs
like mild vexed lexophile gonifs,
when this phrase I will intone:
Kitty’s got a sack that’s home…
croonin’, “The cat’s in the bag.”

I opine: It’s categorical;
this catchphrase is metaphorical.
Here’s a lesson that is lexical
and won’t make you “cat”aplexical.

Homes in on wit that ain’t rapier…
homo sapiens but apier.
This phrase I prate
to rate my state as “just great!”

When I keen “felinity”…
means my scene’s seen swimmingly.
But…could use it for effect
to misdirect, misdirect, misdirect.

That cat’s act just might be roamin’
from that sack where it be homin’.
Ah, that’d be a
diction diarrhea.
Sh*t!, I’d just be rappin’,
syntactically crappin’.
Loose is the cat from the bag!

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