Labor Day's here and summer's over - it's Halloween
Stores advertising through October - it's Halloween
When level headed people start to go insane
And holler, "Oh, boy! It's Halloween.".

Plutonian shadows come together as days decline
Revelers are freaks of a feather - out of their minds
Although the prospect sickens here we go again
Oh, brother, once more it's Halloween.

In the cacophony of night
We lay low out of sight, put out the light
With the doors and windows locked up tight
Minutes turn to eons before day dawns.

Imaginary Martians haunt us - invade our world
Folks dressed as Nazis come to taunt us - TP unfurled
Tonight I count the hours 'till the clock strikes twelve
Hoping it's the end of Halloween.

Here in the aftermath of night
We're cleaning pumpkin shards from our front yards
Streamers of toilet paper hanging high
The silly season's here on time each year.

Multiplex horror movies thrill them as days of old
Orson Welles' tales of Martians chill them - nightmares unfold
Those grinning Jack 'o Lanterns lighting up the road
Aren't Martians - it's only Halloween
Oh, brother, once more it's Halloween.