Making fun of music, one song at a time. Since the year 2000.
Check out the two amIright misheard lyrics books including one book devoted to misheard lyrics of the 1980s.
(Toggle Right Side Navigation)

Song Parodies -> "Guv, Client Number 9"

Original Song Title:

"Love Potion Number 9"

Original Performer:

The Clovers

Parody Song Title:

"Guv, Client Number 9"

Parody Written by:

Michael Pacholek

The Lyrics

Suddenly, Jim McGreevey doesn't seem so bad. After all, in all the stunts he pulled, he didn't commit a crime (that we know of, as of March 2008). But Eliot Spitzer? This guy now known as "Client 9" kept telling us he was above it all. You know, Eliot, at this rate, people are gonna think the Democrats have a sex problem. Could be worse: At least he wasn't fooling around with a lobbyist, both figuratively AND literally, like John McCain. Of course, New Jersey's current Governor, Jon Corzine, had that problem too, but he currently doesn't have a wife to cheat on... As I type this, we await an announcement that Spitzer will resign in exchange for a plea deal that will keep him out of jail, and the media is swarming around his Manhattan apartment. Stay tuned...
I took my votes on down to Eliot.
Who turned out to be great big idiot.
They've got a tap on a hooker-service line.
It turns out that he is... Guv, Client Number 9.

He looks like he would be a flop with chicks.
We voted for him in 2006.
But look, shell-of-bomb, and he might have to resign.
It turns out that he is... Guv, Client Number 9.

He bent down and turned around and gave them some cash.
He said he took it out of his bank, out of his stash.
It smells like such a scandal, throw him into the trash.
I held my nose, I closed my eyes... his career's ash!

I didn't know if he would quit last night.
Calls for his resignation in plain sight.
And when he kissed that tramp, there just might have been a crime.
It turns out that he is... Guv, Client Number 9.

(instrumental break)

I held my nose, I closed my eyes... his career's ash!

I didn't know if he would quit last night.
Calls for his resignation in plain sight.
And when he kissed that tramp, there just might have been a crime.
It turns out that he is
Guv, Client Number 9.
Guv, Client Number 9.
Guv, Client Number 9.
Guv, Client Number 9.
(repeat 'til fade, or until Spitzer fades)

Your Vote & Comment Counts

The parody authors spend a lot of time writing parodies for the website and they appreciate feedback in the form of votes and comments. Please take some time to leave a comment below about this parody.

Place Your Vote

 LittleLots
Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 



In order for your vote to count, you need to hit the 'Place Your Vote' button.
 

Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.5
How Funny: 4.5
Overall Rating: 4.5

Total Votes: 11

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 1
 1
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   1
 1
 1
 
 5   9
 9
 9
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

John Jenkins - March 12, 2008 - Report this comment
Spitzer says that the things he did that are causing people to demand his resignation are "private matters." They probably should be private matters, except that Mr. Spitzer prosecuted people for "private matters." Good job, MP. I should probably deduct something since this is the #2 #9 parody, but then I should add it back for MP spoofing a Dem.
Michael Pacholek - March 12, 2008 - Report this comment
I posted this one before I saw the first one based on LP#9. It's now official: Spitzer has resigned.
Stan Hall - March 12, 2008 - Report this comment
NIce whack, MP.

JJ -- glad you returned MP's "deductibles" for the reason cited. I've seen the occasional Dem-donated parodies (including at least one of my own, viz "Name Game"/"Lame Game") taking their deserving own to task for foibles and felonies but rarely-brinking-never see even that moderate level of even-handedness among GOP rally-'rounders here. Of course, a lame plow-horse outracing Secretariat would be a safer bet than any acknowledgement of a partymate's misbehavior by amiright's loudest GOP voice. I doubt naming names is necessary. :-)
Melanie Lee - March 12, 2008 - Report this comment
Good work; a couple of good laughs. And to my knowledge there's no rule that only one person can spoof a song per scandal. I thought mine was funnier, though. (Nervy, ain't she?) And yes, it would be nice to see a right-winger spoof one of their own. 5-4-5.
Max Powet - March 12, 2008 - Report this comment
Number 9...number 9...number 9...
Linda T - March 12, 2008 - Report this comment
Isn't that a bit harsh for a fellow demoncrat? I don't think so, but coming from you - I am shocked! I liked it, but I didn't vote... I'm not like all those bitter little pills who give me all 1's even when my song is not political at all... out of spite & stuff. But - I'm not as nasty as they are! -- no score, but I liked it.
little-Client-Cake - March 12, 2008 - Report this comment
555 sir Michael ! They need to ask this fellow . . . Just what kinda of women are worth $4,300/nite?? And who are they??? Do the taXpayers have a right to know??
MasonR - March 12, 2008 - Report this comment
OK, who's gonna turn "Mambo #5" to "Client #9"? LOL, MP! And I agree, McGreevy looks good by comparison (which isn't saying much)
Ironman - March 12, 2008 - Report this comment
"OK, who's gonna turn "Mambo #5" to "Client #9"? LOL," I heard a parody done to this song on the radio totonight but can't seem to find it on the internet yet.
Guy - March 14, 2008 - Report this comment
Another good bash, Michael and you were right "He looks like he would be a flop with chicks" Looks have little or nothing to do with it when you have pics. of "good Looking" although dead Presidents. Great choice of song being he was # 9 on the ballot. When you get 'em, you get 'em. And I recall writing on McGreevey in a very time sensitive fashion - like hours after the story broke. You did not as I recall even try to defend your former governor. You are always either "fair or balanced" I think. Anyway good post, Michael. I'm voting for # 5on yur ballot.
Robert J. Pagliaro - March 14, 2008 - Report this comment
Guy - he had absolutely no support - only Alan Dershowitz. I've been vocal about the republican hypocrisy and have been equally vocal in my daily life on Spitzer's hypocrisy. He deserved to go and he deserves what he gets. Besides, I wouldn't mind dating his wife.

That being said, what Michael didn't tell you was that it was another attempt by the state of New Jersey to take down the Great State of New York - the prostitute was from New Jersey.
UnKnownVo - March 14, 2008 - Report this comment
Sir Robert, you stay away from Silda! It's still Lent . . .

The author of the parody has authorized comments, and wants YOUR feedback.

Link To This Page

The address of this page is: http://www.amiright.com/parody/misc/theclovers3.shtml For help, see the examples of how to link to this page.

This is view # 2186