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Song Parodies -> "The Wiener-Spitzer Waltz"

Original Song Title:

"The Wiener Schnitzel Waltz"

Original Performer:

Tom Lehrer

Parody Song Title:

"The Wiener-Spitzer Waltz"

Parody Written by:

Barry J. Mitchel

The Lyrics

This is my tribute to the Democrat Party's candidates for mayor and comptroller of New York City. Despite scandalous pasts that forced them to resign former posts, their elections are virtually assured by a strong left-leaning voter base and the absence of moderate candidates. This is my 22nd Tom Lehrer parody, first one on this site that's based on his humorous ballroom ballad.
Do you remember the sight, I swelled with delight,
As we chanced on those Wiener-Spitzer faults?
The news of that day: each was betting on sleazy tease.
One shared organ poses (or perhaps they were beefcake cheese).
Number Nine was dour client with alts. (aliases)
As they pants tossed, unclean
Grew the stains of the Wiener-Spitzer waltz.

Spitzer banked from campaign, slummed untrue.
He was plunked high and slimed by bought crew.
Wife didn't know as she waited to sup,
It was taking two hotties to thrill his thing up.

Splitting fly, Weiner's leapt to impress. (la, la, la)
The flirts called shamed boffo address, (la, la, la)
Revealing for all without brothers to see
Just what it is that appears when boys pee.

But these gents were not bright, were felled to no might,
Were de-pantsed through the media's assaults.
News clips blur with time (they've been pardoned by Dem elite),
As New York is governed by white Bloomberg nanny fleet.
Why shrank RINOs? Thank locked gestalts.
Soon they'll both turn, quite green,
To the reins of the leaner city vaults.

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 3

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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User Comments

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Barry J. Mitchel - August 27, 2013 - Report this comment
A better OS match for Line 5 is "Client Nine viewed tour hobby as alts." (subs for his wife)
John Jenkins - August 27, 2013 - Report this comment
Very good parody, but I don't understand the "their elections are virtually assured" comment. Anthony Wiener is a distant fourth in the last Democrat mayor primary poll I saw (and I haven't seen any Comptroller polls).
AFW - August 27, 2013 - Report this comment
Nice political spoofing, Barry...hard to write a bad parody, about these two guys
Barry J. Mitchel - August 27, 2013 - Report this comment
JJ: I should have said that the Democrat candidate, whoever it is, will win each elective office.
John Jenkins - August 27, 2013 - Report this comment
I agree that Democrats will most likely win. But, since Bloomberg didn't call himself a Democrat, a Democrat has not won the mayor election in 24 years.
Rob Arndt - August 27, 2013 - Report this comment
Well done Barry the Man- 555!!!
Barry J. Mitchel - August 28, 2013 - Report this comment
Thanks, AFW & Rob. The title came easily; the lyrics took a week's thought and massaging.

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